Don't Stand So Close to Me (1/3)
Title: Don't Stand So Close to Me
Author: countingcr0ws
Beta: liltee_jycyj
Pairing/ Characters: Yunjae
Rating: PG
Form: Three-shot ( 1 | 2 | 3 )
Genre: AU, Plain Ridiculousness, Ridiculously Happy, Romance
Summary: High flying lawyer Jung Yunho exercises every inch of his straining self control to reign in his perverted thoughts of the young, beguiling intern that hurts his very dick and soul.
Inspired by: Don't Stand So Close to Me/ Young Girl by the Glee Cast, My job stint
The heck was this... Yunho picked the mug up for a closer inspection as he peered curiously at the cartoon characters printed around the porcelain.
There was a blonde lion, a cutesy tiger, a manly rabbit, a stupid looking sheep and a frowning deer.
Irritated, he rubbed at the weird lion with mild annoyance.
The temporary staff was soo weird.
He was sure he had seen Jaejoong staring stupidly at the mug in between work, and to be absolutely honest, the mug was downright juvenile, and completely typical of Jaejoong and his puerile interests...
"Eh, Yunho! What happened to your mug?"
Yunho jumped in shock when the owner of said cup suddenly appeared to catch him in his act.
The mug leapt out of his hand, and he watched it fall- falling slowly like in those movies with those expensive cameras that captured approximately a thousand million shots per nanosecond.
Noo... his hands reached out instinctively to catch the cup even though his mind was still reeling.
"My baby!" Jaejoong exclaimed as he reached out simultaneously to save his drinking utensil.
Both the man and the university student caught it at the same time before it connected fatally with the counter.
Gasping to himself loudly, he quickly retracted his hands in shock. Jaejoong's hands were like satin!
Watching the other fawn over the cup with the same googly eyes and the small pout that did weird things to him, he rubbed his scalded fingers behind his back dejectedly.
"Oh my babyshinki... I'm so sorry."
Yunho grimaced as the other apologized solemnly to the inanimate object as he watched the other polish the surface tenderly with his jacket sleeve as if it were some fucking magic lamp.
"Don't cry..." the other continued to coo at the mug, and Yunho was sure that he was on the verge of choking himself in frustration. Scratch that. He was on the verge of choking himself in frustration.
"I'm sorry, Jaejoong." He quickly took the first window of opportunity to apologize when the other stopped moaning for a short second.
Jaejoong didn't look up for a few moments (oh dear. Was the kid crying?) but when he did, a bright smile was plastered across his face and he was replied with a chirpy 'it's okay.'
Yunho nodded generally as he watched the other fill the weird mug with a little cold water, bringing it to his full lips slowly, letting it hover in mid-air for a thousand long beats before finally setting the cup down with a conflicted look on his face after the rim but ghosted his lips.
Yunho tugged at his tie nervously as he helped himself to the stale coffee just to engage himself, watching guiltily as Jaejoong finally emptied the mug the other left for his own desk with the empty vessel in his hands.
That was the last time he ever saw the mug- Jaejoong had a new mug in the office pantry the next day.
- - - - -
"Jaejoong!"
Yunho immediately looked up and out of the glass panel that separated his private office and the common staff the moment the other's name was called, to watch as Changmin, the Human Resource in-charge reached out to hit the student in the arm.
The lawyer had already shot out of his chair in a swift move, ready to stalk out and yell at his colleague when Jaejoong suddenly returned the violence with a resounding smack (that actually reached his private office).
Slowly replacing his butt onto the swivel chair heavily, utterly dumbfounded and completely floored, Yunho tugged at his silk tie awkwardly.
What had just happened?
What black magic had he just witnessed? He stared at his papers, the black print slowly blurring into a complete hazy mess.
"Sure, thank you!" He distantly heard Jaejoong replying the other almost ecstatically.
Changmin had probably just given the temporary staff some more work...
It was perplexing, almost infuriating, how Jaejoong managed to always sound so happy whenever anyone piled him with menial jobs.
-
When Jaejoong first arrived a week ago, he had innocently engaged the other for help in searching the files for a record, and the other had 'sured' him so readily the he almost felt like the scum of the earth right then- like he had slapped a jubilant, jumping kid right across the face violently, and the kid didn't even have the mental intellect to burst into tears, instead thanking him for the pain.
