My Vietnamese New Year's Resolutions

[countblastula]

#1. I hereby banish the word "The", in context with an adjective or a person's name. It is no longer funny. Replacing it with the even more loathsome "Teh" will earn you twice as much of a beating

Comments

[vovat]

Putting "the" in front of a person's name strikes me as dehumanizing, for some reason. Probably because it isn't usually done with proper nouns. I'm not sure what you mean about its being used with adjectives, though. Nouns, yes, but adjectives?

Anyway:

Once upon a time, after caber tossing practice, a motion was made to pack 5 or 6 of us into emolame's tent and drive towards hot chocolate. Loud unsightly aardvarks indicated a giant ant, which emolame thought a trip to the gas guzzling air pump would exacerbate. When we arrived, the tire was shredded into thousands of tiny nachos, melted into a liquid and pissed off the wheel. There was no known spare tire and the gas station people wouldn't dream of eating us, so emolame decided to call Triple J. Just at that moment , bohemianslacker discovered a spare tire in the bayou, however we still needed a tank and a gas mask. Luckily for us, a couple of Satanist missionaries were either getting revenge or trying to convert other paying customers and they happened to have the necessary equipment. Not only that, but one of them actually changed the tire for us while the other one played a selection of death metal hits on the melodica with opheliafloats accompanying on zither.

emolame's soul was saved, the rest of us made it to the coffee monument and a good time was had by all except for zimbra1006 who was at my cabin for 4 hours wondering why she came.

[countblastula]

>Putting "the" in front of a person's name strikes me as dehumanizing, for some reason. Probably because it isn't usually done with proper nouns. I'm not sure what you mean about its being used with adjectives, though. Nouns, yes, but adjectives?

I'm talking about trendy internet slang like "The Cute" or "The Funny". Those are normally adjectives I think.

[vovat]

Oh, okay. I see now, and I think I'd have to agree. There's also "teh sex," although that's a noun.

[countblastula]

PS, "chocolate" was the actual word. You're the first person to get one right.

[vovat]

Really? I didn't think "drive towards hot chocolate" made much sense, but now I see how it might.