Why Not To Fly Your Freak Flag
I've been reflecting more on some of the things that I wrote about yesterday, and decided to write a little bit more here.
Yesterday's thoughts dealt with not letting others get you down just because your idea of "fun" is different from theirs.
Today I'm writing about why it's not always a good thing to be proud to be a freak.
Most of us that have been to conventions of any kind - whether it's a furry convention, or a sci-fi convention, or even just a simple ren faire - have, at one point or another, gone out into public dressed a little deviated from the norm. Something about what we're wearing is completely out of context, once we leave the convention space or the fairgrounds. Some people will recall, "Oh yeah, there's that convention going on in town," or "That's right, the ren faire was this weekend," but not all of them will know what's going on. If you're wearing something out of the ordinary, be prepared to get a lot of double-takes.
Outside of certain settings, there are appropriate times and places to be flying your freak flag. Many casual situations - for example, going to a high school or college campus - might not be too bad. To compare once again, the furry fandom to my experience as a Christian in high school, I can see many similarities. When I was a kid, I loved wearing Christian t-shirts. While all the other ghetto kids were wearing their FUBU shirts, I wore one bearing the "FB" logo but underneath would say, "Fully Blessed." I had all sorts of witty Christian t-shirts (still do! They're in my closet and make regular appearances when it's too cold out for tank tops, curse the Florida winter) just like I now own a number of furry t-shirts.
But there is such a thing as over-doing it. I think I learned this early on as a Christian, and have transferred my experiences over to the furry fandom, which, when you think about it, isn't really all that different in some respects. Christians and furries both can be picked on something fierce by those that don't understand, and we strive (well, most of us) to put on our best face so that others know that we're not really like the bad apples they might have seen on TV, or met a few years ago, or read about on the Internet. But I digress. :)
I've got my rotation of t-shirts, some of which are furry, some might be Christian, but both of these are a little toned down. I no longer wear the shirts that scream "I'M A CHEESY CHRISTIAN T-SHIRT, AREN'T I WITTY??" because it causes people to draw conclusions about me, sometimes bad conclusions about me. It still makes me grin if I see someone wearing a funny or witty Christian t-shirt, but it's not for me, I've learned this lesson. Instead, I'll choose a more subtle t-shirt, perhaps one for a band I like.
Likewise, I don't wear "overly furry" t-shirts most of the time. I don't really have many, but I do have two t-shirts from MFM (including the one that I designed the logo for, and no, I don't wear it very often except as a pajama shirt, and even then usually just during conventions, for the fun of it) and they strike me as being "too furry" because they just scream "something different." Instead, if I wear furry t-shirts, I tend to wear my FWA t-shirts, which I love for the subtle pocket logo on the front and the adorable cartoons on the back.
In both cases, there is such a thing as being "too overbearing." When you loudly proclaim to the world that I AM A PART OF THIS GROUP you immediately subject yourself to labels from someone else's preconception of that group, and there's no telling whether that will be a good or a bad thing. If you opt for a more subtle way of displaying your participation in said group, you will come across as more approachable by those that aren't a part of it, and will be able to share answers to any questions they have. Again, whether this is for Christianity and sharing your faith and the gospel of Jesus Christ, or whether it's for proving wrong the public misconceptions surrounding the furry fandom, subtlety is key for being approachable and likable.
This extends to more than just your outer appearance in person. It also includes your web site, even your whole online presence. You'll notice this with a number of fursuit/mascot makers. They're not so quick to use the word "fursuit" on their web site, instead referring to them as "costumes" or even "mascots." The reason for this is not necessarily because they're ashamed of the furry fandom - in fact, if it weren't for the fandom, us fursuit makers probably wouldn't have about 99% of the business we do - but it is to keep the web sites friendly toward those that haven't a clue about the furry fandom. When you use fandom-specific terms - and again, this goes for ANY fandom, not just furry but anime, sci-fi, paranormal, anything - it tends to scare away people that are just looking for a specific product that you happen to make, and they may not make a purchase because they might think that your product isn't actually what they want. Because of taming their online presence to the point of being friendly toward those that aren't in a fandom, some costume designers have had great success with building mascot characters for sport teams, businesses, churches, and more.
Personally, I've had a number of people contact me for costume pieces, and none of them were even remotely related to the furry fandom. Initially, it started with being contacted by Cookie Magazine (now out of print) to use a wolf tail in their instructions for an easy Halloween costume. Because of this press, I had over 400 orders - not a one of them associated with any fandom - for Halloween last year.
In addition to this, I've also been contacted by school teachers inquiring after sets for their students to use in school plays and musicals, and even sold a set to a photographer to be used in a photoshoot for the cover of the American release of Spice & Wolf, due to be released this June.
