19.2 My partner will always understand that I...
Patient: John Allerdyce / Pyro
Fandom:X-Men
Partners: Doug Ramsey doug_ramsey and Jean-Paul Beaubier tm_northstar
ooc: doug_ramsey used with permission. Backdated to Sat, July 2.
My partner will always understand that I… will love him, no matter what or no matter who happens.
John and Doug hadn't spent that much time together that week. No, wait, that wasn't true - they had, but JP had been there a lot of the time. Which was totally cool, neither of them minded, it was a new and exciting thing they were getting into.
Friday, JP and Doug had gone out together, alone, and John was pleasantly surprised to find he was cool with that. It might have been mostly because he had a previous engagement for work he had to go to, so he wasn't bothered by not being there, but he'd like to think that he was cool with all this. Things were settling. It was good.
Saturday, though, was for John and Doug. Just the two of them, hanging out. And it turned out to be very domestic; they shopped a bit for furniture and other stuff they needed for their new place. They picked up groceries. They went to the video store and John spent forty-five minutes listening to Doug talk excitedly about the new foreign film section they had, and let himself be dragged through all the aisles as Doug read the back of the movie cases in whatever language they happened to be written in, only to promptly translate it to English for him anyway.
They ended up getting Jumper, because JP wouldn't watch it with them.
They were stretched out on the couch, Doug settled in between John's legs, back rested up against John's chest. The side of John's face rested against Doug's head, and his arms held him tight around the waist.
About half way through the movie, John randomly said, "Don't forget I love you, okay?"
"Hmmm?" Doug said, his eyes very focused on Hayden Christianson.
"No, really," John said. "Don't leave me, okay?"
Doug stopped his staring, and paid more attention. "J?" he asked. He twisted around and looked up at him, frowning. "What are you talking about?"
There's something building up inside of John, suddenly. He's never felt anything like this before. It was like there was fire in his cheeks and ice in his heat and rocks in his stomach. He was short of breath, and his skin felt clammy.
He was scared.
John Allerdyce did not get scared.
Except for right now, apparently.
"What if I fucked things up?" he asked. He sounded like he was in a daze, as if drugged up and unable to work through his own conscious thoughts. He wasn't drugged up, but it was how he was feeling right now, not able to think clearly. It was all a jumble in his mind. "What if I shouldn't have let it happen? What if I have fucked things up for you and me?"
John swallowed, though it didn't help his dry throat.
"What if I've made you think I don't love you?"
Doug immediately flipped over, and climbed onto John's lap. He hands rested on John's cheeks, forcing him to look up into Doug's eyes.
"J., I don't think that," Doug said. "I promise."
John's voice dropped to a low, intense whisper as he gripped Doug's wrists. "Doug, no matter what happens, or with who, I'm never going to stop loving you."
"I know."
"No, really, I mean-"
"John, I know," Doug insisted, though his voice was soft and sweet. "I understand."
Doug used the same tactics on John as he did when John was upset or angry - gentle touches to the neck, over the shoulder, and around to the top of his back. His fingertips kneed softly over John's tense muscles. He kissed John, gentle and slow thoroughly. As usual, John tried to pick it up a notch, tried to kiss harder and more desperate, but Doug kept them at their pace.
And so John just focused on Doug, focused on kissing him, his hands having let go of his wrists and drifted softly to his waist.
The tension slipped out of John's body, and he relaxed. Only then did their kissing become more insistent, more hot and demanding, until both their bodies were tense but for a different reason.
They went to their room, and to their bed, and they made love. Their minds, and their hearts, were only focused on each other. It was real, and it was them, and it was great.
Afterwards, as the post-sex haze started to clear their room and their minds, they were in each others arms. Both were on the verge of sleep.
"J?" Doug asked, his eyes closed as his head rested on John's chest.
"Hmmm?" John ask.
"We see JP tomorrow?"
"Yeah."
"Mkay, good."
