I'm sorry, Omar. I'm still glad you dated her, though, even if it was terrible aftermath, it's highs and lows and makes life worth living.
I'm fairly certain these questions do keep other people up at night.
My personal favorite charities are my local church and clean water in Africa. My parents support Florida Sherriff's Youth Ranches. The Salvation Army is probably the world's most efficient organization at turning donated dollars into directly helping people who truly need it. I realize getting directly involved with an individual has potential to be rewarding, but it also has so much potential to end up as a heartbreaking con. Ever see Les Mis? Beggars rent children to up their daily take. Bad stuff is done in the name of good, it's just part of life.
Anyway, my advice is, go with your gut. I don't think it's "concern for your own money" that is bothering you here, I think all of your alarm bells are going off and you suspect you are getting conned and it just doesn't feel right. And to some degree, you almost certainly are getting conned. Maybe half of your money really is helping a girl who needs it. Maybe. Seriously doubt it's more than that, though. If it's making you uncomfortable, walk away. If it ends up upsetting enough, change your phone number. Remember it's not a black/white thing here. You will continue to be a good person no matter what you decide to do, and getting pressured more than you're comfortable with doesn't make you any better. You can still be just as good helping in another way, giving to another charity, picking some other girl to help, or capping your support for Dolma at a level you are comfortable with dedicating to this particular cause.
In India, not only would the beggars rent or use children to up their daily take, but they would also drug babies to encourage sympathy for a "mother" holding "her" baby. Bad people will do anything to con those of us with sympathetic hearts, so we have to be wary of their intentions.
I'm sorry, Omar. I'm still glad you dated her, though, even if it was terrible aftermath, it's highs and lows and makes life worth living.
I'm fairly certain these questions do keep other people up at night.
My personal favorite charities are my local church and clean water in Africa. My parents support Florida Sherriff's Youth Ranches. The Salvation Army is probably the world's most efficient organization at turning donated dollars into directly helping people who truly need it. I realize getting directly involved with an individual has potential to be rewarding, but it also has so much potential to end up as a heartbreaking con. Ever see Les Mis? Beggars rent children to up their daily take. Bad stuff is done in the name of good, it's just part of life.
Anyway, my advice is, go with your gut. I don't think it's "concern for your own money" that is bothering you here, I think all of your alarm bells are going off and you suspect you are getting conned and it just doesn't feel right. And to some degree, you almost certainly are getting conned. Maybe half of your money really is helping a girl who needs it. Maybe. Seriously doubt it's more than that, though. If it's making you uncomfortable, walk away. If it ends up upsetting enough, change your phone number. Remember it's not a black/white thing here. You will continue to be a good person no matter what you decide to do, and getting pressured more than you're comfortable with doesn't make you any better. You can still be just as good helping in another way, giving to another charity, picking some other girl to help, or capping your support for Dolma at a level you are comfortable with dedicating to this particular cause.
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