I just wanted to tell you ( G1, Pg-15, various pairing/Starscream)
Story rated T: for violence and disturbing theme
Continuity: G1 ( will I ever write something else than G1, I wonder?)
Warning for this chapter: Mention of violence, mention of non-con (rape), mention of Mpreg, cross-faction pairings. Some nerdy stuff and mildly disturbing things.
Pairings: Megatron/Starscream, Megatron/Soundwave, Ratchet/Starscream, Optimus/Starscream, Skyfire/Starscream.
Summary: The Autobot find Starscream, Covered in energon, bleached and traumatized. They can only accept his request for asylum. But how will his presence affect his new companions and those who care about him more than they should?
I just wanted to tell you...
Part 1: Unexpected, energon-covered visit.
It doesn't hurt me.
You wanna feel how it feels?
You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?
You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?
You be running up that hill
You and me be running up that hill
( Song: Running up that hill/ Placebo/ Various artists)
ooOOooOOoo
It was a clear Spring day, the sky above the Ark was a pretty azure blue that could have made the laziest of bots want to go out for a walk.
But Wheeljack and Skyfire couldn't know that, for they had spend the whole morning from dawn on in the lab, working on experiments and tinkering with new prototypes.
“ Could you give me your opinion here, Skyfire?” Wheeljack asked, turning from the device he was working on and toward his scientist friend.
The bigger Autobot didn't acknowledge him, too focused he was on his own project, a culture of sort.
Skyfire might have looked like he was in deep concentration over his work, but Wheeljack knew him well enough to tell that the shuttle was resolutely absent, lost in his own little world. To pull him out of his reverie, the engineer extended a hand to gently pat the other scientist's arm. “ Skyfire? Are you with me?”
Skyfire blinked and finally glanced at his colleague. “ I'm sorry, what?” he croaked, his voice hoarse because he hadn't spoken much that day.
“ I have an hesitation here” Wheeljack explained, pointing at his half-finished work. “ Do you think I should increase the resistor using a single iron wire or two crossed aluminum ones on this? I would like for it to provide the system with a resistor of 45 ohms while not risking the device here to heat up exceedingly. Do you think a double wire would do? I'd rather not isolate it.”
Skyfire rubbed his face once and looked at what Wheeljack was showing him. “ To be honest, I have no idea, 'Jack. You know, I'm a xenobiologist, I don't know much about engineering.”
“ Oh...I'm sorry” Wheeljack said, looking a bit embarrassed. “ I thought you had electricity courses back at the University.”
“ I, indeed, got electricity courses in my general courses program, along with physics, chemistry and advanced mathematics, but they were all theoretical. In the third grade, we had the possibility to take practical electricity courses, but I chose an other option. Electricity wasn't very useful for the subject I chose, which is biology as you know.”
“ Okay....” Wheeljack went back to his trinket. “ never mind then, I'll work something out on my own.”
“ I know someone who took the practical electricity courses, though.” Skyfire added in afterthought, his expression suddenly bitter and dreamy at the same time, which looked weird, but very usual to the engineer.
Wheeljack put his tool down for a moment. “ I suppose I don't need to ask who you are talking about.”
For a klik, the shuttle's face brightened.
“ He was interested in everything you know” he told his friend “...If it had been up to him, he would have taken all the options proposed to us. Electricity, among other things, was a favorite of him...Do you know he designed many devices back then?”
As usual, whenever he spoke about him, Skyfire had that little bright light in his optics and a virtual glow to his face plates. Wheeljack, who was the closest to a friend to the shuttle-mech since he had joined their cause, couldn't help feeling sorry for him.
“ I know.” He replied. “ Word has reached my audios that he designed- and built- his null ray himself.”
“ I know that too...” Skyfire sighed, brutally reminded that his old friend had for long changed for the worst. “ I'm sure you would have liked him a lot back then.” he added, as to further hurt himself.
