Everything I needed to know about NASCAR
So I just watched about 30 seconds of a NASCAR pre-game ceremony and now know all I need to know about the "sport".
It started with a Christian prayer... "Thank you Jesus for this auto race" more or less. Then there was this choir of off-key schoolchildren to sing the national anthem very badly, and the people in the stands (all 150,000 of them) held up little cardboard things to form a gigantic American flag when seen from the Goodyear Blimp, the flag surrounding the infield which was crammed with winnebegos.
All the while the kids were straining to get within an octive of the right notes, they were showing all these serious looking military types saluting the flag and shedding tears for their country as fireworks exploded dangerously overhead.
Then I checked what the thing was called and it was perfect: I was watching the Sharpie 500.
It started with a Christian prayer... "Thank you Jesus for this auto race" more or less. Then there was this choir of off-key schoolchildren to sing the national anthem very badly, and the people in the stands (all 150,000 of them) held up little cardboard things to form a gigantic American flag when seen from the Goodyear Blimp, the flag surrounding the infield which was crammed with winnebegos.
All the while the kids were straining to get within an octive of the right notes, they were showing all these serious looking military types saluting the flag and shedding tears for their country as fireworks exploded dangerously overhead.
Then I checked what the thing was called and it was perfect: I was watching the Sharpie 500.