He never sought for the other's help after that, and he wondered how anybody could.
Shaking his head, he tried to dispel the terrible image of Jaejoong's head affixed to the soft, round body of an infant.
Good god. Could the infant stop skipping?
- - -
Damn the world.
Damn the whole corporate world and god have mercy on the forests and forests of trees that had to be sacrificed just for a presentation.
Wheeling his chair over to the edge of his office to collect the presentation slides that he had just printed, he quickly scanned through the sheets to double check his work.
Yep, okay.
Then he needed to add the proposal he had painstakingly created with his blood and intestinal juices, before making fifteen copies of the entire stack then binding it because 'the bosses liked their things binded.'
Shooting towards the common printing room their level shared, he couldn't help but curse magnificently at the situation at hand- one of the two printers was beeping incessantly, its red light flashing to indicate that it was out of order, and well, the other was occupied.
Not only occupied, mind you, but occupied by an idle Kim Jaejoong, whose fingers were tap-tapping against the feeder tray as if to engage himself while the printers worked away.
Yunho couldn't help but groan, watching transfixedly as the other banged his certain vital organ incessantly against the hulking photocopier while his blood travelled southwards despite his impeccable self control.
That was his complete issue with the university student.
Jaejoong was so completely unaware of his damned sexuality, viewing the world in the most innocent, untainted lenses that he wanted to tear his hair off in an attempt to censor his weird thoughts and drown his endless urges.
"Oh gosh! Yunho!" Jaejoong exclaimed happily when he finally noticed him standing at the doorway.
How could somebody be so chirpy in such a dreary office environment?
Maybe it was the fact that he wasn't obligated to don the standard office wear and strangle himself with a tie.
Or maybe it was the knowledge that this job was temporary, and he was earning twelve dollars per hour (kids were so easy to placate. You could shove them twelve dollars to do the most menial, pointless jobs and they wouldn't mind because twelve dollars was so much, and with thirty you could buy a nice shirt! He would resign if anybody paid him that amount to work. His new apartment was almost a million for Christ's sake).
He only looked at the other stupidly as he wrestled the writhing urge to ask why the other was so damned chirpy- he was so genuinely curious but at the same time he didn't want Jaejoong to speak at all.
Every time a word slipped out of the other's pink bow-shaped lips, he wanted to lick all of it up slowly and seal the outlet with his own orifice. It was so odd, that he felt like throwing every single thing in his hands down and clearing off into a bomb shelter and only emerging when the hazard was ten feet under the ground.
"Do you have a lot to photocopy?" Jaejoong leaned in worriedly, rounding behind to peer over his shoulder.
Jaejoong wasn't pressing up against him, but he might as well have been. He couldn't help but swear violently in his mind at how the other's icy deodorant filtered into his nostrils like creeping bluebells.
He wanted to push the boy up against the wall and yell that he had gotten it all wrong.
All fucking wrong.
Because damn it! He didn't fit that cool, merciless scent at all, and this- this was the kid's strawberry scented deodorant he was supposed to use. This would be the last damned time he would ever catch any whiff of the terrible foul-smelling odour coming off him, or else he would personally shove him into a tub to give him a cold water bathe.
But he said none of that.
"I need fifteen copies of this, binded by two." His words tumbled out like rolling waters when dams opened, and he practically shoved his stack of papers into the other's face.
"I have things to do. So much more important things to do." He mumbled more to himself than the other as he shot back to his desk, not once turning to catch the confusion on Jaejoong's face.
The look slowly faded to wry comprehension as the other returned to his original spot, idly knocking the bottom half of his body against the equipment, his slim fingers running against the grain of the copy machine while it whirled noisily.
- -
It took about half an hour for Yunho to finally regain his composure to resume the tone of professionalism he commonly employed in his emails, a thankful relief from the overly emotional rubbish that he had deleted.
As he worked his way through his inbox with unflappable calm and control, he was abruptly interrupted by a light knocking on his office door.
Ignoring it, he continued tapping away furiously but he could still feel the presence of the intruder lingering at the door.
"Yes?" He finally whipped his head up with a voice laced with so much venom that Changmin would have probably thrown something at him, like the last time he had employed the same tone on the taller man.
Oh.
He felt himself shrivelling at the sight of a bemused Jaejoong draped against his doorframe.