He had been asked, advised and prompted, times and times again, to forget about his old partner who had welcomed him back in his new life only to turn back on him, going so far as to try terminating him. But the memories from another time were still strong and fresh in his processor, six millions of years passing like nothing while he had been trapped in the ice, blissfully unaware of the tremendous changes his world had been subjected to.
His feelings hadn't changed either. It was nearly impossible for him to accept that the Starscream he had known was no more.
He still loved him as dearly as he did back then. The Autobots didn't know. He didn't have the spark to tell them, to make them pity him even more than they already did.
Wheeljack expelled air through his vents. “ Possibly.” he replied carefully. “ Skyfire...it's okay to remember, but you need to move on. The Starscream of old stayed in the past. The mech we know nowadays resemble nothing you told us about him.”
“ I can't believe that, Wheeljack” Skyfire shock his head. “ I'm sorry”
The engineer patted his friend's huge forearm gently. “ It will be alright, you'll move on you when you are ready.”
They were disturbed as the door to their lab opened and Prowl's head peaked in. “ I'm sorry to intrude” the Autobot second-in-command politely said. “ Optimus is requesting Skyfire's assistance for an emergency.”
“ Alright, I'm coming.” The shuttle former unfolded from his seat, nodded at Wheeljack and followed Prowl out. “ What does Optimus Prime need?” He inquired.
“ I don't have much information right now” Prowl supplied, looking slightly annoyed for he liked to have the complete control of any situation. The lack of information upset him. “ I only know he wants you to rejoin Jazz at these coordinates.” He sent said coordinates through data-burst. “ He said you have to get there as fast as you can.”
“ There's no time to lose then.” Skyfire stated, walking faster toward the exit.
Moments earlier:
“ Check that out, Sunstreaker!” Sideswipe shouted at his brother before speeding up on the road, his engine humming loudly as he increased in RPM.
“ Is that supposed to impress me?” Sunstreaker mocked him, catching up with his twin only a few seconds later. “ My opinion is that you overrated your new engine, again.”
“ Who said I pushed it to its full potential yet?” Sideswipe bluffed, trying to push some more energon through his injectors along with compressed air, to avoid a fatal slow-down.
The golden Lamborghini next to him didn't buy it. Inwardly worried for his twin's connecting rod, as well as for his own chassis ( overheated engine's exhaust gas did leave a dirty mark on one's finish) he decided to play along anyway. “ Ok, ok...slow down, I can't follow you without overtaxing my own engines...They are rather dear to me so I would hate to break 'em.”
That did it quite nicely. Sideswipe immediately slowed down. “ I told you”, he boosted. “I'm the fastest now!” The red front-liner was secretly relieved to be able to cold down, he had almost broken something there. A flash of light suddenly blinded him temporarily and he looked up- as much as he could in his alt-mode- noticing something shiny in between the trees bordering the road .
“ Hey, Sunny, you saw that?” He asked.
“ Saw what, now?”
“ In the trees, some kind of light...Or maybe something reflecting light. You want to go get a better look?”
“ We might as well.” Sunstreaker huffed. “ Since we are supposed to be on patrol here.”
They hit their brake and turned around in a perfect example of synchronized coordination, driving back to where Sideswipe had seen the oddity. They returned to their bi-pedal mode as soon as they reached the spot.
“ Oooh lookie!” Sideswipe almost squealed, not believing his luck.
There, on the ground among broken tree branches, they found a crashed Seeker.
He was in a really bad shape too, the mech was covered in his own energon.
“ Now that's exactly what I wanted for my creation day, 'Sides. Too bad it isn't my creation day...” Sunstreaker approached the immobile Decepticon carefully, poked him in the aft with the tip of his gun and, as the mech didn't move at all, kneed next to him.
“ Is he dead yet?” Sideswipe inquired, kneeling next to his brother to check the seeker out. He extended a hand and bent the flier's already damaged wing some more. A faint groan of pain escaped the mech's vocalizer, but aside from that, there was no reaction. The mech didn't even move.
“ Apparently, he's still alive...But if you want my opinion, he won't be for long.” Sunstreaker said, grinning.