My words today might seem contradictory to what I wrote yesterday, about not letting anyone rain on your parade, so long as you're having fun. But, as my high school English teacher so often reminded us, "Moderation in all things." There's nothing wrong with playing dress-up as an animal, so long as it's an appropriate time. Don't expect to be seen as credible when you walk in for a job interview wearing your ears & tail and a werewolf t-shirt; that just isn't going to help anything. A day off hanging out with friends at the mall? Sure, why not! Going to the first screening of the latest fantasy or sci-fi movie? Have at it!! There are plenty of "freaks" attending these and anyone at these events is going to join in the fun. There's nothing wrong with being a weirdo, just learn to contain it, if you want to be taken seriously.
My biggest example of this comes from Furry Weekend a couple years ago. I know some of you have already heard this story, but bear with me. ;)
We were at the Sheraton, and we had brought our dog with us. I was coming inside from taking him out to relieve himself in the evening, when I was approached by a middle-aged couple (late 40's/early 50's?) and asked what in the world was going on at the hotel this weekend. I began to explain - my descriptions usually consist of "it's for fans of cartoons, costuming and puppetry, focusing specifically on animals" - when some nerd overheard the question, pulled out his smart phone, and began pulling up photos and giving some stupid presentation to these people that hadn't even spoken to him.
If someone asks, "What is all this?" They're not looking for a historical background to the furry fandom. They don't care that fur cons started as small groups at sci-fi fan conventions that grew so large they could have their own conventions. They don't care about the obscure comics and fanzines that were published in the early days and kept fanboys connected. They just want the short answer, to be reassured that it's not some kind of creepy convention and that it's just a bunch of dorks coming together to have a fun time.
To once again relate the furry fandom to Christianity (might I add, at this point, that I have had formal training with my church in sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ, and my own personal faith; it's been so strange to draw these parallels and yet it seems to ring true for both) if someone asks you why you believe in God, you don't launch into the whole history of "Adam&EveandthenNoahohandMosesandDavid&Goliathohbutdon'tforgetBathshebaandalltheseotherstories" complete with pictures and diagrams. They want to know about your personal involvement and why you believe in what you do, why you participate in what you do. It may not be their cup of tea, but the last thing you want to do is overwhelm someone with more information than they really wanted in the first place, because it is just going to scare them off.
Instead, keep your manners polite, don't look down on others for not "getting it" or thinking you're weird (because, face it, you ARE!) and don't overwhelm people with fandom phrases or history when they just want to get to the core of the idea. By keeping it simple, you keep your fandom (whatever it may be, again this doesn't just relate to furries!) more understandable by those that might not otherwise have a clue. And that's what you want, isn't it? :)
Pardon my ramblings, time for me to get back to work. :)
Yesterday's thoughts dealt with not letting others get you down just because your idea of "fun" is different from theirs.
Today I'm writing about why it's not always a good thing to be proud to be a freak.
Most of us that have been to conventions of any kind - whether it's a furry convention, or a sci-fi convention, or even just a simple ren faire - have, at one point or another, gone out into public dressed a little deviated from the norm. Something about what we're wearing is completely out of context, once we leave the convention space or the fairgrounds. Some people will recall, "Oh yeah, there's that convention going on in town," or "That's right, the ren faire was this weekend," but not all of them will know what's going on. If you're wearing something out of the ordinary, be prepared to get a lot of double-takes.
Outside of certain settings, there are appropriate times and places to be flying your freak flag. Many casual situations - for example, going to a high school or college campus - might not be too bad. To compare once again, the furry fandom to my experience as a Christian in high school, I can see many similarities. When I was a kid, I loved wearing Christian t-shirts. While all the other ghetto kids were wearing their FUBU shirts, I wore one bearing the "FB" logo but underneath would say, "Fully Blessed." I had all sorts of witty Christian t-shirts (still do! They're in my closet and make regular appearances when it's too cold out for tank tops, curse the Florida winter) just like I now own a number of furry t-shirts.
But there is such a thing as over-doing it. I think I learned this early on as a Christian, and have transferred my experiences over to the furry fandom, which, when you think about it, isn't really all that different in some respects. Christians and furries both can be picked on something fierce by those that don't understand, and we strive (well, most of us) to put on our best face so that others know that we're not really like the bad apples they might have seen on TV, or met a few years ago, or read about on the Internet. But I digress. :)
I've got my rotation of t-shirts, some of which are furry, some might be Christian, but both of these are a little toned down. I no longer wear the shirts that scream "I'M A CHEESY CHRISTIAN T-SHIRT, AREN'T I WITTY??" because it causes people to draw conclusions about me, sometimes bad conclusions about me. It still makes me grin if I see someone wearing a funny or witty Christian t-shirt, but it's not for me, I've learned this lesson. Instead, I'll choose a more subtle t-shirt, perhaps one for a band I like.
Likewise, I don't wear "overly furry" t-shirts most of the time. I don't really have many, but I do have two t-shirts from MFM (including the one that I designed the logo for, and no, I don't wear it very often except as a pajama shirt, and even then usually just during conventions, for the fun of it) and they strike me as being "too furry" because they just scream "something different." Instead, if I wear furry t-shirts, I tend to wear my FWA t-shirts, which I love for the subtle pocket logo on the front and the adorable cartoons on the back.