Oh god, no. No, please don't!
His door was still a virgin, he wanted to yell in exasperation while he mentally peeled the other's lean frame off the glass.
The glass was just a year old, barely even a toddler, and it definitely wasn't ready to be de-virginized, nor was it interested in being in contact with a sexy body, and now could he please wipe that stupid smile off his face?
He only stood up slowly to stare at the younger boy.
"How may I help you?"
Still a complete package of professionalism, yep.
"Well I've printed fifteen copies after I did Junsu's printing, but I don't know how to work the binding machine."
How could somebody look so good sheepish? It was almost like those porn materials where the girls would don those weird outfits with their lips thickly coated with buckets of gloss, complete with those unnaturally huge eyes.
It was a situational fetish thing, and people would probably pay to look at that face.
Don't look so cute! He wanted to yell at the other.
Don't subconsciously pull faces!
Don't allow your sexual appeal to multiply! People would do funny things to you that you wouldn't want!
"Oh right. I'll show you." He crossed the office in three strides as he brushed past the other who hadn't even left his post.
Trying his best to not let it get into him, he channelled the excess emotions into his legs as the other struggled to keep up.
"Say, Yunho." The other began the moment they reached the printing room.
Yunho looked up from the cupboards where he was searching for the plastic sheet that went in front and the cardboard at the back, to meet the other's eyes.
"You're honestly the face of professionalism."
He only tilted his head in question as his brows furrowed.
"You do things with this unrivalled focus and amazing productivity." He pinched a thumb and finger as if exacting his colleague's inspiring discipline.
The suited man's eyes only reduced to slits in disapproval, not replying as he suppressed the urge to snort at how off mark Jaejoong was. In what way had he been efficient?
He had merely been channeling his torrent of (sexual) frustration from a certain young kid with unparalleled sexuality. He shook his head wryly as he switched topics.
"This goes to the front, and this at the back. You put this on, pull it open, switch this on, shove it in hard then pull it back out."
He ran through easily, edging away quickly as the other moved in to work on the next booklet.
On an afterthought, he decided that he didn't want to see Jaejoong anymore.
"Never mind. I can do this on my own." His hand hovered over the other's shoulder afraid to land.
The runway was too volatile and it would jeopardize the mission.
Jaejoong turned to look at him, his lips jutting out slightly, his eyes wide with disappointment. Yunho gulped subconsciously in shock. Did Jaejoong know that he was doing that?
"But you just taught me! I can do it. Really!"
The kid was asking for work (or practically a slap across his face)! Who ever wanted extra work! Oh, bless his soul.
"No-" his words were lost as the other suddenly slid the ring into the machine, before gathering a stack of papers.
"See! You don't even know how to shove it in hard!" He scolded lightly as he pushed the stack in roughly.
"Ow. You really shoved that in hard," Jaejoong practically cooed breathlessly with a look of wonderment. Yunho only grunted as he stood back to supervise the other's first independent attempt.
As he watched the other continue almost systematically, he realised how dirty their prior conversation could have sounded. Front, back, and shoving it in hard?
He groaned softly to himself as he cursed the other's existence- he was now not only a high flying corporate lawyer who harboured weird thoughts about a temporary staff six years younger than him, but one that engaged in dirty talk with said culprit.
Yunho mustered every single ounce of discipline within him to not bail from the tiny room yelling at the top of his voice.
- - - - -
A/N: Soo, yeah. The ridiculous factor for DSCM's much higher than 24HL (this's the highest I've ever attained, in my opinion), and it moved so quickly when I wrote completed it monthss ago. It's not very long though, and I did try to post it once, but god, posting's such a pain with all that text formatting. I finally got round to do it, because I suppose I really wanted to get everything settled asap. School's starting soon, and I'm moving all my junk to the dorm room tomorrow. I really hope that my roommate's a nice person. It's like I'm using myself as the benchmark of nice (omg, snorts) and the bar seems so high, god. No, I'm serious. Really. I have this thing where I like to think of fangirls as friendly and accepting people. Which kind of includes me, heh. Anyway, I'm a nervous wreck right now and I hope this whole college thing goes well, even though I don't know a single person.
