inside and out
As I sat by my computer staring at his blinking screen name I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. This would be a lot harder than I thought. I decided that the only way to get over this, was to tell him how I felt. So I did. I wrote him an e-mail & explained everything. I'm hoping that I did the right thing. So much for "a clean break"...Of course I would contradict my last entry, I should have seen that coming since this has become a tradition recently. I had to let him know where I was coming from. He's not like most guys, he understood a lot more than most of them do. What I should have reminded myself was the fact that although he wasn't like most guys; he was still, without a doubt, guilty of receiving an x chromosome. Which would only allow him to follow their instincts uncontrollably. Any guy would've acted the same way he did. That's where I'm held responsible. But prolonging the "game" was something he had control over and he could have been less of a coward and taken another approach to this situation. I let go and I put it in pen (or on the keyboard, more so). I'm actually confident with my decision for once and I can already feel things getting better. I'd like to take this time to welcome back the old, but new, smarter and not so naive and vulnerable Liezl. I've missed ...me.
TUESDAY AUGUST 12, 2008 12:25PM
He understands. I feel like a ton of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. This is what pains me though, the fact that he actually does understand. Well, the "clean break" starts now..
TUESDAY AUGUST 12, 2008 12:25PM
He understands. I feel like a ton of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. This is what pains me though, the fact that he actually does understand. Well, the "clean break" starts now..