long day
Today sucked. I woke up at 9 this morning to deliver my papers! They have to be delivered by like eight? I'm not even sure, but it was way to late, and I had to rush and take a shower and make it to work and deliver my papers by 10. It was horrible. Worked from 10-12 and then I got to go to the game, that was fun. I was very disappointed because Ms. L told me I would most likely be aloud to play with the band, and I was sooooo ready and overly excited about it. You don't even know. I've realized that I miss band more than anything this year. I love the fact that I get to leave school at 10:50 everyday. and I just now started to stay until 11:40 because mel asked me to be in concert band, so I am now. That's wonderful too, for now. I'm sure I'll get tired of it, but I need to suck it up. Anyway, getting out of school is nice, but I feel like I'm not myself (the person i've been the past 3 years) because I'm not in that band. It really was a big part of me, no matter how much I complained about it, or how many days I never wanted to be there when I was in it. It really has effected me, to not be there with all of the people. I just don't know.... When Ms. L told me I wasn't aloud to play in the stands, my heart sank. As sad as that sounds, I was really truely disappointed. It really let me down, but I only have myself to blame for that. I let myself down. It eats me up inside. I should have listened to everyone... I just feel like I lost my "family" (band family). It's sad, it makes me sad. I regret so many things I do. I never make the right choices.
On another note, I'm trying out for windensamble. Monday's the tryouts, I think. I don't even know. Ugh, I need to do it. I have to, for the sake of myself. I just dont know.
So after homecoming Deanna, Nikki, and I went to taco bell. That was fun and yummy. Then I came home and got changed and it was back to work for crystal. I worked from five to ten thirty. It was fun though. I like working with people I'm friends with. It sucks when they're not there. Some people I work with just make my freggin day,they're so funny. It makes going to work worth while (that and then there's always the money, lol.) Anyway, work wasn't that bad. I don't like the new store manager. He's a dick head. For real. Grrr.
So hey, it's a saturday night, worked all day for the most part. I have my liscence finally and a car. I have money to spend, and gas in my car. IT'S SATURDAY! Why am I not out? Being a teenager and having fun!?!?!? Who the hell knows. I really need to make some adjustments in the things I do. Grrr
Krista, Ashley, and Donny went to a gay club tonight. I'm alone and bored. I hope they're having fun. Melissa told me they locked their keys in ashley's car. lol That really sucks, it's definatally a "crystal" move.
On a different note, I'm still overly upset because a certain someone hasn't talked to me. It's really rediculous. It makes me upset and I start to cry. I don't know why I even bother to try and talk to this person... but not talking to this person makes everything so much harder, and makes me so upset all the time. I think about it and cry... (tearing up now)
I miss so much
Life is not fair
No work tomorrow, heather wants to go christmas shopping. Joy, cause I even like these relatives that we're shopping for, and to top that off I have no money.
I would rather not spend money and in return, not get any presents.
That would make me happy, I don't even want to think about christmas.
Bah'humbug.
...Fall is pretty...
On another note, I'm trying out for windensamble. Monday's the tryouts, I think. I don't even know. Ugh, I need to do it. I have to, for the sake of myself. I just dont know.
So after homecoming Deanna, Nikki, and I went to taco bell. That was fun and yummy. Then I came home and got changed and it was back to work for crystal. I worked from five to ten thirty. It was fun though. I like working with people I'm friends with. It sucks when they're not there. Some people I work with just make my freggin day,they're so funny. It makes going to work worth while (that and then there's always the money, lol.) Anyway, work wasn't that bad. I don't like the new store manager. He's a dick head. For real. Grrr.
So hey, it's a saturday night, worked all day for the most part. I have my liscence finally and a car. I have money to spend, and gas in my car. IT'S SATURDAY! Why am I not out? Being a teenager and having fun!?!?!? Who the hell knows. I really need to make some adjustments in the things I do. Grrr
Krista, Ashley, and Donny went to a gay club tonight. I'm alone and bored. I hope they're having fun. Melissa told me they locked their keys in ashley's car. lol That really sucks, it's definatally a "crystal" move.
On a different note, I'm still overly upset because a certain someone hasn't talked to me. It's really rediculous. It makes me upset and I start to cry. I don't know why I even bother to try and talk to this person... but not talking to this person makes everything so much harder, and makes me so upset all the time. I think about it and cry... (tearing up now)
I miss so much
Life is not fair
No work tomorrow, heather wants to go christmas shopping. Joy, cause I even like these relatives that we're shopping for, and to top that off I have no money.
I would rather not spend money and in return, not get any presents.
That would make me happy, I don't even want to think about christmas.
Bah'humbug.
...Fall is pretty...