Thrown to the wild. *cues manic wolf howl*
Thank you for reading, and do leave a comment if you thought it wasn't that bad. D: D:
Prev Chap | Next Chap
Author: countingcr0ws
Beta: liltee_jycyj
Pairing/ Characters: Yunjae
Rating: PG
Form: Three-shot ( 1 | 2 | 3 )
Genre: AU, Plain Ridiculousness, Ridiculously Happy, Romance
Summary: High flying lawyer Jung Yunho exercises every inch of his straining self control to reign in his perverted thoughts of the young, beguiling intern that hurts his very dick and soul.
Inspired by: Don't Stand So Close to Me/ Young Girl by the Glee Cast, My job stint
The heck was this... Yunho picked the mug up for a closer inspection as he peered curiously at the cartoon characters printed around the porcelain.
There was a blonde lion, a cutesy tiger, a manly rabbit, a stupid looking sheep and a frowning deer.
Irritated, he rubbed at the weird lion with mild annoyance.
The temporary staff was soo weird.
He was sure he had seen Jaejoong staring stupidly at the mug in between work, and to be absolutely honest, the mug was downright juvenile, and completely typical of Jaejoong and his puerile interests...
"Eh, Yunho! What happened to your mug?"
Yunho jumped in shock when the owner of said cup suddenly appeared to catch him in his act.
The mug leapt out of his hand, and he watched it fall- falling slowly like in those movies with those expensive cameras that captured approximately a thousand million shots per nanosecond.
Noo... his hands reached out instinctively to catch the cup even though his mind was still reeling.
"My baby!" Jaejoong exclaimed as he reached out simultaneously to save his drinking utensil.
Both the man and the university student caught it at the same time before it connected fatally with the counter.
Gasping to himself loudly, he quickly retracted his hands in shock. Jaejoong's hands were like satin!
Watching the other fawn over the cup with the same googly eyes and the small pout that did weird things to him, he rubbed his scalded fingers behind his back dejectedly.
"Oh my babyshinki... I'm so sorry."
Yunho grimaced as the other apologized solemnly to the inanimate object as he watched the other polish the surface tenderly with his jacket sleeve as if it were some fucking magic lamp.
"Don't cry..." the other continued to coo at the mug, and Yunho was sure that he was on the verge of choking himself in frustration. Scratch that. He was on the verge of choking himself in frustration.
"I'm sorry, Jaejoong." He quickly took the first window of opportunity to apologize when the other stopped moaning for a short second.
Jaejoong didn't look up for a few moments (oh dear. Was the kid crying?) but when he did, a bright smile was plastered across his face and he was replied with a chirpy 'it's okay.'
Yunho nodded generally as he watched the other fill the weird mug with a little cold water, bringing it to his full lips slowly, letting it hover in mid-air for a thousand long beats before finally setting the cup down with a conflicted look on his face after the rim but ghosted his lips.
Yunho tugged at his tie nervously as he helped himself to the stale coffee just to engage himself, watching guiltily as Jaejoong finally emptied the mug the other left for his own desk with the empty vessel in his hands.
That was the last time he ever saw the mug- Jaejoong had a new mug in the office pantry the next day.
- - - - -
"Jaejoong!"
Yunho immediately looked up and out of the glass panel that separated his private office and the common staff the moment the other's name was called, to watch as Changmin, the Human Resource in-charge reached out to hit the student in the arm.
The lawyer had already shot out of his chair in a swift move, ready to stalk out and yell at his colleague when Jaejoong suddenly returned the violence with a resounding smack (that actually reached his private office).
Slowly replacing his butt onto the swivel chair heavily, utterly dumbfounded and completely floored, Yunho tugged at his silk tie awkwardly.
What had just happened?
What black magic had he just witnessed? He stared at his papers, the black print slowly blurring into a complete hazy mess.
"Sure, thank you!" He distantly heard Jaejoong replying the other almost ecstatically.
Changmin had probably just given the temporary staff some more work...
It was perplexing, almost infuriating, how Jaejoong managed to always sound so happy whenever anyone piled him with menial jobs.
-
When Jaejoong first arrived a week ago, he had innocently engaged the other for help in searching the files for a record, and the other had 'sured' him so readily the he almost felt like the scum of the earth right then- like he had slapped a jubilant, jumping kid right across the face violently, and the kid didn't even have the mental intellect to burst into tears, instead thanking him for the pain.