In both cases, there is such a thing as being "too overbearing." When you loudly proclaim to the world that I AM A PART OF THIS GROUP you immediately subject yourself to labels from someone else's preconception of that group, and there's no telling whether that will be a good or a bad thing. If you opt for a more subtle way of displaying your participation in said group, you will come across as more approachable by those that aren't a part of it, and will be able to share answers to any questions they have. Again, whether this is for Christianity and sharing your faith and the gospel of Jesus Christ, or whether it's for proving wrong the public misconceptions surrounding the furry fandom, subtlety is key for being approachable and likable.
This extends to more than just your outer appearance in person. It also includes your web site, even your whole online presence. You'll notice this with a number of fursuit/mascot makers. They're not so quick to use the word "fursuit" on their web site, instead referring to them as "costumes" or even "mascots." The reason for this is not necessarily because they're ashamed of the furry fandom - in fact, if it weren't for the fandom, us fursuit makers probably wouldn't have about 99% of the business we do - but it is to keep the web sites friendly toward those that haven't a clue about the furry fandom. When you use fandom-specific terms - and again, this goes for ANY fandom, not just furry but anime, sci-fi, paranormal, anything - it tends to scare away people that are just looking for a specific product that you happen to make, and they may not make a purchase because they might think that your product isn't actually what they want. Because of taming their online presence to the point of being friendly toward those that aren't in a fandom, some costume designers have had great success with building mascot characters for sport teams, businesses, churches, and more.
Personally, I've had a number of people contact me for costume pieces, and none of them were even remotely related to the furry fandom. Initially, it started with being contacted by Cookie Magazine (now out of print) to use a wolf tail in their instructions for an easy Halloween costume. Because of this press, I had over 400 orders - not a one of them associated with any fandom - for Halloween last year.
In addition to this, I've also been contacted by school teachers inquiring after sets for their students to use in school plays and musicals, and even sold a set to a photographer to be used in a photoshoot for the cover of the American release of Spice & Wolf, due to be released this June.
My words today might seem contradictory to what I wrote yesterday, about not letting anyone rain on your parade, so long as you're having fun. But, as my high school English teacher so often reminded us, "Moderation in all things." There's nothing wrong with playing dress-up as an animal, so long as it's an appropriate time. Don't expect to be seen as credible when you walk in for a job interview wearing your ears & tail and a werewolf t-shirt; that just isn't going to help anything. A day off hanging out with friends at the mall? Sure, why not! Going to the first screening of the latest fantasy or sci-fi movie? Have at it!! There are plenty of "freaks" attending these and anyone at these events is going to join in the fun. There's nothing wrong with being a weirdo, just learn to contain it, if you want to be taken seriously.
My biggest example of this comes from Furry Weekend a couple years ago. I know some of you have already heard this story, but bear with me. ;)
We were at the Sheraton, and we had brought our dog with us. I was coming inside from taking him out to relieve himself in the evening, when I was approached by a middle-aged couple (late 40's/early 50's?) and asked what in the world was going on at the hotel this weekend. I began to explain - my descriptions usually consist of "it's for fans of cartoons, costuming and puppetry, focusing specifically on animals" - when some nerd overheard the question, pulled out his smart phone, and began pulling up photos and giving some stupid presentation to these people that hadn't even spoken to him.
If someone asks, "What is all this?" They're not looking for a historical background to the furry fandom. They don't care that fur cons started as small groups at sci-fi fan conventions that grew so large they could have their own conventions. They don't care about the obscure comics and fanzines that were published in the early days and kept fanboys connected. They just want the short answer, to be reassured that it's not some kind of creepy convention and that it's just a bunch of dorks coming together to have a fun time.
To once again relate the furry fandom to Christianity (might I add, at this point, that I have had formal training with my church in sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ, and my own personal faith; it's been so strange to draw these parallels and yet it seems to ring true for both) if someone asks you why you believe in God, you don't launch into the whole history of "Adam&EveandthenNoahohandMosesandDavid&Goliathohbutdon'tforgetBathshebaandalltheseotherstories" complete with pictures and diagrams. They want to know about your personal involvement and why you believe in what you do, why you participate in what you do. It may not be their cup of tea, but the last thing you want to do is overwhelm someone with more information than they really wanted in the first place, because it is just going to scare them off.
Instead, keep your manners polite, don't look down on others for not "getting it" or thinking you're weird (because, face it, you ARE!) and don't overwhelm people with fandom phrases or history when they just want to get to the core of the idea. By keeping it simple, you keep your fandom (whatever it may be, again this doesn't just relate to furries!) more understandable by those that might not otherwise have a clue. And that's what you want, isn't it? :)
Pardon my ramblings, time for me to get back to work. :)