Crazy in Love by shaggydogstail (PG-13)
Fandom: DOCTOR WHO
Pairing: Doctor/Master
Length: 10,500ish words
Author on LJ: shaggydogstail
Author Website: shaggydogstales
Why this must be read:
Because this story LITERALLY had me rolling on the floor laughing. I'm not kidding, I fell out of my chair laughing. I HURT myself laughing from this story. This story is guaranteed to increase your joy, happiness, and willingness to participate in monomaniacal plans for world domination. Instead of refusing to regenerate, the Master is imprisoned by the Doctor on the TARDIS (wait, I've read this story before...), but unlike every other story with this basic premise that I've read, there is no angst. This is ridiculously funny. The author has an amazing style of writing that had me in stitches the entire time I was reading it. YOU MUST READ THIS STORY.
‘Can - oh, this is ridiculous,’ said the Master. ‘Why do you think I’m incapable of love?’
‘Because you’re a crazed, murdering, power-mad, vindictive evil little psychopath,’ said the Doctor matter-of-factly.
‘So?’
‘You can’t have love and evil at the same time, that’s just silly,’ said the Doctor. ‘Unless you’ve decided to stop being evil?’ he added hopefully.
‘I don’t see why not,’ said the Master. ‘Love is cruel, tempestuous and heartbreaking. It’s practically an anagram of evil.’
‘It’s an anagram of evol,’ said the Doctor, ‘which isn’t even a word, not matter what anyone on the internet says.’
‘Pedant.’
‘Oh, for goodness sake!’ The Doctor threw his hands up in exasperation. ‘Are you seriously trying to tell me that you are actually, truly, straight-up and cards on the table, really in love with me?’
The Master sniffed. ‘Might be.’
‘But that doesn’t make any sense!’
‘Love so seldom does,’ said the Master philosophically.
‘I don’t believe you,’ said the Doctor. ‘You’re only doing this to wind me up. I expect it’s all part of some nefarious scheme of yours or other.’
Well, that was a bit too close to the truth (as in, dead on the money). The Master felt a slight change in tack was in order, to throw the Doctor off the scent.
‘I don’t see why you have to be so unreasonable about it,’ he said. ‘It’s all your fault anyway.’
‘I can’t help being adorable,’ said the Doctor defensively.
‘It’s not about you, you conceited big baby, it’s about me,’ said the Master. ‘You said yourself that I’m incapable of falling in love on my own, so obviously you’ve been brainwashing me.’
‘I - what?’
‘Oh, don’t look so innocent,’ continued the Master. ‘You just bloody love having everyone in love with you, don’t you? But having all your poor little loyal human companions pining for you wasn’t enough, you had to go and ensnare me as well.’
‘I didn’t ensnare you.’
‘So I’m free to leave, am I?’
‘No, but that’s because I don’t want you destroying the universe, not because I want you making googly eyes at me over the cornflakes.’
The Master ignored him.
‘I’ve read all about how kidnappers manipulate their captives by making them fall for them,’ he continued. ‘You’ve given me Stockholm Syndrome.’
Crazy in Love: A Case Study of Factitious Disorders and Relationship Breakdown in Gallifreyan Males by shaggydogstail
Pairing: Doctor/Master
Length: 10,500ish words
Author on LJ: shaggydogstail
Author Website: shaggydogstales
Why this must be read:
Because this story LITERALLY had me rolling on the floor laughing. I'm not kidding, I fell out of my chair laughing. I HURT myself laughing from this story. This story is guaranteed to increase your joy, happiness, and willingness to participate in monomaniacal plans for world domination. Instead of refusing to regenerate, the Master is imprisoned by the Doctor on the TARDIS (wait, I've read this story before...), but unlike every other story with this basic premise that I've read, there is no angst. This is ridiculously funny. The author has an amazing style of writing that had me in stitches the entire time I was reading it. YOU MUST READ THIS STORY.
‘Can - oh, this is ridiculous,’ said the Master. ‘Why do you think I’m incapable of love?’
‘Because you’re a crazed, murdering, power-mad, vindictive evil little psychopath,’ said the Doctor matter-of-factly.
‘So?’
‘You can’t have love and evil at the same time, that’s just silly,’ said the Doctor. ‘Unless you’ve decided to stop being evil?’ he added hopefully.
‘I don’t see why not,’ said the Master. ‘Love is cruel, tempestuous and heartbreaking. It’s practically an anagram of evil.’
‘It’s an anagram of evol,’ said the Doctor, ‘which isn’t even a word, not matter what anyone on the internet says.’
‘Pedant.’
‘Oh, for goodness sake!’ The Doctor threw his hands up in exasperation. ‘Are you seriously trying to tell me that you are actually, truly, straight-up and cards on the table, really in love with me?’
The Master sniffed. ‘Might be.’
‘But that doesn’t make any sense!’
‘Love so seldom does,’ said the Master philosophically.
‘I don’t believe you,’ said the Doctor. ‘You’re only doing this to wind me up. I expect it’s all part of some nefarious scheme of yours or other.’
Well, that was a bit too close to the truth (as in, dead on the money). The Master felt a slight change in tack was in order, to throw the Doctor off the scent.
‘I don’t see why you have to be so unreasonable about it,’ he said. ‘It’s all your fault anyway.’
‘I can’t help being adorable,’ said the Doctor defensively.
‘It’s not about you, you conceited big baby, it’s about me,’ said the Master. ‘You said yourself that I’m incapable of falling in love on my own, so obviously you’ve been brainwashing me.’
‘I - what?’
‘Oh, don’t look so innocent,’ continued the Master. ‘You just bloody love having everyone in love with you, don’t you? But having all your poor little loyal human companions pining for you wasn’t enough, you had to go and ensnare me as well.’
‘I didn’t ensnare you.’
‘So I’m free to leave, am I?’
‘No, but that’s because I don’t want you destroying the universe, not because I want you making googly eyes at me over the cornflakes.’
The Master ignored him.
‘I’ve read all about how kidnappers manipulate their captives by making them fall for them,’ he continued. ‘You’ve given me Stockholm Syndrome.’
Crazy in Love: A Case Study of Factitious Disorders and Relationship Breakdown in Gallifreyan Males by shaggydogstail