He never sought for the other's help after that, and he wondered how anybody could.
Shaking his head, he tried to dispel the terrible image of Jaejoong's head affixed to the soft, round body of an infant.
Good god. Could the infant stop skipping?
- - -
Damn the world.
Damn the whole corporate world and god have mercy on the forests and forests of trees that had to be sacrificed just for a presentation.
Wheeling his chair over to the edge of his office to collect the presentation slides that he had just printed, he quickly scanned through the sheets to double check his work.
Yep, okay.
Then he needed to add the proposal he had painstakingly created with his blood and intestinal juices, before making fifteen copies of the entire stack then binding it because 'the bosses liked their things binded.'
Shooting towards the common printing room their level shared, he couldn't help but curse magnificently at the situation at hand- one of the two printers was beeping incessantly, its red light flashing to indicate that it was out of order, and well, the other was occupied.
Not only occupied, mind you, but occupied by an idle Kim Jaejoong, whose fingers were tap-tapping against the feeder tray as if to engage himself while the printers worked away.
Yunho couldn't help but groan, watching transfixedly as the other banged his certain vital organ incessantly against the hulking photocopier while his blood travelled southwards despite his impeccable self control.
That was his complete issue with the university student.
Jaejoong was so completely unaware of his damned sexuality, viewing the world in the most innocent, untainted lenses that he wanted to tear his hair off in an attempt to censor his weird thoughts and drown his endless urges.
"Oh gosh! Yunho!" Jaejoong exclaimed happily when he finally noticed him standing at the doorway.
How could somebody be so chirpy in such a dreary office environment?
Maybe it was the fact that he wasn't obligated to don the standard office wear and strangle himself with a tie.
Or maybe it was the knowledge that this job was temporary, and he was earning twelve dollars per hour (kids were so easy to placate. You could shove them twelve dollars to do the most menial, pointless jobs and they wouldn't mind because twelve dollars was so much, and with thirty you could buy a nice shirt! He would resign if anybody paid him that amount to work. His new apartment was almost a million for Christ's sake).
He only looked at the other stupidly as he wrestled the writhing urge to ask why the other was so damned chirpy- he was so genuinely curious but at the same time he didn't want Jaejoong to speak at all.
Every time a word slipped out of the other's pink bow-shaped lips, he wanted to lick all of it up slowly and seal the outlet with his own orifice. It was so odd, that he felt like throwing every single thing in his hands down and clearing off into a bomb shelter and only emerging when the hazard was ten feet under the ground.
"Do you have a lot to photocopy?" Jaejoong leaned in worriedly, rounding behind to peer over his shoulder.
Jaejoong wasn't pressing up against him, but he might as well have been. He couldn't help but swear violently in his mind at how the other's icy deodorant filtered into his nostrils like creeping bluebells.
He wanted to push the boy up against the wall and yell that he had gotten it all wrong.
All fucking wrong.
Because damn it! He didn't fit that cool, merciless scent at all, and this- this was the kid's strawberry scented deodorant he was supposed to use. This would be the last damned time he would ever catch any whiff of the terrible foul-smelling odour coming off him, or else he would personally shove him into a tub to give him a cold water bathe.
But he said none of that.
"I need fifteen copies of this, binded by two." His words tumbled out like rolling waters when dams opened, and he practically shoved his stack of papers into the other's face.
"I have things to do. So much more important things to do." He mumbled more to himself than the other as he shot back to his desk, not once turning to catch the confusion on Jaejoong's face.
The look slowly faded to wry comprehension as the other returned to his original spot, idly knocking the bottom half of his body against the equipment, his slim fingers running against the grain of the copy machine while it whirled noisily.
- -
It took about half an hour for Yunho to finally regain his composure to resume the tone of professionalism he commonly employed in his emails, a thankful relief from the overly emotional rubbish that he had deleted.
As he worked his way through his inbox with unflappable calm and control, he was abruptly interrupted by a light knocking on his office door.
Ignoring it, he continued tapping away furiously but he could still feel the presence of the intruder lingering at the door.
"Yes?" He finally whipped his head up with a voice laced with so much venom that Changmin would have probably thrown something at him, like the last time he had employed the same tone on the taller man.
Oh.
He felt himself shrivelling at the sight of a bemused Jaejoong draped against his doorframe.
