Pancake Night Part 11
Title: Pancake Night
Author: Concupid
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Vince/Howard and what's life without some surprises?
Summary: Howard's only good at talking about nonsense.
Warnings: graphic man love, sappiness, images that will inspire nightmares
Author's note: I'm cleaning up the mistakes as fast as I see them! Sorry for the more than usual number of errors!
Saboo's bedroom looked like a Voodoo whorehouse and it was working for Sebastian.
Saboo was running his fingers over Sebastian's ass and found the two small holes in the denim.
Holes from where Vince was apparently bitten by a homophobic snake.
When he'd met Vince, all he'd heard was "lapel", "How Moon", "Jack Cooper", "boots" and "buttons". Howard had filled in the rest later. Sometime before Sebastian had shoved his tongue down his throat.
"No pants?" Saboo said with a smirk as he worked his fingers into the holes.
"I'm wearing pants, dumbass, you're touching them right now," Sebastian snapped, wishing Saboo wouldn't talk. He was so beautiful but he was kind of a dick.
When Saboo looked confused, it clicked in Sebastian's brain, "Pants! Pants are underwear here. No, my pants are probably in Argentina hooking up with a g-string and I'm here, going commando in another man's fatigues."
"Christ, you're worse than Dennis," Saboo sneered, "A little second hand smoke and you're a retard."
"And hooking up with someone who thinks he's a fucking shaman. Don't forget, Malfoy, you were my third choice tonight: right after Magnum, PI and Joan Jett. You're just lucky weed makes me so horny," Sebastian retorted and he stroked Saboo through his tight black pants. Saboo didn't look quite so superior with his big brown eyes nearly rolling back in his head.
"Are those glasses even prescription or are they purely decoration?" Saboo asked as he pulled off Sebastian's glasses and looked through the lenses.
Sebastian blushed, "I have an astigmatism! You're hair looks like cotton candy."
"Hands off the hair!"
Sebastian's conscience whispered, You really should use a condom, as Sebastian allowed his/Vince's jeans to be tugged off, leaving him completely naked.
"Do you have any condoms?"
Saboo gave a superior sneer, "I'm a shaman."
"Does that mean you can do some kind of magic spell instead of using a rubber?" Sebastian asked as his conscience whispered, Seriously, use a condom! He's wearing leather pants!
"No," Saboo explained as he pulled a pack of condoms from his back pocket, "It means I get laid all the time. And I get a 10% discount at Shamansbury's."
Sebastian could barely hear his conscience over his own moans as it whispered, Really? Anal with a total stranger wearing leather pants? Don't swear so much, you sound slutty. Don't bite my hair!
No, that voice was real. That was Saboo.
Hey, that pink thing is watching. Tell him to go away. Don't let him watch! Don't let him join in! I don't care what shape his penis is, he DEFINITELY needs to wear a condom! Put one on each of his tentacles, while you're at it.
xxx
Vince was approaching Howard like he was a dangerous animal. He moved slowly with his hand out, palm up. He should have run by now but instead he was still there, still naked and still caring. Sometimes Vince's kindness made Howard hate himself even more.
Vince settled on his knees in front of Howard and slowly stroked Howard's thighs through his unbuttoned cords.
"I'm sorry, Howard, I didn't mean to yell at you. I know you're nervous. S'all right, Howard."
Every time it happened, Howard wondered if it would be forever this time. Maybe he'd never be able to speak again. It took four months of silence for his father to stop calling him "Little Man". His mother had gone the opposite route, only referring to him as "sweetie" or "darling" like she was trying to remind herself she loved the weird little stranger who had replaced her son.
Vince's hands moved to Howard's waist, hesitating a moment before pulling down the undone corduroys and pants.
Howard had remained half-hard even as Vince yelled at him. Now he could feel the younger man's breath on his skin and his body was responding shamelessly.
"S'all right, Howard," Vince promised, his tone reassuring but his big eyes full of worry. It wouldn't matter to Vince if Howard never spoke again. He'd create a new kind of sign language for just the two of them and spend the rest of their days intentionally mistranslating Howard's words: giving Howard cupcakes for breakfast when he asked for pancakes, signing Howard up for knitting classes instead of jazzercise. Vince would continue their double act forever. He's always rather assumed that when Vince found the right girl, he'd just bring her to live in the room he shared with Howard and Vince would remain single until he found a girl daft enough to go along with the arrangement. Vince was as loyal as the day was long. It would take a lot for Howard to chase him away.
