Et tu, Alumni Directory?

[cossar]

Google can be a nice distraction when you're bored. Sometimes I google people I've lost contact with, or even myself (did you know that I'm a conservative politician in Scotland?). Well, late last night I tried using the Duke Alumni Directory for much the same purposes. It did indeed help pass the time, but I stumbled on the biggest scandal ever.

Comments

[aliwilliams]

WHAT. THE. FUCK. ?!.

Oh someone's gonna meet the business end of my ass-kicking boots.

[wmetoile]

I swear it wasn't me. No, really. Swear, it wasn't. I'm not creative enough to have conceived of something so devious. And amazing. Just in case, if you can't convince Duke that you're not married, where are you two registered?

[cossar]

You mean the bridal registry? EBGames, of course.

[wmetoile]

Okay, my morning is officially shot. I'm just going to be giggling about this for the next four hours. Fuckin' wow, man.

You mean the bridal registry?

I was guessing some unholy combination of Williams-Sonoma and The WWE Store.

[aliwilliams]

That's what you think, punk.

I'm going to need Tiffany china for this.

[drathena]

Can't. Stop. Laughing.

*wheeze*

I'll make sure we toast you guys at wine-tasting tonight.

[klugspeck]

Ohohoho! ::devilish laugh:: To whoever did this, my hat's off to you.

And guys, divorce may be ugly, but try to make it amicable. Think of the children.

[aliwilliams]

You know, I am thinking of the children. Thinking about casting a suspicious eye toward your entire class.

[sunnydlita]

What alumni directory?

Also, could it be that someone just saw you two with the same address and made the Southern hetero assumption that a man and woman can only co-habitate if they are married?

[cossar]

www.dukealumni.com

The trouble with your theory, however, is that we don't have the same address.

[sunnydlita]

Wait - really? You DON"T live on Bleecker St?

[cossar]

Well, officially.