Settling
I think my life is settling arround itself again. I'm enjoying it more and it seems to be looking up again.
I'm not sure how long this will last, but I'm feeling really good.
Is it wrong of me to expect a downfall soon? It looks like I'm being set up for another gutpunch. I think.... I think I think to much...
It seems that I write most when I'm angsty, or depressed, or angry. I wonder why i can't just write when I feel like it. Like now for instance.
I don't really have anything to talk about, except that I'm kinda addicted to Death Cab for Cutie...
I might be going into this transitional housing program, they'll help me get a job and help me to live on my own. That'd be freaking awesome to be able to be self sufficent.... seeming as I was never taught how to fend for myself.
I was always taught to leech off of others, to hurt others to make myself feel better.
Ah there's the anger, I'm feeling it for my upbringing.... but hell upbringing has nothing to do wtih who I am now.
I am me.
Is that such an odd concept? I'm me. It's a simple statement that can mean so many things.
Being me is an interesting rush of being a total loser, and a completely hopeless romantic at the same time.
I'm back to my old feeling, that I should shoulder the world's problems and help everyone out. It's a beautiful thing to feel like I'm needed. To feel like someone actually cares about what I say, or what I do.
I think all I'm lacking right now is a warm body to sleep by.
That would make my life so much happier. A nice warm, caring, kind. gentle touch.
I think I'm gonna go to sleep now, I feel all nice and fuzzy.... and I should be getting to sleep anaways it's 5AM...
Maybe I'll go play a game or something, I don't feel like sleep.
bleh, I babble.
-Codi
I'm not sure how long this will last, but I'm feeling really good.
Is it wrong of me to expect a downfall soon? It looks like I'm being set up for another gutpunch. I think.... I think I think to much...
It seems that I write most when I'm angsty, or depressed, or angry. I wonder why i can't just write when I feel like it. Like now for instance.
I don't really have anything to talk about, except that I'm kinda addicted to Death Cab for Cutie...
I might be going into this transitional housing program, they'll help me get a job and help me to live on my own. That'd be freaking awesome to be able to be self sufficent.... seeming as I was never taught how to fend for myself.
I was always taught to leech off of others, to hurt others to make myself feel better.
Ah there's the anger, I'm feeling it for my upbringing.... but hell upbringing has nothing to do wtih who I am now.
I am me.
Is that such an odd concept? I'm me. It's a simple statement that can mean so many things.
Being me is an interesting rush of being a total loser, and a completely hopeless romantic at the same time.
I'm back to my old feeling, that I should shoulder the world's problems and help everyone out. It's a beautiful thing to feel like I'm needed. To feel like someone actually cares about what I say, or what I do.
I think all I'm lacking right now is a warm body to sleep by.
That would make my life so much happier. A nice warm, caring, kind. gentle touch.
I think I'm gonna go to sleep now, I feel all nice and fuzzy.... and I should be getting to sleep anaways it's 5AM...
Maybe I'll go play a game or something, I don't feel like sleep.
bleh, I babble.
-Codi