supression
Confused Fur:
returns
Entry:
have increasingly been choosing sleep over livejournal posting/reading !!! shock Horror!!! what is the world coming to!!!
i don't know why... i think it has something to do with the realisation that LJ isn't going to get me into medical school... and the other realisation that all i have to do is abstain for about 5 months or so... and then once exams are over... i'll be going to uni (provided that temporarily neglecting LJ has the desired effect) and will have a huge ammount more time to bugger about online....
on the other hand... this could be one of those posts i seem to make every couple of months, that invariably say that i'll never ever be on Lj again... ever... which are always followed by late night posting every night from then on...
could be one of those... nonetheless i apologise for those who have made comments and had no replies as well as not keeping up with my friends...
speaking of uni and things... i got an interview for UCL... (university college london) for med.... so... that's be cool... so now, that means that of the four unis i applied to, one has given me an interview and an offer (AAB, St Georges) one's given me an interview (UCL, end of this month) and the other two have said that they've recieved my application and will process it...
... rambling now...
hmm, my mum thinks i'm repressed and secretive because i'm worried i'm gay and repress my inner feelings because i refuse to face it as a problem... she's not fur off i guess
she says my main problem is not discussing my problems with anyone... but i guess that's what LJ be for...
it's more my problem, that i know i'm gay... and because from my upbringing i "know" it's a bad thing (not that it's been militantly anti-gay or anything i've just heard so many good rational arguments against it)... and that's what i have trouble with... also the fact that if i know it's a bad thing, at the same time as believing that it's a conscious decision i've made and want to follow, i have trouble rationalising it...
oh yeah... and my being furry puts an additional spin on it too {smiles dryly}
like taking cookies i guess... ye know it be a bad thing... but ye still do it... because you want to... because they're nice and you like eating them...
what i need, is some conclusive proof that eating cookies is genetic...
but hey, life really isn't so bad ^_^ i'm happy (although i wish i didn't feel so much like the stereotypical angsty teenager) i've been feeling all tranquil and familial recently too... i guess it's the thought that i probably won't be at home this time next year
Art:
and now the news of goodness...
my commission for Tau (Cee_Eph) is done and awaits sending i guess... {looks pensive}
it's called
"Meditating ?"
... which is what the fox depicted has apparently been doing... he says that the shifty look and the biscuits are a zen thing
"Meditating ?"
i hope it's ok... he said he didn't want it too muscular so, i guess i do need to improve drawing body types other than "superhero"... it's comics... i blame them...
they've warped my percetions of what a human body looks like
i'm going to have to find out how he wants me to get it to him... i don't really know commissioning protocols
Somewhere on the MUCK, Confused_Fur has disconnected
returns
Entry:
have increasingly been choosing sleep over livejournal posting/reading !!! shock Horror!!! what is the world coming to!!!
i don't know why... i think it has something to do with the realisation that LJ isn't going to get me into medical school... and the other realisation that all i have to do is abstain for about 5 months or so... and then once exams are over... i'll be going to uni (provided that temporarily neglecting LJ has the desired effect) and will have a huge ammount more time to bugger about online....
on the other hand... this could be one of those posts i seem to make every couple of months, that invariably say that i'll never ever be on Lj again... ever... which are always followed by late night posting every night from then on...
could be one of those... nonetheless i apologise for those who have made comments and had no replies as well as not keeping up with my friends...
speaking of uni and things... i got an interview for UCL... (university college london) for med.... so... that's be cool... so now, that means that of the four unis i applied to, one has given me an interview and an offer (AAB, St Georges) one's given me an interview (UCL, end of this month) and the other two have said that they've recieved my application and will process it...
... rambling now...
hmm, my mum thinks i'm repressed and secretive because i'm worried i'm gay and repress my inner feelings because i refuse to face it as a problem... she's not fur off i guess
she says my main problem is not discussing my problems with anyone... but i guess that's what LJ be for...
it's more my problem, that i know i'm gay... and because from my upbringing i "know" it's a bad thing (not that it's been militantly anti-gay or anything i've just heard so many good rational arguments against it)... and that's what i have trouble with... also the fact that if i know it's a bad thing, at the same time as believing that it's a conscious decision i've made and want to follow, i have trouble rationalising it...
oh yeah... and my being furry puts an additional spin on it too {smiles dryly}
like taking cookies i guess... ye know it be a bad thing... but ye still do it... because you want to... because they're nice and you like eating them...
what i need, is some conclusive proof that eating cookies is genetic...
but hey, life really isn't so bad ^_^ i'm happy (although i wish i didn't feel so much like the stereotypical angsty teenager) i've been feeling all tranquil and familial recently too... i guess it's the thought that i probably won't be at home this time next year
Art:
and now the news of goodness...
my commission for Tau (Cee_Eph) is done and awaits sending i guess... {looks pensive}
it's called
"Meditating ?"
... which is what the fox depicted has apparently been doing... he says that the shifty look and the biscuits are a zen thing
"Meditating ?"
i hope it's ok... he said he didn't want it too muscular so, i guess i do need to improve drawing body types other than "superhero"... it's comics... i blame them...
they've warped my percetions of what a human body looks like
i'm going to have to find out how he wants me to get it to him... i don't really know commissioning protocols
Somewhere on the MUCK, Confused_Fur has disconnected