"real" love

[cujennaboo5c]

I found out he was seeing this other girl.  Turned out that he wasn't in love with me, like I thought.  What I'm trying to say is, I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible.  And how it can actually ache in places you didn't know you had inside you.  And it doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get, or  gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends, you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong, or how you could have misunderstood.  And how in the hell, for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy.  And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and he'll show up at your door.  And after all that, however long all that might be, you'll go somewhere new, and you'll meet people who'll make you feel worthwhile again.  And little pieces of your soul will finally come back.  And all the fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade.

~Kate Winslet
The Holiday