I think maybe I'm not a good person.

[crazy_v_chan]

A friend of mine just got married. She was one of my bestfriends and we used to be roomates. I was around when she meet her furture husband and I supported her the best I could even after she moved out. I saw her a couple of times and it was just like the same. But  I guess we just lost touch and I used to leave her messages on her myspace that I wanted to see her get married and attend her wedding. I mean, we always said we'd be each other's maid of honor but that didn't happen. I understood, it wasn't a big deal but I at least wanted to see her walk down the ile. I guess something happened between us that I'm not aware of and her opinion of me changed. I don't know what it was. Mine of her never changed, So I'm not sure what happened. I used to call her on holidays and her birthday to say I was thinking about her and to give her well wishes. Maybe that's strange, but we were so close I didn't think it would've been. I heard through the grape vine that she was warning friends off of me. Telling them that I was crazy but I didn't believe that because.....I didn't have any idea why she would say that.

But I guess in the end it's true. I guess somewhere along the lines of us not seeing each other something was said that I don't know about. I happen to be clearing out my inbox and I noticed that she had a wedding photo up and she looks so beautiful. I wanted to congratulate her but it seems she has blocked me and removed me from her friends list. I know it's really stupid but it hurts my feelings that I have no idea what happened. I don't have alot of close friends and when one stops talking to me suddenly without me knowing why it just makes me think that.

Maybe I'm just not a good person and I hurt people and I don't even know it. I know it's really stupid but I'm crying over it.