meander
(i forgot to post this yesterday)
i'm completely disorganized and disconnected. it's as though on the night of aurum i climbed into a resting-place and forgot the way out. i am lost, surely, but where did i go? i can't find myself at the moment; i've forgotten my reasons and misplaced all my meticulously inked out maps.
watching the heirs all over again helped only a little - i regained a sense of reality, of a solid world when i cried, but it was too temporal, perhaps? (even i don't understand this bit, really) i suspect that reading a tale for the time being restored the disconnect. naoko and old jiko and the beautiful zen beliefs and quantum physics only make the world even more unreal and less rooted in purpose of sufficient gravity.
직진 / go straight / 生 - i will still plough on, keeping in mind these words
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