Not that he hadn't given it the old college try.
Vince was hesitant as he took Howard in his mouth and he kept looking up at Howard as though looking for guidance , like Howard had a clue how to proceed. Vince hadn't seemed concerned about Howard's lack of skill or finesse. He'd simply used the varying coherence of Vince's mumbling as a guide. If he could understand what Vince was saying, he knew he wasn't applying enough pressure.
Howard touched the side of his friend's face and Vince's eyes closed as he began to suck Howard with more vigor and enthusiasm. Howard tangled his fingers in Vince's hair and tried very hard not to move.
"You're not stupid," he whispered. Just very misguided.
Vince paused his activities, leaving his hand wrapped around Howard's twitching cock, and gave Howard a cheeky grin, "Well, I'm not that bright either."
Howard bent over awkwardly and kissed Vince, hoping his friend would understand the things he seemed physically incapable of saying.
Vince looked a bit confused but he smiled brightly and took Howard back into his mouth. Howard tried to keep Vince from taking him too deeply and gagging until Vince yelled at him to, "quit bossin' me around!"
Howard touched Vince's face, tracing his pointed features until the younger man flushed and batted his hand away. Just when he thought he knew everything about his best mate, he learned something new. It was possible to make Vince self-conscious.
Would wonders ever cease?
Vince took Howard as deep as he could manage and worked the rest of his length with his hand, his other hand gently stroking Howard's rear end. Howard looked down in amazement, not even on the internet had he seen such a wildly erotic image and he'd once used Bob Fossil's computer without clearing the browser history first.
Howard stroked Vince's shiny black hair and mumbled inane things like: "thank you", "s'good" and "Oh, Vince". No clever turns of phrase for Howard Moon, no grand declarations. It was Howard's understanding that declarations of love to someone sucking your cock were not generally perceived as sincere.
Vince seemed to like hearing his name, he would moan at the sound and Howard felt the resulting vibrations all the way in his toes. He tried, "Thank you, Vince" and "So good, Vince" and was rewarded with a series of moans that were soon to be his undoing.
As much as he would have liked to prolong the activities, he was losing control and Vince's jaw was surely hurting.
"Nearly there, Vince. Nearly there."
Vince let Howard's cock slip from his mouth and looked up with his disconsertingly innocent eyes and asked, "Where do you want to come?"
The words made the question moot. When Howard opened his eyes, mortified, Vince was looking at his chest and pulling a face.
"Howard, that was well filthy!" Vince observed, astutely in Howard's opinion, before turning serious and asking, "S'all right, Howard?"
"More than all right, Little Man," Howard chuckled, still feeling a bit embarrassed about his loss of control, "Perfect. Amazing. Beautiful."
Howard ran his hand along Vince's jaw and hoped his friend knew he wasn't just talking about the blowjob.
xxx
Vince looked around for something to use for clean-up but Howard stepped in with a handkerchief that must of have been in the pocket of his cords. He flushed as Howard wiped his chest, the mundane task throwing the enormity of what had just happened into sharp relief.
Howard was pink and his squinty eyes had that smiley look that Vince was always trying to inspire. No way would Sebastian have appreciated this moment like Vince. He gave Howard a kiss on the cheek and was surprised when Howard moved in for a proper kiss before pulling Vince to his feet. Vince didn't let go of Howard's hand, he held it and stared at his feet as he asked Howard, "Wanna sleep in my bed? With me, that is? Both of us in the same bed?"
Howard looked uncomfortable but agreed before Vince could withdraw the invitation and turn it into a joke. Under the covers, Howard allowed himself to be properly snuggled. Vince tried to make himself feel sleepy but he'd already started getting hard again while going down on Howard and hearing his name in that raspy way. Lying in Howard's arms and feeling a big, warm hand stroking his back was only making the problem, well, grow.
He tried to find a position that would keep Howard from feeling his erection but the Northerner chastised him for squirming and Vince was promptly pinned to his friend's side, his hard-on pressed against Howard's hip.
Howard tucked Vince's hair behind his ear and ran his thumb along Vince's eyebrow.
"You're so beautiful," Howard said in a husky voice that immediately brought Vince to full-mast.
"I look like a Muppet in a fright wig."
Howard chuckled, his chest rumbling beneath Vince's cheek, "A very beautiful Muppet."