“ Then maybe we should finish him off now?” Sideswipe pulled his own gun and pressed it against the Decepticon's helmet.
“ Wait, I'll turn him over, I want to see his face when you kill him.” The golden twin did just that.
“ oh Yesss! Jackpot!” Sideswipe now really squealed. “ It's the Screamer himself.”
Starscream couldn't see them, his optics were black, he had obviously drifted into unconsciousness. His dark face was perhaps the only perfectly recognizable part of him, the rest was bleached, with the exception of the purple symbol on his wing. There remained hint of red on his chest and pelvis, but for the rest, he looked like any other generic-gunmetal grey seeker, any generic- and too damaged to survive- seeker.
“ Ooh! This is too precious!” Sunstreaker stroked a grey cheek lovingly. “ The infamous Air commander Starscream offered to us, so vulnerable, so close to termination...See, Screamer,” He addressed the unaware mech,
“ We're not cruel like you, we'll grant you a quick, painless death. We'll stop your suffering and then you'll never torment anyone ever again.” he was aware of how creepy he sounded, but he despised the seeker with all his spark.
He might be an Autobot, this was still a war, Starscream was their greatest enemy's second-in-command: his termination would give the Autobots a big advantage in the war against Megatron.
Sideswipe adjusted his gun against the Decepticon's head more firmly and started pulling the trigger...
“ Sinstreaker? Sideswipe? Is it you over there?'” An accented voice suddenly startled them.
They turned toward its source to see Jazz standing in root mode on the road not far from them. “ You were supposed to report every groon, guys! Are you taking this patrol seriously or just doin' your usual shit?” The third-in-command berated them, his hands casually resting on his hips. “ What are you doin' there anyway?” He leaned on the side in an attempt to better see what they were up to. “ You are playing hide n' seek?”
“ Come see for yourself, Jazz, you'll like it!” Sideswipe hailed him over.
Curious, the Porsche walked to them and saw what they were busy with. “ Fragging-creation-of-a-petro-glitch!” He exclaimed. “ That's Starscream? You snuffed him?”
“ We found him like that.” Sunstreaker explained. “ He's still alive, though.”
“ He won't be for long if we leave him here.” Jazz mused out loud. “ I'll call Prime, I bet that'll make his day!”
Back in the present time
Dread filled Skyfire's processor as he approached the given coordinates. He couldn't see the scene very well from his position in the sky, but it clearly was a winged mech lying in his own energon down there.
He landed a few dozen of meters away from where Sunstreaker, Sideswipe and Jazz stood around the damaged Decepticon.
“ Good you came here fast, 'Fire!” Jazz came to him. “ We have kind of a situation here. Open your cargo hold, we've got slag to get back to Optimus.”
“ Who is it?” Skyfire asked, trying to hide his worry. Please let it not be..
“ Just Megsy's second-in-command, in a pretty bad shape too...Found him on the side of the road.” Sideswipe said, holding the Decepticon with Sunstreaker's help. They placed him inside of Skyfire, carefully enough so he wouldn't offline before they got him to Optimus Prime.
The shuttle-former felt his spark constrict painfully in his chest. But he couldn't let them know how affected he was by the event. “ Push him a bit forward and to the left” He requested. “...I can extend one of my energon line from there...Hook him to it, so we have more chance to keep him online.”
They did as instructed. When everybody was secured in his cargo hold, he didn't wait any longer to take flight.
Don't die on my, Starscream, please. He pleaded silently. I will not stand it if you die.
Three tense breems later, they were at the Ark, Optimus Prime and Ratched already there, waiting for them.
As soon as everyone was out of his hold, Skyfire transformed and cradled Starscream in his arms. “ I'll bring him to medbay” He informed Optimus. “ He's too heavy for any of you.”
Optimus Prime wanted to precise that he was strong enough to carry the seeker himself, but it really wasn't the moment to argue. He and Ratchet followed the shuttle inside, stumbling to do so, for Skyfire was almost running.
On the hall, they passed a very shocked Red-alert and a mildly displeased Prowl who followed them suit.
