Journal Entry 9.1 - A Very Odd Dream
Sorry bout the karaoke tale being interrupted, but I had a dream thursday night that I feel compelled to post. One of those feelings that you don't question. Well, here goes. This dream is broken into three separate dreams, all of which take place in order of each other, are part of the same timeline, but take place at different points in said timeline. I'll hit all three parts in this post. And away we go...
Dream 1: The Day of
This first dream is not very long. I am hanging out at hodge's house watching Raw (our monday night ritual), and we are having a good time like usual. Suddenley the light's went out and my dream faded to black. All I knew is that the world as we know it had ended. I don't know how or why, but it did.
Dream 2: Approx 2-6 months after
This dream was the longest of the three, but most of it is feeling based and less on the actuall events. I felt dead inside. To the best of my knowledge all of my friends, except hodge, were dead. All of my family, was dead. I had nothing much to live for except what I was doing in this dream. The whole dream I was taking food and supplies to various settlements of survivors. A lot of the dream was personal monologue that I can't recall, but the impression I had was that I was no longer living for myself, but to help my fellow survivors and if it wasn't for that, I would be dead. Dream fades to nothingness as I wake up long enough to stir.
Dream 3: Approx 6 years after
This one was not the longest, but it had the most to it and the most significant events. In this dream the sun is shining brighter now. The grass has grown back. I now live in a single level house in the middle of nowhere with hodge, crystal, kima, and div (please correct my spelling on that name if I am wrong). The beginning of the dream is me sitting back on the porch in a reflective mood. Enjoying the good weather. Not to hot, not too cold. More internal monologue that I don't remember, but the impression was that I have since found everyone, my friends, my family and they are either alright, or I have come to terms with their passings by this point. Either way I have the feeling that this was one of the first times that I had allowed myself to be happy again, and it felt great. hodge was in the house doing something and I couldn't wait for kima, crystal and div to get home from a party of some kind. Finally they pull up. Crystal and div have had a few too many and they are laughing at some inside joke and end up falling down in the yard. They pick themselves up and walk back in the house as kima came up to say hi. I could tell she had a few her self and I made a crack about driving drunk and she fired back that it didn't really matter anymore cause who would arrest her. We laughed. This is where I start to lose the dream. I realized in the dream that it was a dream as kima sat in my lap facing me. I looked at her deep in the eyes and with tears begining to fall I said "If this is a dream, I hope that you are dreaming it too." With that I pulled her close and as I went to give her a kiss my eyes opened and I was awake...with a tear rolling down my cheek.
I had to share that dream with everyone, I don't know why, but something has told me to. That was a hell of an experience. I am still trying to figure out what it all means, and I'm hoping that writing it down will help me in that. It had it's bad points, but in the end I had everything I needed. Friends, family, and love. Good night, and god bless.
Dream 1: The Day of
This first dream is not very long. I am hanging out at hodge's house watching Raw (our monday night ritual), and we are having a good time like usual. Suddenley the light's went out and my dream faded to black. All I knew is that the world as we know it had ended. I don't know how or why, but it did.
Dream 2: Approx 2-6 months after
This dream was the longest of the three, but most of it is feeling based and less on the actuall events. I felt dead inside. To the best of my knowledge all of my friends, except hodge, were dead. All of my family, was dead. I had nothing much to live for except what I was doing in this dream. The whole dream I was taking food and supplies to various settlements of survivors. A lot of the dream was personal monologue that I can't recall, but the impression I had was that I was no longer living for myself, but to help my fellow survivors and if it wasn't for that, I would be dead. Dream fades to nothingness as I wake up long enough to stir.
Dream 3: Approx 6 years after
This one was not the longest, but it had the most to it and the most significant events. In this dream the sun is shining brighter now. The grass has grown back. I now live in a single level house in the middle of nowhere with hodge, crystal, kima, and div (please correct my spelling on that name if I am wrong). The beginning of the dream is me sitting back on the porch in a reflective mood. Enjoying the good weather. Not to hot, not too cold. More internal monologue that I don't remember, but the impression was that I have since found everyone, my friends, my family and they are either alright, or I have come to terms with their passings by this point. Either way I have the feeling that this was one of the first times that I had allowed myself to be happy again, and it felt great. hodge was in the house doing something and I couldn't wait for kima, crystal and div to get home from a party of some kind. Finally they pull up. Crystal and div have had a few too many and they are laughing at some inside joke and end up falling down in the yard. They pick themselves up and walk back in the house as kima came up to say hi. I could tell she had a few her self and I made a crack about driving drunk and she fired back that it didn't really matter anymore cause who would arrest her. We laughed. This is where I start to lose the dream. I realized in the dream that it was a dream as kima sat in my lap facing me. I looked at her deep in the eyes and with tears begining to fall I said "If this is a dream, I hope that you are dreaming it too." With that I pulled her close and as I went to give her a kiss my eyes opened and I was awake...with a tear rolling down my cheek.
I had to share that dream with everyone, I don't know why, but something has told me to. That was a hell of an experience. I am still trying to figure out what it all means, and I'm hoping that writing it down will help me in that. It had it's bad points, but in the end I had everything I needed. Friends, family, and love. Good night, and god bless.