Do not open until January 1st.
A lot has changed in the past 364 days, both at home and at school. So for those of you that know bits and pieces... here are some more bits and pieces:
The biggest change is at school. Jack and I are no longer rooming together, I don't hate him, and I don't think he hates me, but in a lot of ways, this has to be better for both of us. Its unfortunate in a lot of ways, but I was a great deal happier at school this last semester than I ever have been at school. My new roommate is great, we hang out but have seperate friends as well as mutual friends. My new floor is great, Adrian (the guy accross the hall) reminds me a great deal of myself when I was a freshman, just a touch more socially awkward than I was. I like him a great deal, and don't want him to change as much as I have.
I have changed a lot. I've gotten a lot quieter, which disappoints me some. At school people don't ask questions the way they did in highschool, so i feel like no one at college knows me the way everyone did at BLS. Everyone talks about themselves but no one listens, and what is said is usually not very important anyway.
For everything that has gotten better at school, there is something that got worse at home. This summer hurt a lot socially. I gave up on someone who I had cared about and worked on and worked for for... years. I can't do it anymore though.And then there was the Thanksgiving fiasco. The one that everyone knows something about and the one that hurt more, that I don't think anyone caught.
In 2004 I fell out of love with Genevieve. And it hurt. Things are not as good with her as they could be. As they should be. But they are better than they have been in the past. Jess told me this year that the reason we work is because we've accepted each others strengths and flaws. I don't think Genevieve and I have done that with each other yet. Part of me thinks we never will.
I'm sick of drama. I'm sick of games. I half gave up on girls this year. Being attractive and confident (even if that means being a shithead) is appartently more important than being trustworthy, intellegent, caring, funny... me. I find it stupid. I refuse to change the basis of who I am, even if it means being lonely.
I don't feel like I'm actually close with almost anyone. I turned 21. I turned down sex twice (the first time is a fun story to tell, the second is not). I've been 10 months without a sober kiss. I've been over a year since a relationship. I pulled the best prank I ever could. I founded another improv troupe that is flourishing. I got turned down. I forgot two nights on account of alcohol. I didn't cut myself. I fell after one punch. I played matchmaker. I tried to be there for you at all times.
2004 was lonely. 2004 was intraspective. 2004 was nervous. 2004 was hopeful. 2004 was crushing. 2004 is over.
2004 is over.
The biggest change is at school. Jack and I are no longer rooming together, I don't hate him, and I don't think he hates me, but in a lot of ways, this has to be better for both of us. Its unfortunate in a lot of ways, but I was a great deal happier at school this last semester than I ever have been at school. My new roommate is great, we hang out but have seperate friends as well as mutual friends. My new floor is great, Adrian (the guy accross the hall) reminds me a great deal of myself when I was a freshman, just a touch more socially awkward than I was. I like him a great deal, and don't want him to change as much as I have.
I have changed a lot. I've gotten a lot quieter, which disappoints me some. At school people don't ask questions the way they did in highschool, so i feel like no one at college knows me the way everyone did at BLS. Everyone talks about themselves but no one listens, and what is said is usually not very important anyway.
For everything that has gotten better at school, there is something that got worse at home. This summer hurt a lot socially. I gave up on someone who I had cared about and worked on and worked for for... years. I can't do it anymore though.And then there was the Thanksgiving fiasco. The one that everyone knows something about and the one that hurt more, that I don't think anyone caught.
In 2004 I fell out of love with Genevieve. And it hurt. Things are not as good with her as they could be. As they should be. But they are better than they have been in the past. Jess told me this year that the reason we work is because we've accepted each others strengths and flaws. I don't think Genevieve and I have done that with each other yet. Part of me thinks we never will.
I'm sick of drama. I'm sick of games. I half gave up on girls this year. Being attractive and confident (even if that means being a shithead) is appartently more important than being trustworthy, intellegent, caring, funny... me. I find it stupid. I refuse to change the basis of who I am, even if it means being lonely.
I don't feel like I'm actually close with almost anyone. I turned 21. I turned down sex twice (the first time is a fun story to tell, the second is not). I've been 10 months without a sober kiss. I've been over a year since a relationship. I pulled the best prank I ever could. I founded another improv troupe that is flourishing. I got turned down. I forgot two nights on account of alcohol. I didn't cut myself. I fell after one punch. I played matchmaker. I tried to be there for you at all times.
2004 was lonely. 2004 was intraspective. 2004 was nervous. 2004 was hopeful. 2004 was crushing. 2004 is over.
2004 is over.