"Yeah. Doug?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"I know. Love you too."
"I know."
Fandom:X-Men
Partners: Doug Ramsey doug_ramsey and Jean-Paul Beaubier tm_northstar
ooc: doug_ramsey used with permission. Backdated to Sat, July 2.
My partner will always understand that I… will love him, no matter what or no matter who happens.
John and Doug hadn't spent that much time together that week. No, wait, that wasn't true - they had, but JP had been there a lot of the time. Which was totally cool, neither of them minded, it was a new and exciting thing they were getting into.
Friday, JP and Doug had gone out together, alone, and John was pleasantly surprised to find he was cool with that. It might have been mostly because he had a previous engagement for work he had to go to, so he wasn't bothered by not being there, but he'd like to think that he was cool with all this. Things were settling. It was good.
Saturday, though, was for John and Doug. Just the two of them, hanging out. And it turned out to be very domestic; they shopped a bit for furniture and other stuff they needed for their new place. They picked up groceries. They went to the video store and John spent forty-five minutes listening to Doug talk excitedly about the new foreign film section they had, and let himself be dragged through all the aisles as Doug read the back of the movie cases in whatever language they happened to be written in, only to promptly translate it to English for him anyway.
They ended up getting Jumper, because JP wouldn't watch it with them.
They were stretched out on the couch, Doug settled in between John's legs, back rested up against John's chest. The side of John's face rested against Doug's head, and his arms held him tight around the waist.
About half way through the movie, John randomly said, "Don't forget I love you, okay?"
"Hmmm?" Doug said, his eyes very focused on Hayden Christianson.
"No, really," John said. "Don't leave me, okay?"
Doug stopped his staring, and paid more attention. "J?" he asked. He twisted around and looked up at him, frowning. "What are you talking about?"
There's something building up inside of John, suddenly. He's never felt anything like this before. It was like there was fire in his cheeks and ice in his heat and rocks in his stomach. He was short of breath, and his skin felt clammy.
He was scared.
John Allerdyce did not get scared.
Except for right now, apparently.
"What if I fucked things up?" he asked. He sounded like he was in a daze, as if drugged up and unable to work through his own conscious thoughts. He wasn't drugged up, but it was how he was feeling right now, not able to think clearly. It was all a jumble in his mind. "What if I shouldn't have let it happen? What if I have fucked things up for you and me?"
John swallowed, though it didn't help his dry throat.
"What if I've made you think I don't love you?"
Doug immediately flipped over, and climbed onto John's lap. He hands rested on John's cheeks, forcing him to look up into Doug's eyes.
"J., I don't think that," Doug said. "I promise."
John's voice dropped to a low, intense whisper as he gripped Doug's wrists. "Doug, no matter what happens, or with who, I'm never going to stop loving you."
"I know."
"No, really, I mean-"
"John, I know," Doug insisted, though his voice was soft and sweet. "I understand."
Doug used the same tactics on John as he did when John was upset or angry - gentle touches to the neck, over the shoulder, and around to the top of his back. His fingertips kneed softly over John's tense muscles. He kissed John, gentle and slow thoroughly. As usual, John tried to pick it up a notch, tried to kiss harder and more desperate, but Doug kept them at their pace.
And so John just focused on Doug, focused on kissing him, his hands having let go of his wrists and drifted softly to his waist.
The tension slipped out of John's body, and he relaxed. Only then did their kissing become more insistent, more hot and demanding, until both their bodies were tense but for a different reason.
They went to their room, and to their bed, and they made love. Their minds, and their hearts, were only focused on each other. It was real, and it was them, and it was great.
Afterwards, as the post-sex haze started to clear their room and their minds, they were in each others arms. Both were on the verge of sleep.
"J?" Doug asked, his eyes closed as his head rested on John's chest.
"Hmmm?" John ask.
"We see JP tomorrow?"
"Yeah."
"Mkay, good."
"Yeah. Doug?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"I know. Love you too."
"I know."