been a while
a lot of things have changed since the last post. I spoke of a certain someone and we met again about a month after that post. It was great to see you and spend time with you again. This time, even though we had to deal with the oddness of the situation, I feel like I had that closure. I'm not saying the feeling all of a sudden went away, but it definitely helped heal my heart. That one last night when we kissed, we both knew things were different. We both kind of accepted the reality finally. The worst part of everything is we were always on the same page, even after we broke up. Even to this day we both srtuggle with the same things and find joy in the same things. The reality hit us that we will never be okay with the situation and that those closest to us needed us most. I love talking to you and I love the thought of us being able to stay good friends, but what happens when one of us falls in love with someone else. Will it hurt to know that we will never get that chance again or will it finally set us free? I know that this question may never be answered, but I still wonder what is to come of the future.
on another note- I had a great weekend with some UE people.
My illness is finally starting to let me get back to normal, so that is a good feeling. If you didn't know, about two months ago I became ill with a very common thing, that turned into a very serious thing. My cronic sinus and ear infections turned into my immune system basically shutting down. The antibiotics I was on probably actually made things worse, but by the time we realized what was going on, it was already over a month late. I was suseptable to basically anything that came my way and luckily it didn't get any worse than it did. I finally figured out about two weeks ago what was causing my body to shut down. I had contracted a staph infection and it just took over my body, but what I was unaware of was the thing that almost made everything ten times worse.
Just over 3 weeks ago, I was given a differnt antibiotic for the sinus infection that never went away and come to find out I was allergic to that antibitotic, so the staph that was already in my blood by this time, had more and more rein over my body. The allergic reaction to the antibiotic for my sinus infection didn't actually become visible until after I found out that I had the staph. This medicine I ended up being allergic to was the best treatment for staph so they figured it would cure it and kept me on it. Well needless to say it did not cure it. The reaction to the medicine actually inhibited my body from properly using the antibiotic. So all this time my body is getting weaker and weaker everyday from the antibiotic and my blood was becoming more and more contaminated with the infection. It got to the point were I was in the doctors office everyday, sometimes more than once. Just these past couple days have I felt like I'm getting my body back. I am not as tired as I have been and the allergy shit is getting better. I know I am still sick and I have to watch what I do, but I finally feel somewhat normal again. I seriously thought I was going to have to withdraw from school, but if things keep going in the right direction I may actually be able to graduate in December.
If I do graduate this semester, I will get a job for about six months and then depart for the Peace Corps in July. Things with PC have really been put on hold though because of the health issues. So hopefully I'm still a canidate, I really hope this illness didn't fuck up my chances with the PC. I had to get dental and eye check ups and pass a physical, but I'm pretty sure you all know now that the physical part didn't clear, lol.
Anyways, this has been my life lately. I just felt like updating, so I'm outta here for now.
on another note- I had a great weekend with some UE people.
My illness is finally starting to let me get back to normal, so that is a good feeling. If you didn't know, about two months ago I became ill with a very common thing, that turned into a very serious thing. My cronic sinus and ear infections turned into my immune system basically shutting down. The antibiotics I was on probably actually made things worse, but by the time we realized what was going on, it was already over a month late. I was suseptable to basically anything that came my way and luckily it didn't get any worse than it did. I finally figured out about two weeks ago what was causing my body to shut down. I had contracted a staph infection and it just took over my body, but what I was unaware of was the thing that almost made everything ten times worse.
Just over 3 weeks ago, I was given a differnt antibiotic for the sinus infection that never went away and come to find out I was allergic to that antibitotic, so the staph that was already in my blood by this time, had more and more rein over my body. The allergic reaction to the antibiotic for my sinus infection didn't actually become visible until after I found out that I had the staph. This medicine I ended up being allergic to was the best treatment for staph so they figured it would cure it and kept me on it. Well needless to say it did not cure it. The reaction to the medicine actually inhibited my body from properly using the antibiotic. So all this time my body is getting weaker and weaker everyday from the antibiotic and my blood was becoming more and more contaminated with the infection. It got to the point were I was in the doctors office everyday, sometimes more than once. Just these past couple days have I felt like I'm getting my body back. I am not as tired as I have been and the allergy shit is getting better. I know I am still sick and I have to watch what I do, but I finally feel somewhat normal again. I seriously thought I was going to have to withdraw from school, but if things keep going in the right direction I may actually be able to graduate in December.
If I do graduate this semester, I will get a job for about six months and then depart for the Peace Corps in July. Things with PC have really been put on hold though because of the health issues. So hopefully I'm still a canidate, I really hope this illness didn't fuck up my chances with the PC. I had to get dental and eye check ups and pass a physical, but I'm pretty sure you all know now that the physical part didn't clear, lol.
Anyways, this has been my life lately. I just felt like updating, so I'm outta here for now.