(no subject)
AHH so this is the scoop on me lately....
- today sucked bean pie, i realized today im not social my yunger siblings are WAY more social then i am they had friends over and went to friends house..while im on the comuter...LOL today while i was on the computer my sister friend ask me "DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS?" wow that hurted me real bad that this yung girl sees me as the OUTKAST out of my other siblings TUFF HUH?? but do i have friends??? dunno this whole summer has been some straight trash my so called "frinds" from school never really called cept RONNETA only because im her "REBOUND" friend (shehad beef w/ her friends dat used her n now she uses me)u would think they would call me up and be like "lets go hang" NOOO my other sibling is living the life i want SOOOO BAD!!! she has friends whom she talks to all day all nite boys who crave for her every where she goes and is just so social ...dammit that should be me!! this is my senoir year and i hope it will be hott, but it seems like it wont....i was thinkin the other dat that hmm "ur not to social w/ the people in ur school, so who will seat/ dine with at PROM?? who will cheer for u when u get ur diploma??" i know im not a geek/loser i just feel that way like anytime i walk through the hallways some always say hi so im not as much as aloser as i think...BUT I AM ...in school they see me as a go hard semi stylish chic who is sooo GOOFY....but once im in the house total oppisite im just really fustrated at the fact dat summer is almost over and i havnt reallly went out WENT OUT...sure me and a friend form round the way went ridding in her car once, i met my lover too, went to TEXAS for 2 weeks, went to the gogo's twice, went to the mall twice, talked on the phone a few times but my summer still was FLUKE...
- ..continuing bout the phone...DAMN I HAVE A CELLPHONE, BUT WHY DO I NOT GET CALLS ?!?!? urrrrggh!!!i mean damn again my so called "FRIENDS" dont call i mean they knew they wouldnt see me this summer how come no calls?? my lovers...uhh where do i begin i mean my old lover calls every once in a while but gosh hes not doin nuffin CALL!! then my new lover hmm dunno bout him hes A PIMP!! but he should still call, then theirs my newest LOVER oo do i love dude...HE use to call every nite n will be on the phone forever but i guessed when he saw me N m new haircut he kinda went CRUD on me, damn i knew dat day i should had fixed it up but i was lazy but the other time he saw me i was h-o-t HOT he loved it but i still se him fadding away..DONT LEAVE ME NICK BOO!! but then at the same time i should call right? yea but they should know its not right 4 a girl to call first...though i always called my 2nd lover, and lol even got some other people to call him i do lust, want him but untill he shows dat 4 me and fuckin CALLS then yea....