I love, love that thing you do, and I can't keep my eyes, my mind, off you, I'm infatuated.
Such a good song. Have it on repeat, but I have to be careful not to listen to it too much. I've come to realize that when I find music I like, I play it over and over and over and over again and then I get sick of it to a point where I never want to hear it again and it just gets skipped over whenever it starts up on my playlist.
Anyway! About two months from deploying. Man, how time flies. It's strange thinking of how not a single thing in my life will be the same a year from now.
I have a confession... I figured this would be the ideal place to vent it. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it, but, well, here goes.
I was hungry last night and there was nothing even remotely healthy to eat in the house so I decided to drive over to Perkins and get their deluxe chef salad. Which is damn good, by the by. So I walk in and sit down, and this stunning waitress comes over to get my order and she looks to be in her early 20's at the most. I think. I can't even tell anymore. But, she smiles at me, and gives me this look and it, to me, seemed like a smile she doesn't give to just everyone, if you catch my meaning. I smile back and I'm just in awe. She comes by a couple of times and asks if I need anything else and I want to ask for her number like you would not believe but I force myself to not say anything since I'm taken and all. I see her at other tables and she barely smiles, but everytime she looks me in the eye, her face lights up and... Ahh. So she brings me my check, and I get up and head over to the register and she sees me going over there and follows behind me. She rings me up and I can't stop looking at her, and when she hands me my receipt, she smiles again and I can't help myself and end up giving her a $10 tip when my total came to $11 or so.
She thanks me in the sweetest damn voice I've ever heard and I could feel her watching me as I walked out. I've never in my life asked a girl I'd just met for her number and I've never been so damn tempted. Well, maybe I asked one or two girls, but it was nothing like that. Just completely random and approaching someone I've never seen or talked to and just... You know what I mean.
I know it's terrible, but I've been thinking about going back tonight or tomorrow and seeing if she's working and getting it then, but I know it's not cool and it wouldn't happen as long as I'm with Whitney, of course. But why the hell doesn't that kind of thing ever happen to me when I'm single.
I drive home and I get out of my car in the driveway and there's nobody around so I start dancing. Just, dancing. I've been... Practicing, sort of. I've been watching tutorials and videos online of gliding, floating and c-walking and all my life, I've wanted to be able to dance, and I'm getting pretty good, I think. Better than I ever thought I'd be, at least. lol But, yeah. I know someone must've seen me since it was only 11PM. It felt good, though, and my ego was the biggest it's been in a long time last night. I mean, it's always huge, but sometimes, I just feel like there isn't a damn thing I can't do.
I'm still very uncertain about me and Whitney. I can't really imagine us together long-term, so I know that I should probably end it soon. That and I'm still really young and want to be free to date around and whatnot. Sigh. I'm not a whore, I swear. I just like having options and dating when it feels right. She's going to be staying at my house for the next few weeks, though, so I can't really break things off until that's done with. Her family's going out of town so she needs a place to stay so I offered some assistance. I still think she's great and very sweet, but... Yeah. It feels off.
Been working out and drinking my protein shakes and taking my creatine pills and I'm definitely happy with the results. A lot of my friends don't believe I've actually been working out until they touch for themselves. Some people think I'm going overboard with the shakes and carb/protein counting and everything else, but for the first time, I'm being extreme with something that's actually good for me.
I hung out with Alyssa and Nikki the other night. Hadn't seen either of them for years. We had some beers, sat around and talked and played Guitar Hero for hours. As I was leaving, me and Alyssa were by my car and she told me that ever since we broke up, her life has gone to hell and she has no idea what she's doing anymore. I could tell she wanted to kiss me while I was hugging her, especially since she's just recently broken up with her boyfriend after being together almost a year. I feel really bad for her and her situation... She's incredibly fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and sweet mother who's been there for her the entire time.
My recruiter called me on Thursday or so and apparently, someone that was scheduled to be shipped to boot in early October got into some trouble at a party and his shipping date has been suspended indefinitely. I was asked if I'd be willing to take his spot and leave a few months early. Naturally, everyone freaked when they found out but I'm not going anywhere. I still have way too many things to take care of first.
At work and a few minutes over my lunch, so I should probably get back to taking calls and whatnot. Such a busy day. I hate Mondays.