(no subject)
She sees it as a modern day romance.
I am, perhaps, the Simone de Beauvoir to her Sartre.
(eternally bound together in some philosophical misinterpretation of love and "the other?")
The idea is hopelessly romantic at best.
I don't really see magic in these things anymore. I don't really see the point.
maybe we're eternally linked, but through tragedy, not love.
we're linked through poor decision making and loss. not triumph. we didn't overcome anything.
you fall in love and then, it's gone.
you're left with the memories.
you can take them and tuck them away, safe and sound.
you can obsess over them and constantly compare you're present to the past.
or you can realize that these memories aren't reality.
They've become fiction, stories that help us or prevent us from falling asleep at night.
instead of seeing the world painted in love, you see things as they are.
You see the sadness behind every smile.
every love after that will only be what you make of it.
in your mind? or in your heart?
how much are you willing to give?
how much are you willing to lose?
what's left of all of this?
I saw a really great movie and they talk about how love is in your mind, not in your heart. it's thinking about somebody when you wake up in the morning and before you fall asleep at night. Love is a thought, or several thoughts, or all of your thoughts. It's giving somebody the greatest thing you can give, a place in your mind.
true love? meant to be? forever?
I don't know about any of that.
I'm really sick of hearing it.
I told her that this is the way I would have written it, whatever the meaning may be...
if true loves exists, if there is such a thing as fate.. it would be the same in my book.
I don't think I deserve much of a happy ending.. I don't even know if I want one. I probably couldn't handle it.
so, I'll settle..
you meet, fall in love and then, forever dwell on all the "what if's."
tragic, but real.
I would never end anything happily, because I don't think people are happy, not really anyway.
maybe simple minded people are happy. or maybe i'm just crazy. I don't know that either.
But I guess I just think too much, so much that I didn't hear one thing in class today..
I don't believe that you can really "know" anyone or that anyone can really "know" you. so, how can you love somebody, if you'll never be able to really know them, to understand what they feel and think. when they're alone, are they content? are they staring out a window, wishing for a different life? what does their smile mean? what do their tears mean? is it real? or are we all just acting out the scenes? playing parts? trying to find something that makes us feel a little less alone? We are alone. Nothing can change that.
this really doesn't mean much of anything. these past fews days have been crazy. questions. questions. questions.
I don't really have any answers... not good ones anyway.
does it matter? all of this will be a distant memory soon...
I'll probably be a stupid song that you'll hear every so often and think "what ever happened to that girl?" That's if I'm lucky.
Think about all the people you've met in the past 5 or 10 years. Think about how many of them you still talk to.
go into the future, has the list changed?
Who is permanent? who did you leave out?
weird. I can guarantee that most of the people I know today will be gone within the next 5 years.
so, that's my mind right now..
the end.
I am, perhaps, the Simone de Beauvoir to her Sartre.
(eternally bound together in some philosophical misinterpretation of love and "the other?")
The idea is hopelessly romantic at best.
I don't really see magic in these things anymore. I don't really see the point.
maybe we're eternally linked, but through tragedy, not love.
we're linked through poor decision making and loss. not triumph. we didn't overcome anything.
you fall in love and then, it's gone.
you're left with the memories.
you can take them and tuck them away, safe and sound.
you can obsess over them and constantly compare you're present to the past.
or you can realize that these memories aren't reality.
They've become fiction, stories that help us or prevent us from falling asleep at night.
instead of seeing the world painted in love, you see things as they are.
You see the sadness behind every smile.
every love after that will only be what you make of it.
in your mind? or in your heart?
how much are you willing to give?
how much are you willing to lose?
what's left of all of this?
I saw a really great movie and they talk about how love is in your mind, not in your heart. it's thinking about somebody when you wake up in the morning and before you fall asleep at night. Love is a thought, or several thoughts, or all of your thoughts. It's giving somebody the greatest thing you can give, a place in your mind.
true love? meant to be? forever?
I don't know about any of that.
I'm really sick of hearing it.
I told her that this is the way I would have written it, whatever the meaning may be...
if true loves exists, if there is such a thing as fate.. it would be the same in my book.
I don't think I deserve much of a happy ending.. I don't even know if I want one. I probably couldn't handle it.
so, I'll settle..
you meet, fall in love and then, forever dwell on all the "what if's."
tragic, but real.
I would never end anything happily, because I don't think people are happy, not really anyway.
maybe simple minded people are happy. or maybe i'm just crazy. I don't know that either.
But I guess I just think too much, so much that I didn't hear one thing in class today..
I don't believe that you can really "know" anyone or that anyone can really "know" you. so, how can you love somebody, if you'll never be able to really know them, to understand what they feel and think. when they're alone, are they content? are they staring out a window, wishing for a different life? what does their smile mean? what do their tears mean? is it real? or are we all just acting out the scenes? playing parts? trying to find something that makes us feel a little less alone? We are alone. Nothing can change that.
this really doesn't mean much of anything. these past fews days have been crazy. questions. questions. questions.
I don't really have any answers... not good ones anyway.
does it matter? all of this will be a distant memory soon...
I'll probably be a stupid song that you'll hear every so often and think "what ever happened to that girl?" That's if I'm lucky.
Think about all the people you've met in the past 5 or 10 years. Think about how many of them you still talk to.
go into the future, has the list changed?
Who is permanent? who did you leave out?
weird. I can guarantee that most of the people I know today will be gone within the next 5 years.
so, that's my mind right now..
the end.