(no subject)
ive never done drugs in my life. but right now im on some kind of energy pill called jet fuel or something. mike suggested i take it when i called him in tears this afternoon. ive got two twenty minute presentations due tomorrow and i called out of work today in order to finish them. plus ive been dealing with cramps which caused my to get hardly any sleep last night. so i called mike because i couldnt get myself to start on my schoolwork and i felt so full of anxiety. its five hours since i took the pills and my heart is racing so fast i can feel it in my chest, i cannot sit still, i keep typing stuff wrong, and my actions seem to happen before i even will them to. the good new is im just about finished with my schoolwork. also i might get fired after today but theyll be doing me a favor. ive already visualized telling the managers off, screaming swearwords (which i never use), throwing water in the h.r. manager's face, and ripping lots of merchandise off the shelves on my way out. i plan to make a scene. i always have. on friday one of my coworkers was fired and they had to call the cops because she supposedly made a scene. i can only assume mine will be ten times worse. it's something i almost look forward to. school's over for in a week and ive got august all to myself.