some sense of closure
Before I begin I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for all the lovely messages I have been sent about Bear. I miss him dearly and it is wonderful to know how many others he touched. He truly was a magnificent creature and one that I will miss dearly every day.
It was a twisted stomach that brought his sudden death. Apparently common in large breeds, it’s when air enters the stomach and can’t be expelled; it’s not painful (I am told) but more uncomfortable, so the dog lies down. While the stomach is twisting it pinches a nerve that goes directly to the heart and they die. We have been told about over 15 dogs who have died the same way from people we know; it’s some what comforting but it doesn’t change the fact that he is gone and we want him back.
I have not been able to put some closure on any of this as we have yet to get back his remains. Morbid as this may sound I am stuck in an emotional limbo…. I have bursts of sadness and then moments of numbness and it’s all very confusing.
Work is overwhelming right now. I am starting to fret over things b/c there is no one there to help me as often as I need it. I need a set of instructions for many things but that requires people taking time away from their own jobs to help me. I want to keep this job, I love where I work. At the same time, I want some time off b/c I have been non-stop for so long. This last year of school was hell on earth and I feel as though life has yet to slow down a bit. What the line from that song; “here we go, way to fast; don’t slow down your gonna crash”.
It was a twisted stomach that brought his sudden death. Apparently common in large breeds, it’s when air enters the stomach and can’t be expelled; it’s not painful (I am told) but more uncomfortable, so the dog lies down. While the stomach is twisting it pinches a nerve that goes directly to the heart and they die. We have been told about over 15 dogs who have died the same way from people we know; it’s some what comforting but it doesn’t change the fact that he is gone and we want him back.
I have not been able to put some closure on any of this as we have yet to get back his remains. Morbid as this may sound I am stuck in an emotional limbo…. I have bursts of sadness and then moments of numbness and it’s all very confusing.
Work is overwhelming right now. I am starting to fret over things b/c there is no one there to help me as often as I need it. I need a set of instructions for many things but that requires people taking time away from their own jobs to help me. I want to keep this job, I love where I work. At the same time, I want some time off b/c I have been non-stop for so long. This last year of school was hell on earth and I feel as though life has yet to slow down a bit. What the line from that song; “here we go, way to fast; don’t slow down your gonna crash”.