Its Just... Ahhhh
I jus dont kno ne more. Selby and I are still not speaking and I find myself still dialing his number wen I kno oll Imma hear is the operater say "the number your trying to reach is temperaily disconnect". I jus dont kno ne more I dont wanna break up wit him... N if I do I wont nor have anyone else. Hes the only one but I jus am so worried and scared and confused and just ahhh to the point im looking at the clock going how many days is this going to go on and how long has it been. Its like Selby is my past I mean 3 fucking weeks.
I was playing pool wit my mom rite after I was hiddin n my room smokin a black. I went down n shes like relax wha r u stressed about im like wha r u talking about. Shes like shoot soft and I realize I cant because wen I play pool I think of Ricky. Everynight Im scared to look out my window because Im afried he'll be there. On good days I realize how stupid it sounds n I shut off my tv and am not in need of a light. I cant sleep ever ne more only wen its day time. Wen I can wake up and see whas and wha isnt in my room.
I took selbys pictures off my mirror and my friend Debbie asked if Im trying to forget him and im like no but it hurts to look wen I kno theres nothing there. I dont see love wen I look at our pictures or his shirt I feel a cold hearted friend who cant pick up a goddamn fone. Debbie told me I have a reason to be angry so I decided I wont cry Ill just dry myself crazy by asking why. I thought about the future so ta speak and I cudnt trust another guy I look at oll guys as sumone who wud hurt me or as playas. But not selby...
I think thats why its so hard to let him go
I was playing pool wit my mom rite after I was hiddin n my room smokin a black. I went down n shes like relax wha r u stressed about im like wha r u talking about. Shes like shoot soft and I realize I cant because wen I play pool I think of Ricky. Everynight Im scared to look out my window because Im afried he'll be there. On good days I realize how stupid it sounds n I shut off my tv and am not in need of a light. I cant sleep ever ne more only wen its day time. Wen I can wake up and see whas and wha isnt in my room.
I took selbys pictures off my mirror and my friend Debbie asked if Im trying to forget him and im like no but it hurts to look wen I kno theres nothing there. I dont see love wen I look at our pictures or his shirt I feel a cold hearted friend who cant pick up a goddamn fone. Debbie told me I have a reason to be angry so I decided I wont cry Ill just dry myself crazy by asking why. I thought about the future so ta speak and I cudnt trust another guy I look at oll guys as sumone who wud hurt me or as playas. But not selby...
I think thats why its so hard to let him go