“ A word, Prime!” Prowl requested as they finally reached Ratchet's domain. “ I hope this Decepticon is heading straight for the brig.”
“ We need to reinforce the security of the brig at once!” Red alert was already panicking at the thought of having a Decepticon within their base. “ I need to tell Grapple and Hoist, have them built an extra wall or something.”
“ Calm down, please, Prowl, Red!” Optimus sighed tiredly. “ Starscream is no threat to us for the time being.” He then leaned in to lower his voice so no one else than them could hear what he was going to say. “ We're not even certain he'll survive...”
“ Alright.” Prowl said, regaining his composure. “ But if Ratchet brings him back to a fully functional state, I request him to be placed in the brig, under high surveillance.”
“ And I request the brig's security systems to be reinforced!” Red alert added. “ With your permission, I'll ask Wheeljack to enhance the force field, then I'll ask Grapple to built a second wall in front of the external one!”
Optimus Prime glanced toward the medical bench where Skyfire had deposed the Decepticon with utmost care.
“ For now,” Optimus Prime explained to reassure his mechs. “ I'll ask Ratched to stabilize him enough so he'd no longer risk offlining on us. Then we'll see that he regain consciousness and, depending on the explanations he'll give us, we'll take the necessary actions.”
“ That sounds reasonable” Prowl nodded. “ You understand, he's a liability. A great one too, we can't take any risk while having him inside of our base”
“ I know, Prowl” Optimus sighed again, looking at the seeker with a strange expression on his face. “ I know.”
OOOoooooOOOoooooOOO
Ratchet cursed loudly when he saw the damage to the seeker's frame and shoved everybody out of his medbay quite rudely, even a protesting Prime and a fretting Skyfire.
“ I have your orders, Optimus.” The medic said.” I'll follow them! Now out!”
“ Ratchet, please allow me to stay!” Skyfire pleaded.
“ No! Out! I'll inform you of his whereabouts when I'm done!”
Finally alone with his patient, the doctor got down to work in the tranquility of his now-deserted medbay.
He cursed at lot at first, because of the mess the seeker presented. He calmed down quickly enough, though, upon discovery that Starscream's wounds were not as deep or as function-threatening as they looked.
His cockpit was shattered, but the components inside were mostly undamaged, the flier's spark still protected under layers of armor. His whole frame had been bleached by what was probably a strong solvent, the metal was raw but the sensors didn't seem affected. As for his wings, they were bent at an angle, but still whole. Only a few sensors and relays needed replacement but his main flight gears were perfectly fine.
As for the dried up energon he was covered in, it was unprocessed energon. For all Ratchet knew, Starscream might as well have spilled his drink all over him...
The damage to the wings had obviously been caused by the crash in the wood, Ratchet deduced upon finding pine needles in the seeker's wing joints. The damage to the cockpit probably was too, but he couldn't be sure...There were hint of black paint on what was left of the glass, it might be another mech's fist mark.
Ratchet rubbed his own helmet and frowned. A simple punch in the cockpit, as painful as it may have been, couldn't be enough to knock a seeker from the sky, and certainly not a seeker like Starscream.
Something here was just not right. The medic now suspected the Air commander to be faking it.
He took hold of the seeker's shoulder protrusions and shock him rudely. “ I know you are not dying!” He said. The seeker was restrained and disarmed, effectively harmless. The medic risked nothing waking him up. “ Wake up already” he growled.
On cue, the seeker powered his optics. He blinked in confusion, just as if he had really been out of it, and finally turned his head toward Ratchet slowly.
The genuine fear the doctor saw in those optics made him regret his impulsive nature.
“ Please” The seeker whispered, his fearful eyes turning desperate. “ Please don't send me back!”
Ratchet stood there astonished. The Air commander, pleading? What kind of trick was that?
Starscream freed one of his arm from his belt-like-restrains and grabbed the doctor's forearm weakly. Ratchet flinched away but what the seeker said, then, made him froze on the spot. “ Don't send me back to Megatron, I'll do anything...please...just don't send me back to him...Or he'll kill me!”
