Out of the Blue
Yesterday I was standing in a newsagent's shop when my phone went off. Text message. This is not unusual. Most of you know that I do not do phone calls, I do texts. There are exceptions, but generally, if I am in public, my phone doesn't get answered.
I checked the message.
Happy Easter, love Jacqui, Milt and Theodora. xxx
That Jacqui is my foster sister. She lived with us for many years because her mother threw her out. She became my sister, friend and confidante, her house was my safe space when my world fell apart aged 21, was the only one who could stand up to my father, catered my wedding in 1999 and then, slowly, withdrew. I tried to find her, sent cards, texts, emails, letters...nothing.
I added her to the list of Family Who Go Away, accepted it, and moved on. Still missing her, but there's only so much you can do.
I texted back, then we got on the underground. She left a message. I listened when I was on the train home. I heard her voice, but it was...different.
"Little sis? Is that you? I can't text you back easily, because I'm blind. Please, call me."
In shock, I called. My shock lasted about 30 seconds into the call. My sister was there, still as badass as ever and possibly just as filthy.
She had a massive stroke three years ago. It took her eyesight, permanently. It took some of her memories too, but she gets them back with prompting.
She found me, because she got a new phone, and the old one only transferred some of the names over, so she texted everyone to see who was who. My number was still in there, after all these years.
She said "Yeah, the doctors told me it was permanent, and I laughed. 'You are listening to what we said? Your sight is gone?' What did you expect me to do? I said. Cry? 'Well, laughing is not a normal reaction Jacqui.' Like I'm normal sis. Ha."
"But, Jax, you can't look at all the men now."
"Oh but I can feel. 'I'm just an ill, blind woman, let me feel you. Oh that isn't your chest?' "
"Atta girl."
"Happy Easter! I dyed red eggs today, and I made tsoureki, ALL BY MYSELF."
"Jesus H, I can't even do that, and I can see!"
Her kids still live at home. Milt will be 30 in December, Theodora, my flower girl, will be 25 in July. They are both single, but J hopes they will move out one day, even if she can't get upstairs to make use of all the free space. (Severe back injury from years back. She lives on the ground floor of her house.)
I now have her address, and I will go and find her again. She said "I can't see you, but I know that laugh. It's you."
I checked the message.
Happy Easter, love Jacqui, Milt and Theodora. xxx
That Jacqui is my foster sister. She lived with us for many years because her mother threw her out. She became my sister, friend and confidante, her house was my safe space when my world fell apart aged 21, was the only one who could stand up to my father, catered my wedding in 1999 and then, slowly, withdrew. I tried to find her, sent cards, texts, emails, letters...nothing.
I added her to the list of Family Who Go Away, accepted it, and moved on. Still missing her, but there's only so much you can do.
I texted back, then we got on the underground. She left a message. I listened when I was on the train home. I heard her voice, but it was...different.
"Little sis? Is that you? I can't text you back easily, because I'm blind. Please, call me."
In shock, I called. My shock lasted about 30 seconds into the call. My sister was there, still as badass as ever and possibly just as filthy.
She had a massive stroke three years ago. It took her eyesight, permanently. It took some of her memories too, but she gets them back with prompting.
She found me, because she got a new phone, and the old one only transferred some of the names over, so she texted everyone to see who was who. My number was still in there, after all these years.
She said "Yeah, the doctors told me it was permanent, and I laughed. 'You are listening to what we said? Your sight is gone?' What did you expect me to do? I said. Cry? 'Well, laughing is not a normal reaction Jacqui.' Like I'm normal sis. Ha."
"But, Jax, you can't look at all the men now."
"Oh but I can feel. 'I'm just an ill, blind woman, let me feel you. Oh that isn't your chest?' "
"Atta girl."
"Happy Easter! I dyed red eggs today, and I made tsoureki, ALL BY MYSELF."
"Jesus H, I can't even do that, and I can see!"
Her kids still live at home. Milt will be 30 in December, Theodora, my flower girl, will be 25 in July. They are both single, but J hopes they will move out one day, even if she can't get upstairs to make use of all the free space. (Severe back injury from years back. She lives on the ground floor of her house.)
I now have her address, and I will go and find her again. She said "I can't see you, but I know that laugh. It's you."