"Why did you give away my zoo jacket?"
It was the last thing he meant to say. It was like Howard-specific Tourette's. He fantasized about these meaningful little moments with Howard but any time there was a chance of things getting serious, Vince stomped on it until it crumbled like peanut brittle. He waited to be pushed away.
"I didn't see them," Howard answered, still stroking Vince's hair, "I just saw some old clothes at the bottom of the closet in a box. I only looked at what was on top and it was things you hadn't worn in years and years. I never would have gotten rid of the Zooniverse jacket or the How Moon? jacket. I'd have hid them in my closet and just taken everything else to the second hand shop."
Vince growled and mimed biting Howard's nipple. Then he licked it and Howard came as near to purring as the mature man of action would allow himself. He'd been hiding the jackets from himself, tired of seeing them and feeling sad.
Vince panicked for a moment when Howard rolled him onto his back but, this time, Howard didn't leave. He gave Vince a deep kiss, his tongue lightly running over Vince's teeth. The man had come a long way in a short time.
"I'm sorry about the jackets," Howard whispered between kisses, "I'm sorry I made you cry. I'm sorry I made you feel stupid."
Vince couldn't imagine holding a grudge when Howard was starting to get hard again.
"I'm not sorry I messed things up with Sebastian," Vince responded, with a cockiness he didn't feel, "I'm glad it was me, but I hope he still gives me the jacket back".
Howard tucked his face in Vince's shoulder, "I wouldn't worry. We could always send Tony Harrison after it."
Vince giggled, "Yeah, he'll be begging you to save him again. 'Oh, Howard! Take me in your big Northern arms!' How come when I ask you to carry me up the stairs, you say I'm too heavy?"
"Because I have to carry you up the stairs all the time when you pretend you're sleeping on the couch."
"I am sleeping!" Vince cried, "I just pretend not to wake up when you shake me."
"You're a brat."
"You love it."
"I love you."
The Northerner's big, cuddly body tensed up as soon as he said the words. Vince wrapped his arms and legs around Howard like face hugger from the Alien movies and said, "I love you, too," before he had a chance to escape.
Howard let out a heavy sigh and tucked his head back into Vince's shoulder.
"I'll never understand why."
Author: Concupid
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Vince/Howard and what's life without some surprises?
Summary: Howard's only good at talking about nonsense.
Warnings: graphic man love, sappiness, images that will inspire nightmares
Author's note: I'm cleaning up the mistakes as fast as I see them! Sorry for the more than usual number of errors!
Saboo's bedroom looked like a Voodoo whorehouse and it was working for Sebastian.
Saboo was running his fingers over Sebastian's ass and found the two small holes in the denim.
Holes from where Vince was apparently bitten by a homophobic snake.
When he'd met Vince, all he'd heard was "lapel", "How Moon", "Jack Cooper", "boots" and "buttons". Howard had filled in the rest later. Sometime before Sebastian had shoved his tongue down his throat.
"No pants?" Saboo said with a smirk as he worked his fingers into the holes.
"I'm wearing pants, dumbass, you're touching them right now," Sebastian snapped, wishing Saboo wouldn't talk. He was so beautiful but he was kind of a dick.
When Saboo looked confused, it clicked in Sebastian's brain, "Pants! Pants are underwear here. No, my pants are probably in Argentina hooking up with a g-string and I'm here, going commando in another man's fatigues."
"Christ, you're worse than Dennis," Saboo sneered, "A little second hand smoke and you're a retard."
"And hooking up with someone who thinks he's a fucking shaman. Don't forget, Malfoy, you were my third choice tonight: right after Magnum, PI and Joan Jett. You're just lucky weed makes me so horny," Sebastian retorted and he stroked Saboo through his tight black pants. Saboo didn't look quite so superior with his big brown eyes nearly rolling back in his head.
"Are those glasses even prescription or are they purely decoration?" Saboo asked as he pulled off Sebastian's glasses and looked through the lenses.
Sebastian blushed, "I have an astigmatism! You're hair looks like cotton candy."
"Hands off the hair!"
Sebastian's conscience whispered, You really should use a condom, as Sebastian allowed his/Vince's jeans to be tugged off, leaving him completely naked.
"Do you have any condoms?"
Saboo gave a superior sneer, "I'm a shaman."
