wow, long time, no see.....
So, just listening to depressing music, and reflecting again. I don't exactly know how to write it, so I'm just gonna let it come out like rain...... I miss everything right now. I miss the feeling of being in love. I miss making my friends laugh. I miss being able to talk to someone late at night. I miss trying to impress even though I wouldn't need to. I miss good weather. I miss playing piano (I'm starting agian, and simply love sheet music!). I miss meeting new people. I miss change. I miss MY BEST FRIEND, most of all. I miss hangin with him, doin stupid shit. Sharing stories. Bitchin about how my life is rediculous. Hangin out with jack and passing out at eachother's houses. I don't know if it is the fact that I'm home and just doing the same shit i have been for the past few years. I don't like talking to his parents more than him. I don't like getting pissed because he's with his girlfriend more than me, and how she's like his number one priority now, because I'm really happy for him and he's definitely been waiting for someone to come around that makes him feel like he does. I try to look at it as a similar relationship to me and mal, and then, i feel like shit, cuz we ignored everyone else, and i definitely ignored pat. I just really don't like being the third wheel, prolly cuz im so used to being the first or second. We're all good friends, but there is an added ingredient when love comes into play. So, I don't know what else to say about that, just that I hope nobody is offended or anything, I just need to vent. I just have to realize that everyone's moving on, including me, and that things aren't going to be like they used to. I need to get out of this fucking place and find newer things, and newer people, but still hold on to those close to me, which is gonna be a bitch! Oh, and Im changing my major again, to anesthetics! Awesome pay, and good hours. I went to a career seminar today, and it was actually pretty cool! I gotta get to some homework soon though. I work too much. I school too much. I need to take a day and just sleep. Forrest OUT!