(no subject)
The day was fresh, and Merrick could smell in the air something new, something vibrant, something…something he had been waiting for. For a long, long time.
“Grunt, …was something going to happen today?” Commander Litch addressed Black as grunt due to their horrendous breakup the last month, Black had tricked poor Merrick into dating him, and had ridden his coattails all the way up to co-commanding the squad, a job he wasn’t right for at all, Merrick was currently looking into ways to transfer him out to latrine duty in some other squad, a much more fitting position.
The wind brought that scent again to Merrick as he left his tent, and the beutifull redhead stopped, his breath stolen by the sight before him, there was a man he had seen only in his dreams.
“Hello, I’m the new co-commanding officer, my name is Robert“
Bobby wondered if there could have been a worse way to get what really, he earned a long time ago. I mean, who deserved to meet Merrick (and…uhg, Andy) more than him? He, who had devoted time and fanfic and fanart (to a lesser extent) all about the redheaded god he had been assured an audience with…should he complete one little task.
“Mmmmiiiddnnnyyyttt?” Bobby said from under the desk and around the mouthful of cock he was sporting.
“You’ll know when you’re done” Anarchy replied with a grin.
“All right, is everyone ready?” The pudgy boy couldn’t keep the glee off of his face; he was finally going to make sure everyone knew who the biggest Nym Stewert fan was! And this would all happen in front of the man himself!
“Loins of Love, why do I have to play Ann Archy? This suck, I wanted to be Merrick Litch.” A somewhat tall, lanky boy by the name of Molech whined. He had the color of someone with constant sunburn, and eyes a bit too big for his face. Bobby shook his head in a simple sigh.
“We can’t act out my scenes without the villain, can we?”
“Well, no but-”
“And let’s face it, I think that only one person here can truly catch the whirlwind of romance and passion that is Merrick Litch” He pointed clearly at himself
“Yah, youff read hish ficsh, he KNOWSH Merrick, inshide an out” Spittle came from Ezras mouth as he defended his favorite fanficcer.
“But…but he’s playing Robert already, he’s just holding a broom with a drawing of what he thinks Merrick looks like taped to it and gonna talk for it!”
“Thash cush he cn captshure tthhe real angsht tthhey have”
“Come on Molech, we’ve had this planned for three weeks, you should have said something before, but right now we need to go in there and say the lines we’ve been practicing and prove we are the best fans ever!” Bobby headed toword the door to the book signing, ignoring pleas that Molech had complained before now, when a hand suddenly stopped them.
Gidget knew there would be trouble when he saw the kids outside. He knew that they had no good reason to be dressed up like the characters in Nyms books unless they were going to come in. And if they came in, they would… be….weird.
And of course Nym would smile, and nod, and pay attention to whatever crap they were trying to pull. And if they had been normal fans, Gidget would have let them by, after all, he learned to put up with their crap a long time ago. But these kids…these kids dressed up like the characters, these kids with a broom with a paper with an almost porny picture of a redhead on it. He could not deal with this, he could not deal with Nym smiling and nodding and encouraging this. So he held out his hands, stopping the leader, and trying not to pay attention to the one clearly dressed up as him.
Bobby smiled “Hi can we-”
“No”
“but we just want to”
“No”
“If w could just see Mr. Stewert for just a-”
“No”
There was dead silence as the Leader and the redhead stared at each other. Finaly, the pudgriffic boy turned and said “well..uh…I guess Mr Stewert is busy today…we’ll try again tomorrow!” saying the last part with a big grin.
Gidget made a mental note, cancel Nyms book signing tomorrow.
“And the teacher sends home a note with Andria asking if we want to sign her up for preliminary sex ed!” Jenny sighed as Zeke was once again throwing a fit about the big bad world, and how things were different in his day, and how his daughter was growing up in a society that should get its morals right and keep its hands off his little girl.
“I mean really, she’s nine! And they want her learning about sex!” The mohawked man spewed his rage from across the coffee table at his friend who simply rolled her eyes and took a sip as he continued on.
“It’s bad enough she’s started using the internet and we haven’t been able to afford that stupid child lock program, because somehow, whenever I’m not at home, she manages to get onto something inappropriate, she almost found a sesame street website the other day!” Jenny couldn’t help but sign into her coffee, splashing a little up into her face, she hoped she wasn’t in for another round of his complaints of child brainwashing that happened at least once every two months since Sesame Street had outed Bert and Ernie.
“Not to mention, it turns out the sex ed teacher is a faggot himself, he’s going to be telling my daughter it’s better to have fake lesbian sex then normal healthy-”
“So you’re saying you want her to go have heterosexual sex?” Jenny interrupted, knowing by now which rants were more tolerable than others.
“NO! No god damn horn dog is touching my little girl as long as-” He continued that way, and Jenny wondered if it was really worth the 50 bucks his wife had paid her to distract Zeke for a day while Andria took sex ed.