"Does that mean you can do some kind of magic spell instead of using a rubber?" Sebastian asked as his conscience whispered, Seriously, use a condom! He's wearing leather pants!
"No," Saboo explained as he pulled a pack of condoms from his back pocket, "It means I get laid all the time. And I get a 10% discount at Shamansbury's."
Sebastian could barely hear his conscience over his own moans as it whispered, Really? Anal with a total stranger wearing leather pants? Don't swear so much, you sound slutty. Don't bite my hair!
No, that voice was real. That was Saboo.
Hey, that pink thing is watching. Tell him to go away. Don't let him watch! Don't let him join in! I don't care what shape his penis is, he DEFINITELY needs to wear a condom! Put one on each of his tentacles, while you're at it.
xxx
Vince was approaching Howard like he was a dangerous animal. He moved slowly with his hand out, palm up. He should have run by now but instead he was still there, still naked and still caring. Sometimes Vince's kindness made Howard hate himself even more.
Vince settled on his knees in front of Howard and slowly stroked Howard's thighs through his unbuttoned cords.
"I'm sorry, Howard, I didn't mean to yell at you. I know you're nervous. S'all right, Howard."
Every time it happened, Howard wondered if it would be forever this time. Maybe he'd never be able to speak again. It took four months of silence for his father to stop calling him "Little Man". His mother had gone the opposite route, only referring to him as "sweetie" or "darling" like she was trying to remind herself she loved the weird little stranger who had replaced her son.
Vince's hands moved to Howard's waist, hesitating a moment before pulling down the undone corduroys and pants.
Howard had remained half-hard even as Vince yelled at him. Now he could feel the younger man's breath on his skin and his body was responding shamelessly.
"S'all right, Howard," Vince promised, his tone reassuring but his big eyes full of worry. It wouldn't matter to Vince if Howard never spoke again. He'd create a new kind of sign language for just the two of them and spend the rest of their days intentionally mistranslating Howard's words: giving Howard cupcakes for breakfast when he asked for pancakes, signing Howard up for knitting classes instead of jazzercise. Vince would continue their double act forever. He's always rather assumed that when Vince found the right girl, he'd just bring her to live in the room he shared with Howard and Vince would remain single until he found a girl daft enough to go along with the arrangement. Vince was as loyal as the day was long. It would take a lot for Howard to chase him away.
Not that he hadn't given it the old college try.
Vince was hesitant as he took Howard in his mouth and he kept looking up at Howard as though looking for guidance , like Howard had a clue how to proceed. Vince hadn't seemed concerned about Howard's lack of skill or finesse. He'd simply used the varying coherence of Vince's mumbling as a guide. If he could understand what Vince was saying, he knew he wasn't applying enough pressure.
Howard touched the side of his friend's face and Vince's eyes closed as he began to suck Howard with more vigor and enthusiasm. Howard tangled his fingers in Vince's hair and tried very hard not to move.
"You're not stupid," he whispered. Just very misguided.
Vince paused his activities, leaving his hand wrapped around Howard's twitching cock, and gave Howard a cheeky grin, "Well, I'm not that bright either."
Howard bent over awkwardly and kissed Vince, hoping his friend would understand the things he seemed physically incapable of saying.
Vince looked a bit confused but he smiled brightly and took Howard back into his mouth. Howard tried to keep Vince from taking him too deeply and gagging until Vince yelled at him to, "quit bossin' me around!"
Howard touched Vince's face, tracing his pointed features until the younger man flushed and batted his hand away. Just when he thought he knew everything about his best mate, he learned something new. It was possible to make Vince self-conscious.
Would wonders ever cease?
Vince took Howard as deep as he could manage and worked the rest of his length with his hand, his other hand gently stroking Howard's rear end. Howard looked down in amazement, not even on the internet had he seen such a wildly erotic image and he'd once used Bob Fossil's computer without clearing the browser history first.
Howard stroked Vince's shiny black hair and mumbled inane things like: "thank you", "s'good" and "Oh, Vince". No clever turns of phrase for Howard Moon, no grand declarations. It was Howard's understanding that declarations of love to someone sucking your cock were not generally perceived as sincere.
Vince seemed to like hearing his name, he would moan at the sound and Howard felt the resulting vibrations all the way in his toes. He tried, "Thank you, Vince" and "So good, Vince" and was rewarded with a series of moans that were soon to be his undoing.
As much as he would have liked to prolong the activities, he was losing control and Vince's jaw was surely hurting.
