How I started my morning (or, I have the weirdest friends)
The following is the text conversation I had early this morning with my friend Jeff, who is one of the most competent and yet least appropriate people I could think of to gig for churches on Sundays: J: If God wanted presbyterians to make music, he would have given them souls
C: Ouch, that bad huh? Hey, btw, Bizet's Carmen came on last night, and all I could think of was you singing "Tor-e-a-dor-o! dun du dun du dun...!" by the music lockers in HMU :-)
*ten minutes go by*
J: This pastor has based the last five minutes of his sermon on his misreading of the word 'merely' ... he keeps emphasizing that the bible says merrily ... What an idiot
C: *awaiting the bolt of lightning*
J: There are too many of them we need a flood
C: Alright, here's the plan: you do a rain dance, discretely because you're in church and all, and I'll get to work on the voodoo. *thinking* where can i find a sacrificial chicken at this hour...
J: I don't think the laws of physics allow for a discrete rain dance
J: We might be fucked
C: Hrmm... And chickens are notoriously uncooperative. I think you might be right.
C: Unless... Is there a Plan B?
J: I think suicide bombs are the traditional remedy
C: I'd respond with a crisis hotline number, except that you make a valid point. Tell Allah hi for me; vaya con dios.
J: That last one made me laugh and I spilled christs blood on my pants
C: LOL
C: Ouch, that bad huh? Hey, btw, Bizet's Carmen came on last night, and all I could think of was you singing "Tor-e-a-dor-o! dun du dun du dun...!" by the music lockers in HMU :-)
*ten minutes go by*
J: This pastor has based the last five minutes of his sermon on his misreading of the word 'merely' ... he keeps emphasizing that the bible says merrily ... What an idiot
C: *awaiting the bolt of lightning*
J: There are too many of them we need a flood
C: Alright, here's the plan: you do a rain dance, discretely because you're in church and all, and I'll get to work on the voodoo. *thinking* where can i find a sacrificial chicken at this hour...
J: I don't think the laws of physics allow for a discrete rain dance
J: We might be fucked
C: Hrmm... And chickens are notoriously uncooperative. I think you might be right.
C: Unless... Is there a Plan B?
J: I think suicide bombs are the traditional remedy
C: I'd respond with a crisis hotline number, except that you make a valid point. Tell Allah hi for me; vaya con dios.
J: That last one made me laugh and I spilled christs blood on my pants
C: LOL