Starscream's hand on his arm trembled as he tried to get a better grip on him.
There was so much pain and fear in his eyes. At the way he was looking at him, so sadly, so pleadingly...Ratchet didn't have the spark to shove him away. “ What did Megatron do to you?” he asked softly, almost forgetting what kind of mech he was talking to.
The seeker looked away from him, a new feeling crossed his eyes, Ratchet clearly recognized shame. “ He...he...” Starscream tried without success.
“ He hurt you?” The medic supplied carefully, still talking like he would talk to a lost sparkling.
Starscream slowly nodded, offlining his optics. He seemed to regain a hold of himself then, because , when he talked again, something dark colored his voice. He let go of Ratchet's arm. “ You'll know it soon or later anyway.” He said, wanting to sound as if he couldn't care less. “ He raped me.”
Ratchet gulped, he could feel his spark sink a little at the seeker's falt admission. The medic felt genuinely sorry for him and angry at the tyrant. How could a leader do that to his mechs, even for punishment.
“ You know...” Starscream's strength crumbled again. “ It wasn't the first time...But it was one time too many.” He broke down in front of Ratchet, moving a hand to his face to hide his tears as loud sobs escaped his throat. The medic didn't know what to do, so he bent down awkwardly over the medberth, unfastened the belts and gently held the seeker against him as he kept crying.
“ No one will make you go back to the Decepticons if you don't want to” He told Starscream, hoping that would reassure him a little. He called Optimus, making sure to warn him he'd better come alone.
Starscream straightened himself up a little but only so he could hold Ratchet tighter. He buried his head into the medic's neck and squeezed him against his broken canopy. “ Please!” He whispered between- now calmer- sobs. “ cover me up before your Prime comes in...I don't want to be seen like this.”
Ratchet understood that the seeker referred to his missing paint job.
“ I don't have paint here.” He explained. “ but I can provide you with a thermal blanket if you wish.”
Starscream leaned slightly away from him so he could look at his face. “ Yes, please.”
As he witnessed so much pain and sadness on the beautiful face, Ratchet's spark missed a pulse. A thought crossed his mind and, suddenly, he realized that he wanted to keep the mech in his arms forever. He could already feel himself fall for the mech and that shocked even him.
He refused to let go of the seeker as he reached out to grab a blanket, still hold him as best as he could as he wrapped Starscream up in the blanket, then held him still even if the seeker could no longer hold him back.
OooOOOOOoooOOOOOooo
Optimus Prime softly knocked on the still locked door of the medbay only moments later.
Reluctantly, Ratchet let go of Starscream. “ That must be Optimus. Do you feel ready to talk to him.” The seeker only nodded slowly, he clearly was apprehensive, which the medic could only understand.
Ratchet went to open the door, but only partially. “ You can come in in a minute.” he informed the prime. “He needs to talk to you. Be nice with him, though...He's been through a lot.”
Optimus blinked in surprise and confusion at that but eventually nodded. “ I'll try not to aggravate him, then.” he promised so Ratchet could finally allow him in.
The Autobot leader walked in and looked at the wrapped-up seeker who was moving to stand at his arrival. Optimus couldn't help smiling inwardly at the sight.
The fearless Decepticon looked almost cute like this.
Optimus approached with caution, aware- and displeased- that the seeker was unrestrained. “ So, Starscream, how are you feeling?”
Ratchet hurried to gently push the seeker back on the berth. “ Don't stand yet...You need to rest.”
“ I'll be fine. “ Starscream assured him, sliding down from the berth again. He wasn't crying anymore now but Optimus Prime noticed the strains on his face.
“ Ratchet mentioned that you needed to talk to me?” He encouraged the seeker.
“ Yes....I would be grateful if you accepted to grant me asylum.” Starscream re-adjusted the blanket around himself, not wanting for the Prime to see even an inch of his bleached body.
“ You want to defect from the Decepticons?” Optimus' surprise was clear on his face. “ Why?”
