(no subject)
On the topic of my back.
As I mentioned last entry, my back's shot. Can't walk without the back starting to hurt, can't do anything strenuous without it REALLY hurting. Kind of Extremely limiting everything I can do. I'm not stupid. Not completely stupid, anyway. I'll grudgingly admit to being somewhat stupid, but it's not a total wash. Yet. I saw that there was a visit to the doctor ahead of me, and after visiting the back doctor last time to the tune of over $400 I was extremely hesitant to go that route. And don't even suggest chiropractors to me. Every time I go to those guys their repeated visits suck the bank account dry. Leaches. So, yeah. Needed an alternative.
Best alternative I could come up with was an inversion table. If you've seen the Teeter Hang-Ups commercials, you know what I mean. Or know the scene in one of the earlier Batman movies -- maybe the first Michael Keaton Batman -- where it shows him sleeping upside down, like a bat. That's inversion. Decrompresses the spine. That's what I needed, or so I thought. I found a couple of inversion tables on Amazon for less than $100 (or, less than a quarter of my last back doctor visit) and bought it. It arrived today.
After putting it together, my back was ruined. Lots of pain. I sat down in the recliner and made sure to read the precautions before I used the thing and was disheartened to see how many reasons I the manufacturer had given me to avoid the thing I had just put together. First, I weigh ten lbs more than the maximum allowed weight. Second, I'm extremely obese. (Yep, those are listed as two different reasons in the warnings section.) Third, I have an implant in a bone (my left shinbone). Fourth, I have a known back problem. (why else would I be using the thing to begin with?!) Fifth, I have high blood pressure. I put the damn book away and used it anyway. Caution be damned.
Here's what I learned extremely quickly after starting to recline: It wants to lean back, and it wants to lean back NOW. Had to hold on to the handlebars -- dunno if that's what they're called or not -- to keep from swinging around too quickly. Second, if you weigh 260 lbs, you're not meant to hang from your feet. Your feet just aren't built for that kind of punishment. Third, all the blood rushes to your head and face and you start to sweat IMMEDIATELY. Fourth, if you have a clogged up nose it's suddenly unclogged. Fifth, you can see the underside of that shelf, and it has a smileyface sticker on it.
After about ten seconds I had to flip back upright because my feet just couldn't take the weight. You're literally hanging from your feet -- the tops of your feet are holding you in place. It hurt. There wasn't enough padding to keep it from hurting too much to maintain. So I took off my shoes and tried it with socks. It was better, but not good enough. I figure I stayed upside down for a minute.
The upside -- after that minute, my back wasn't hurting. Proof that it works. Just need to pad the bars that hold my feet in.
Oh, also, it woke my ass up fiercly quick. I can see myself doing this for a few minutes in the morning as a quick wake-me-up. Better than caffeine.
As I mentioned last entry, my back's shot. Can't walk without the back starting to hurt, can't do anything strenuous without it REALLY hurting. Kind of Extremely limiting everything I can do. I'm not stupid. Not completely stupid, anyway. I'll grudgingly admit to being somewhat stupid, but it's not a total wash. Yet. I saw that there was a visit to the doctor ahead of me, and after visiting the back doctor last time to the tune of over $400 I was extremely hesitant to go that route. And don't even suggest chiropractors to me. Every time I go to those guys their repeated visits suck the bank account dry. Leaches. So, yeah. Needed an alternative.
Best alternative I could come up with was an inversion table. If you've seen the Teeter Hang-Ups commercials, you know what I mean. Or know the scene in one of the earlier Batman movies -- maybe the first Michael Keaton Batman -- where it shows him sleeping upside down, like a bat. That's inversion. Decrompresses the spine. That's what I needed, or so I thought. I found a couple of inversion tables on Amazon for less than $100 (or, less than a quarter of my last back doctor visit) and bought it. It arrived today.
After putting it together, my back was ruined. Lots of pain. I sat down in the recliner and made sure to read the precautions before I used the thing and was disheartened to see how many reasons I the manufacturer had given me to avoid the thing I had just put together. First, I weigh ten lbs more than the maximum allowed weight. Second, I'm extremely obese. (Yep, those are listed as two different reasons in the warnings section.) Third, I have an implant in a bone (my left shinbone). Fourth, I have a known back problem. (why else would I be using the thing to begin with?!) Fifth, I have high blood pressure. I put the damn book away and used it anyway. Caution be damned.
Here's what I learned extremely quickly after starting to recline: It wants to lean back, and it wants to lean back NOW. Had to hold on to the handlebars -- dunno if that's what they're called or not -- to keep from swinging around too quickly. Second, if you weigh 260 lbs, you're not meant to hang from your feet. Your feet just aren't built for that kind of punishment. Third, all the blood rushes to your head and face and you start to sweat IMMEDIATELY. Fourth, if you have a clogged up nose it's suddenly unclogged. Fifth, you can see the underside of that shelf, and it has a smileyface sticker on it.
After about ten seconds I had to flip back upright because my feet just couldn't take the weight. You're literally hanging from your feet -- the tops of your feet are holding you in place. It hurt. There wasn't enough padding to keep it from hurting too much to maintain. So I took off my shoes and tried it with socks. It was better, but not good enough. I figure I stayed upside down for a minute.
The upside -- after that minute, my back wasn't hurting. Proof that it works. Just need to pad the bars that hold my feet in.
Oh, also, it woke my ass up fiercly quick. I can see myself doing this for a few minutes in the morning as a quick wake-me-up. Better than caffeine.