ugh...
oh god, life can be so difficult sometimes. Unfortunately i have had some problems with my friends lately but it's okay nothing too big. We just seem to be splitting into 2 groups me and anni vs. moriah and amy. It's not like we're mad at each other or anything, we just never have time to see each other anymore. and having totally different schedules doesnt help either. I dont want to lose my friends, seeing as how they are the only ones i have. i'm not like my other friends, like amy anni or moriah. i dont have friends outside of those that i see 5 days a week at school. all ties with my middle school friends have unfortunately been severed and i basically only have 4 friends which i consider my best friends, sometimes im afraid to say that in front of them because im afraid it will scare them away or they wont feel the same or something. so i act indifferent and pretend like i have a life outside of school, but i dont. i dont have any childhood friends that i've known since i was a baby or anything, just the people i hang out with at school, and the longest friendship i've ever had only lasted through middle school and wasnt even strong enough to handle the fact that we each had to go to different high schools. maybe that's why im so clingy...because my whole life i've had to fight for my friends in order to keep them....i'll never know.....my mind is an enigma....