"Nearly there, Vince. Nearly there."
Vince let Howard's cock slip from his mouth and looked up with his disconsertingly innocent eyes and asked, "Where do you want to come?"
The words made the question moot. When Howard opened his eyes, mortified, Vince was looking at his chest and pulling a face.
"Howard, that was well filthy!" Vince observed, astutely in Howard's opinion, before turning serious and asking, "S'all right, Howard?"
"More than all right, Little Man," Howard chuckled, still feeling a bit embarrassed about his loss of control, "Perfect. Amazing. Beautiful."
Howard ran his hand along Vince's jaw and hoped his friend knew he wasn't just talking about the blowjob.
xxx
Vince looked around for something to use for clean-up but Howard stepped in with a handkerchief that must of have been in the pocket of his cords. He flushed as Howard wiped his chest, the mundane task throwing the enormity of what had just happened into sharp relief.
Howard was pink and his squinty eyes had that smiley look that Vince was always trying to inspire. No way would Sebastian have appreciated this moment like Vince. He gave Howard a kiss on the cheek and was surprised when Howard moved in for a proper kiss before pulling Vince to his feet. Vince didn't let go of Howard's hand, he held it and stared at his feet as he asked Howard, "Wanna sleep in my bed? With me, that is? Both of us in the same bed?"
Howard looked uncomfortable but agreed before Vince could withdraw the invitation and turn it into a joke. Under the covers, Howard allowed himself to be properly snuggled. Vince tried to make himself feel sleepy but he'd already started getting hard again while going down on Howard and hearing his name in that raspy way. Lying in Howard's arms and feeling a big, warm hand stroking his back was only making the problem, well, grow.
He tried to find a position that would keep Howard from feeling his erection but the Northerner chastised him for squirming and Vince was promptly pinned to his friend's side, his hard-on pressed against Howard's hip.
Howard tucked Vince's hair behind his ear and ran his thumb along Vince's eyebrow.
"You're so beautiful," Howard said in a husky voice that immediately brought Vince to full-mast.
"I look like a Muppet in a fright wig."
Howard chuckled, his chest rumbling beneath Vince's cheek, "A very beautiful Muppet."
"Why did you give away my zoo jacket?"
It was the last thing he meant to say. It was like Howard-specific Tourette's. He fantasized about these meaningful little moments with Howard but any time there was a chance of things getting serious, Vince stomped on it until it crumbled like peanut brittle. He waited to be pushed away.
"I didn't see them," Howard answered, still stroking Vince's hair, "I just saw some old clothes at the bottom of the closet in a box. I only looked at what was on top and it was things you hadn't worn in years and years. I never would have gotten rid of the Zooniverse jacket or the How Moon? jacket. I'd have hid them in my closet and just taken everything else to the second hand shop."
Vince growled and mimed biting Howard's nipple. Then he licked it and Howard came as near to purring as the mature man of action would allow himself. He'd been hiding the jackets from himself, tired of seeing them and feeling sad.
Vince panicked for a moment when Howard rolled him onto his back but, this time, Howard didn't leave. He gave Vince a deep kiss, his tongue lightly running over Vince's teeth. The man had come a long way in a short time.
"I'm sorry about the jackets," Howard whispered between kisses, "I'm sorry I made you cry. I'm sorry I made you feel stupid."
Vince couldn't imagine holding a grudge when Howard was starting to get hard again.
"I'm not sorry I messed things up with Sebastian," Vince responded, with a cockiness he didn't feel, "I'm glad it was me, but I hope he still gives me the jacket back".
Howard tucked his face in Vince's shoulder, "I wouldn't worry. We could always send Tony Harrison after it."
Vince giggled, "Yeah, he'll be begging you to save him again. 'Oh, Howard! Take me in your big Northern arms!' How come when I ask you to carry me up the stairs, you say I'm too heavy?"
"Because I have to carry you up the stairs all the time when you pretend you're sleeping on the couch."
"I am sleeping!" Vince cried, "I just pretend not to wake up when you shake me."
"You're a brat."
"You love it."
"I love you."
The Northerner's big, cuddly body tensed up as soon as he said the words. Vince wrapped his arms and legs around Howard like face hugger from the Alien movies and said, "I love you, too," before he had a chance to escape.
Howard let out a heavy sigh and tucked his head back into Vince's shoulder.
"I'll never understand why."