“ Because Megatron is worth slag as a leader and his lost sight of the cause he himself swore to defend. I no longer want to be involved with him or the Decepticons. I want this war to be over, I wish to help you defeat Megatron....And I want him to pay.” Starscream explained, anger and disgust painted his face as he mentioned his leader's name.
The Prime blinked, he'd never thought he'd hear those words from the Air commander.
“ But why defecting now? The war has lasted for millions of years! Why didn't you leave Megatron earlier?” Optimus Prime demanded, suspicious of the seeker still.
Ratchet placed a hand on his leader's arm. “ Remember what I told you. Be nice with him.” he warned.
Optimus glanced at him and lifted his brows. Everyone's behavior seemed decidedly strange today, he remarked for himself.
“ Because....In the past...I still had hope...I thought I could make him change.” Starscream looked down at the floor as he spoke. “ but since he made perfectly clear that I had no value outside of his berth...There's nothing more I can do to change him...but kill him. I have more chance to do so while being on your side.”
Now, the prime was shocked. Not sure if he heard that well, he asked: “ You and Megatron? You were together?”
Starscream quickly corrected him. “ Not in that sense. He has been using me for some time now...I'm not strong enough, in comparison to him, to fend him off when he has me cornered.” He admitted.
Optimus Prime felt suddenly very stupid, angry and embarrassed at the same time. “ I'm sorry to hear that, Starscream, know that....” But the seeker clearly wasn't finished.
“ Even sparked me up once...Then ripped the sparkling away from me and terminated it in front of me.” he gave away, his voice breaking at the last word.
“ I couldn't do anything...I was still recovering from the spark-splitting...I almost died too” He croaked out, his whole body shaking. Ratchet and Optimus were with him the next instant, close to him, each wanted to hold him.
“ Get off!” Ratchet growled at Optimus in a low voice, “ you are suffocating him!” He pulled Starscream into his arms and stroked his shoulder comfortingly.
The Prime was at a loss again, confused by Ratchet's possessive-aggressive behavior, weirder-out by Starscream's confession, angry and even more confused by the seeker's own behavior.
“ Alright” He said, backing off. “ I'll have a general meeting...To explain to everyone that Starscream will stay with us from now one...” he said, though no one heard him, except maybe Starscream.
OOOooooOOOooooOOO
It wasn't an easy task for Optimus Prime to get the Autobots to accept Starscream as a new member of their team. Most of them complained vehemently and/or angrily, Prowl and Red-alert among them, that a Decepticon had nothing to do with them.
A lot of Autobots demanded reasons for Starscream's sudden change of allegiance, Optimus only said that Starscream no longer shared Megatron's politics. He felt bad for lying to his mechs, but he also knew that Starscream would never forgive him if he told them the truth.
The explanation didn't convince many mechs, but they could only trust their leader on that.
Time passed...
Many among the bots still didn't trust the ex-Decepticon, but many others had come to know him better since the day he first arrived, battered, traumatized.
Although they didn't know the real motives behind the seeker's defection, they supposed he had gone through painful things. They had felt for him and accepted him for he he was now and were willing to forget what he used to be.
He had been completely repainted in his usual colors on the second day of his arrival. He had requested for the Decepticon insignias to remain on his wings, explaining that it was a way for him to never forget who branded them there.
Starscream, even though he was still not a true member of their team, behaved well. Ne never picked fight, not even when he was prompted to by the bots who liked to tease him about his origins. He knew they provoked him only to prove they were right to believe he was still a sparkless killer and that his true, monstrous nature would show itself if they pulled his wires the right way.
But he never indulged them. He remained calm and suffered the accusations and tease away with a few smiles.
He tried his best to be sociable around the base, but he could feel how unwelcome he really was sometimes, which made him wary in the other Autobots' presence.
So, most of these times, when he needed to go in the mess room to refuel, he just sat there and silently drank his energon while quietly listening to the others' conversations.