Oh god, no. No, please don't!
His door was still a virgin, he wanted to yell in exasperation while he mentally peeled the other's lean frame off the glass.
The glass was just a year old, barely even a toddler, and it definitely wasn't ready to be de-virginized, nor was it interested in being in contact with a sexy body, and now could he please wipe that stupid smile off his face?
He only stood up slowly to stare at the younger boy.
"How may I help you?"
Still a complete package of professionalism, yep.
"Well I've printed fifteen copies after I did Junsu's printing, but I don't know how to work the binding machine."
How could somebody look so good sheepish? It was almost like those porn materials where the girls would don those weird outfits with their lips thickly coated with buckets of gloss, complete with those unnaturally huge eyes.
It was a situational fetish thing, and people would probably pay to look at that face.
Don't look so cute! He wanted to yell at the other.
Don't subconsciously pull faces!
Don't allow your sexual appeal to multiply! People would do funny things to you that you wouldn't want!
"Oh right. I'll show you." He crossed the office in three strides as he brushed past the other who hadn't even left his post.
Trying his best to not let it get into him, he channelled the excess emotions into his legs as the other struggled to keep up.
"Say, Yunho." The other began the moment they reached the printing room.
Yunho looked up from the cupboards where he was searching for the plastic sheet that went in front and the cardboard at the back, to meet the other's eyes.
"You're honestly the face of professionalism."
He only tilted his head in question as his brows furrowed.
"You do things with this unrivalled focus and amazing productivity." He pinched a thumb and finger as if exacting his colleague's inspiring discipline.
The suited man's eyes only reduced to slits in disapproval, not replying as he suppressed the urge to snort at how off mark Jaejoong was. In what way had he been efficient?
He had merely been channeling his torrent of (sexual) frustration from a certain young kid with unparalleled sexuality. He shook his head wryly as he switched topics.
"This goes to the front, and this at the back. You put this on, pull it open, switch this on, shove it in hard then pull it back out."
He ran through easily, edging away quickly as the other moved in to work on the next booklet.
On an afterthought, he decided that he didn't want to see Jaejoong anymore.
"Never mind. I can do this on my own." His hand hovered over the other's shoulder afraid to land.
The runway was too volatile and it would jeopardize the mission.
Jaejoong turned to look at him, his lips jutting out slightly, his eyes wide with disappointment. Yunho gulped subconsciously in shock. Did Jaejoong know that he was doing that?
"But you just taught me! I can do it. Really!"
The kid was asking for work (or practically a slap across his face)! Who ever wanted extra work! Oh, bless his soul.
"No-" his words were lost as the other suddenly slid the ring into the machine, before gathering a stack of papers.
"See! You don't even know how to shove it in hard!" He scolded lightly as he pushed the stack in roughly.
"Ow. You really shoved that in hard," Jaejoong practically cooed breathlessly with a look of wonderment. Yunho only grunted as he stood back to supervise the other's first independent attempt.
As he watched the other continue almost systematically, he realised how dirty their prior conversation could have sounded. Front, back, and shoving it in hard?
He groaned softly to himself as he cursed the other's existence- he was now not only a high flying corporate lawyer who harboured weird thoughts about a temporary staff six years younger than him, but one that engaged in dirty talk with said culprit.
Yunho mustered every single ounce of discipline within him to not bail from the tiny room yelling at the top of his voice.
- - - - -
A/N: Soo, yeah. The ridiculous factor for DSCM's much higher than 24HL (this's the highest I've ever attained, in my opinion), and it moved so quickly when I wrote completed it monthss ago. It's not very long though, and I did try to post it once, but god, posting's such a pain with all that text formatting. I finally got round to do it, because I suppose I really wanted to get everything settled asap. School's starting soon, and I'm moving all my junk to the dorm room tomorrow. I really hope that my roommate's a nice person. It's like I'm using myself as the benchmark of nice (omg, snorts) and the bar seems so high, god. No, I'm serious. Really. I have this thing where I like to think of fangirls as friendly and accepting people. Which kind of includes me, heh. Anyway, I'm a nervous wreck right now and I hope this whole college thing goes well, even though I don't know a single person.
Thrown to the wild. *cues manic wolf howl*
Thank you for reading, and do leave a comment if you thought it wasn't that bad. D: D:
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