cowardly lion?
i finished my fall 2009 semester this saturday and came home later that day. the words that i can describe my semester are these: stressful, learning, maturity, gratitude, & courage.
stressful because of all the exams and the realizations that i will be a real adult soon. even though i am in college and out of my parents house, i felt like i was still a kid because of the fact that school is a major priority in my life. but as graduation draws nearer certain decision need to be made soon like: should i apply to grad school? what kind of grad school do i wanna apply for? should i complete my 4 years of athletic eligibility or move on asap? where do i wanna intern? which school will take me? what are my chances??
learning is another aspect that continues to come along with me on my growing path of self-discovery. i've learned alot about myself through my personal issues and with the help of my counselor. i cant say that i've or found all of the things i've learned about myself praise-worthy but its nice to have recognized and come to terms about why i think or feel certain ways about things...
this whole disorder deal has also matured me a bit as well. even though i found myself to be more mature than people my age already, i feel an even bigger maturity gap between myself and my peers. im not a child nor is any one else around me, and so i feel that people need to WAKE UP and deal with their issues as well or at least recognize that the world is not some cupcake and strawberry frosted candyland. we are the people that can change things and need to stop being self-involved and quit acting like they are better than everyone else.
and finally i've recognized courage in my life. i know that i may not be the most courageous person in the world and that i carry many fears with me everyday, but what i've allowed for my coach, nutritionist, counselor, teammates, and family to do with me has made me feel almost fearless..This is exactly what it takes to let someone into your mind and deepest thoughts. letting others know what you feel at that exact moment in time, not being afraid to let your family that you have a problem, telling a man the most private things that have gone on during that week or even telling someone that you havent been taking the best care of yourself. being truthful about your weight... all of this has taken me courage to do.
ii am still fighting my inner battle and am struggling but i've made it a ways. i am done? no i'm not but hopefully my fears will not overtake me...
stressful because of all the exams and the realizations that i will be a real adult soon. even though i am in college and out of my parents house, i felt like i was still a kid because of the fact that school is a major priority in my life. but as graduation draws nearer certain decision need to be made soon like: should i apply to grad school? what kind of grad school do i wanna apply for? should i complete my 4 years of athletic eligibility or move on asap? where do i wanna intern? which school will take me? what are my chances??
learning is another aspect that continues to come along with me on my growing path of self-discovery. i've learned alot about myself through my personal issues and with the help of my counselor. i cant say that i've or found all of the things i've learned about myself praise-worthy but its nice to have recognized and come to terms about why i think or feel certain ways about things...
this whole disorder deal has also matured me a bit as well. even though i found myself to be more mature than people my age already, i feel an even bigger maturity gap between myself and my peers. im not a child nor is any one else around me, and so i feel that people need to WAKE UP and deal with their issues as well or at least recognize that the world is not some cupcake and strawberry frosted candyland. we are the people that can change things and need to stop being self-involved and quit acting like they are better than everyone else.
and finally i've recognized courage in my life. i know that i may not be the most courageous person in the world and that i carry many fears with me everyday, but what i've allowed for my coach, nutritionist, counselor, teammates, and family to do with me has made me feel almost fearless..This is exactly what it takes to let someone into your mind and deepest thoughts. letting others know what you feel at that exact moment in time, not being afraid to let your family that you have a problem, telling a man the most private things that have gone on during that week or even telling someone that you havent been taking the best care of yourself. being truthful about your weight... all of this has taken me courage to do.
ii am still fighting my inner battle and am struggling but i've made it a ways. i am done? no i'm not but hopefully my fears will not overtake me...