There were only an handful of mechs he felt comfortable with: Skyfire, with whom he had renewed their friendship, Wheeljack, with whom he shared the same passion for engineering and science, Ratchet, who was now more or less officially courting him...
And Optimus Prime, who he was visiting right now.
Prowl intercepted him before he could enter their leader's office though. “ I'm sorry, Starscream.” he said, still tensing automatically at the seeker's sight. “ Optimus is having a 'video conference' with Megatron.”
The Autobot second-in-command watched as the expression on the seeker's face shifted quickly from slightly annoyed to really apprehensive.
“ Don't worry, he won't sell you away...He'd never do that.” Prowl deemed necessary to reassure him.
Megatron had called several times during the past orns. And even if the warlord had no way to be sure that Starscream was with the Autobots, he kept trying to trade him back in exchange of cease-fire or energon. Optimus Prime denied the seeker's presence in his base every time Megatron called.
The warlord, obviously, remained suspicious.
Eventually, the door opened to a very tired-looking Optimus Prime. Prowl offered his leader a light smile in sympathy. “ So, what did he offer you this time?”
“ The insecticons.” Prime replied with a sigh. He noticed Starscream presence at last and his face immediately brightened. “ Starscream! How are you today?” He asked, a smile in his optics at the seeker's sight.
“ The insecticons? He wanted to give them to you, really?” Prowl was visibly amused.
“ Apparently yes.” Optimus Prime nodded. “ But I think he just want to get rid of them.”
“ Of course” Starscream interjected. “ They have always been a pain in his aft: Always hungry, never obedient, careless...They take no order from him, which- as you can imagine- doesn't please Megatron at all.”
“ Well, then I think I made the right choice not trading them for you.” The leader joked, which Starscream took good-humorously. “ You wanted to see me?”
“ Yes, even though I have nothing important to tell you...I guess I just wanted to visit you.” Starscream shrugged, smiling at him.
Prowl could see how this delighted his leader so he deduced this was the right time for him to leave them alone. He grumbled something about paperwork and left the room entirely.
“ Do you want to come in my office?” Optimus proposed. “ Or perhaps would you accept to share a drink with me, in the living room of my quarters?”
Starscream smirked at him, very much aware of the effect he had on the Autobot leader. “ If I didn't know you better, Prime, I'd believe you are proposing me a date.”
“ I wouldn't!” Optimus quickly spluttered. “ I know of your involvement with Ratchet.”
“ Ratchet might be courting me now,” Starscream corrected, “I want it to be clear that it doesn't mean I am involved with him, not yet at least. But, still, I'd appreciate a drink with you in your office.”
“ Well, that is an arrangement I am willing to make.” Prime said, a little disappointed that he didn't get to invite the seeker in his own sanctuary.”
They sat with their drinks in the Prime's office, each on one side of the large desk, professionally friendly.
“ I know I told you this before already.” Starscream said after a moment of companionable silence. “ but I'm ever grateful to you for accepting me in your base and offering me protection from my old master.”
“ There's no need to thank me” Prime said with a gesture of the hands, just happy to get to look at the ex-Decepicon everyday. “ My program doesn't allow me stand aside when someone is in danger. By all means, I couldn't let you return to him.” He didn't want to say Megatron's name in front of the seeker: It always made Starscream ill-at-ease whenever his ex-leader's name was mentioned.
“ My gratitude is all I can offer you though. I owe you still.” Starscream smiled sadly.
“ You already provided us with helpful information, you told us everything you knew about your old team...I think it is me owing you here, not the other way around.” Optimus moved his hand to take hold Starscream's own, he dared a lot, only doing this.
The seeker's gaze immediately drifted to the Prime's hand covering his. Slowly, almost carefully, he retracted his own hand. “ I'm sorry” He apologized. “ I still don't feel comfortable when being touched.”
Optimus wanted to slap himself for his lack of tact.
“ I understand, I apologize. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable.” He looked down sadly, taking his hand back.
Starscream took it back though, and held it. “ But it's ok when I'm the one who initiates the contact.” He smiled. “ I guess I'll heal with time.”
“ I know you will.” Prime said, uncharacteristically happy at the simple gesture. “ You are a strong mech.”
Starscream cleared his throat. “ So...Megatron still doesn't know I'm here, right.”
“ He suspects it, but I keep denying it. Don't worry, even if he finds out, you are safe here.”
“ I know, and I'm grateful for this. I hope the information I provided you with will prove helpful in the future.” Starscream smiled around the cube he brought to his lips.
“ So, Skyfire told me you renewed your old friendship?” Prime asked, wanting this conversation to last some more. He had come to enjoy the seeker's presence greatly and felt that he liked him a bit more every orn that passed. He already admired his looks and natural grace back when Starscream was still a Decepticon.
Defecting to the Autobots had made the seeker suddenly much more...approachable.
Of course, Optimus was aware that Ratchet also had feelings for the mech. He also knew that, if Starscream were to accept the medic's advances and got involved with him, Optimus Prime would accept it and stand aside.
He would never impose himself, just like he hadn't imposed himself when Elita One had told him she no longer had feelings for him. He understood, she loved someone else, he moved on.
“ Yes” Starscream said. “ I have resented him for leaving me but now I can only understand his choice. Now that we are basically on the same team again, I can no longer let old resentments get in the way of our friendship, Skyfire is a good mech, who wouldn't want to be his friend?”
“ Indeed.” Prime said, then they fell back into a comfortable silence, Starscream still holding the Autobot's hand.
They remained like this a moment longer, but then Optimus had to take care of his own duties, so Starscream took his leave.
OOOoooOOOoooOOO
Not having duties of his own to occupy himself, the seeker went to the medbay were he was almost certain to find Ratchet at any given time of the day.
Indeed, the medic was there, busy tidying up what he liked to call 'his domain'. He looked up at Starscream's arrival, greeting him with a sweet smile. When you buffed the grumpiness away, Starscream had discovered, the Autobot medic had a heart made of gold- as the humans said. He was nice, caring and very much aware of everyone's needs and interests.
He was nothing, Starscream mused, like the 'Hatchet' his fellow Decepticons used to joke about.
“ I hope I'm not disturbing you.” The seeker said, still standing at the door.
“ You should know it by now” Ratchet pulled him in gently. “ That you never disturb me!”
Starscream allowed his doctor to embrace him. “ Do you need help?” He proposed.
“ No, thank you...” Ratchet said. Then, he thought of something and added: “Well, if you really want to do something, my laser scalpel over there is not working...You can repair it if you wish.”
The seeker nodded with a smile and went to have a look at the broken tool. They worked in silence, Ratched cleaning up his medbay while Starscream tinkered.
“ Are you hungry?” The medic asked as he stowed his cleaning supplies away. Starscream had finished repairing his tool some time ago and had just been sitting there, watching him clean his stuff, ever since then.
“ Not really” Starscream said. “ I'm a bit tired, I think I will go to berth soon.”
“ Oh” Ratchet looked slightly dejected for a short moment. “ alright then...I guess I'll see you tomorrow.”
“ Of course.” Starscream smiled, walking to where the medic stood. He stopped right in front of him and took the tool Ratchet had in his hand. “ By the way...I wanted to tell you how grateful I am for everything you did for me.”
The seeker placed the tool somewhere behind him and took Ratchet's hands in his.
Ratchet looked at their joined hands. “ It's only natural, I could never let you go back to the Decepticons...I promised, remember?”
“ You did. I'm thankful you meant it.” The seeker whispered, leaning in.
Ratchet's spark fluttered in its casing and he felt like a youngling again as Starscream's lips touched his. He powered his optics off, wanting to enjoy and bask in the blissful moment for as long as it lasted.
It was over too soon. The seeker pulled away with a smile. “ I'll see you tomorrow, good night, Ratchet.”
“ Good night Starscream.” The doctor whispered back, a very happy smile of his own decorating his face plates.
oOoo~ooOOOoo~ooOo
TBC.
A/N: Thank you for reading, please leave a comment.