Thoughts now that I've read "Sailor Moon Short Stories #1"
My answer to the question “Who is your favorite Sailor Senshi?” has had a long and complicated history.
I discovered Sailor Moon through a friend at summer camp, oh so many years ago (1995? '96? Man, I have no idea anymore, but it was back when the show was first airing in the States). She had some magazines and little capsule figures of a few of the senshi, and I was immediately drawn to Sailor Jupiter because I was still at the age where I tended to prefer characters who looked the most like me (which basically meant she had brown hair and a ponytail, but still). Then I actually watched the show and it turned out she was my actual favorite because she was strong without being stereotypically “sporty” and that was something I really admired. But I couldn’t understand why she loved cooking so much, or dreamed of being a bride, or obsessed over boys so much. How could anyone want to be both so physically assertive and domestic at the same time? I certainly didn’t want that. Heck, most of my time in middle/high school was spent trying to *suppress* aspects of myself that I saw as stereotypically feminine, because wasn’t comfortable with the image of women and femininity that had been presented to me thus far. Lita was the closest I’d seen to the woman I wanted to be-but she wasn’t it, not exactly. So I tended to downplay or outright ignore her more feminine interests. And this is the way it was for a long time-years, really, even after I had moved away from Sailor Moon and basically stopped thinking about it.
Then I ended up rediscovering it after college- I saw a sub of Stars, I started rewatching the movies every so often, I poured over Materials Collection galleries, very gradually started rewatching the dub (I've made it through most of S and Supers in the past few months, just 5 episodes left), and then the retranslated manga came out, and lo and behold, I was thinking about Sailor Moon a lot again. And I started realizing that all of the Senshi were awesome. Everyone had little traits and quirks and characteristics that I could see in myself. And then I realized exactly how much I identified with Ami (bookish, introverted, easily embarrassed), how much I really, really liked Minako (basically a big cheerful goofball), and what a great heroine Sailor Moon is. So I waffled between the three of them as my favorites for a while.
But I had matured a lot in the past 10 years. I grew up, and defined for myself what it means to be a woman, and for me, it means something that isn't purely masculine or purely feminine. I enjoy mastering skills in cooking and making things for the people I love. I enjoy going to LAN parties and fragging and getting fragged by friends. I like wearing ties and suspenders, but you know, wearing skirts is actually pretty fun too. I like being surrounded by beauty and nature, and would prefer to experience it for myself than see a picture or hear about it second-hand, even if it means doing a 10-mile hike with a 50-pound backpack just to get there. As a little girl, I played with both Barbies and Go-Bots (just usually not at the same time; size disparity, you know); dinosaurs, Care Bears, Ninja Turtles, My Little Pony, Hot Wheels, Little Pet Shop, anything and everything that struck my fancy. And given all of this, I'm comfortable making the statement doing things that are traditionally seen as "masculine" or "feminine" does not mean the other half needs to be expunged or denied; it's possible for both to exist side-by-side. And really, no one exemplifies that better than Mako-chan. She may seem like a contradictory mix of characteristics, but she is loyal and passionate and true to herself, and even though does struggle occasionally with uniting the two halves of herself (which, really, isn't something that you see much in English media), at the end of the day, she really is confident and unapologetic about who she is, which is basically the greatest thing ever. Also, I love how other characters are at first intimidated by her physique and reputation but she is actually incredibly friendly and personable; she is seen hanging out with minor characters like Unazuki and Asanuma more than any of the other girls. Also, “The Melancholy of Mako-chan” resonated with me in a way that nothing else has done in quite a while.
A feeling I'm all too familiar with.
Really, I love all of the Senshi for one reason or another. I identify with all of them to some degree, and sort of hate picking a favorite. But despite all that, I’m now pretty darn confident that Makoto is really and truly my forever-girl. We're more alike than younger Citrus ever could have dreamed, and even though I needed to step away from the franchise to understand what she truly exemplified, it's sort of amazing that she was there all along, just waiting for me to be ready, not only to accept her as a complete character, but love her all the more because of it. <3
This image, though. AMI YOU KNOW ME TOO WELL XD I gotta go-- see ya!
I discovered Sailor Moon through a friend at summer camp, oh so many years ago (1995? '96? Man, I have no idea anymore, but it was back when the show was first airing in the States). She had some magazines and little capsule figures of a few of the senshi, and I was immediately drawn to Sailor Jupiter because I was still at the age where I tended to prefer characters who looked the most like me (which basically meant she had brown hair and a ponytail, but still). Then I actually watched the show and it turned out she was my actual favorite because she was strong without being stereotypically “sporty” and that was something I really admired. But I couldn’t understand why she loved cooking so much, or dreamed of being a bride, or obsessed over boys so much. How could anyone want to be both so physically assertive and domestic at the same time? I certainly didn’t want that. Heck, most of my time in middle/high school was spent trying to *suppress* aspects of myself that I saw as stereotypically feminine, because wasn’t comfortable with the image of women and femininity that had been presented to me thus far. Lita was the closest I’d seen to the woman I wanted to be-but she wasn’t it, not exactly. So I tended to downplay or outright ignore her more feminine interests. And this is the way it was for a long time-years, really, even after I had moved away from Sailor Moon and basically stopped thinking about it.
Then I ended up rediscovering it after college- I saw a sub of Stars, I started rewatching the movies every so often, I poured over Materials Collection galleries, very gradually started rewatching the dub (I've made it through most of S and Supers in the past few months, just 5 episodes left), and then the retranslated manga came out, and lo and behold, I was thinking about Sailor Moon a lot again. And I started realizing that all of the Senshi were awesome. Everyone had little traits and quirks and characteristics that I could see in myself. And then I realized exactly how much I identified with Ami (bookish, introverted, easily embarrassed), how much I really, really liked Minako (basically a big cheerful goofball), and what a great heroine Sailor Moon is. So I waffled between the three of them as my favorites for a while.
But I had matured a lot in the past 10 years. I grew up, and defined for myself what it means to be a woman, and for me, it means something that isn't purely masculine or purely feminine. I enjoy mastering skills in cooking and making things for the people I love. I enjoy going to LAN parties and fragging and getting fragged by friends. I like wearing ties and suspenders, but you know, wearing skirts is actually pretty fun too. I like being surrounded by beauty and nature, and would prefer to experience it for myself than see a picture or hear about it second-hand, even if it means doing a 10-mile hike with a 50-pound backpack just to get there. As a little girl, I played with both Barbies and Go-Bots (just usually not at the same time; size disparity, you know); dinosaurs, Care Bears, Ninja Turtles, My Little Pony, Hot Wheels, Little Pet Shop, anything and everything that struck my fancy. And given all of this, I'm comfortable making the statement doing things that are traditionally seen as "masculine" or "feminine" does not mean the other half needs to be expunged or denied; it's possible for both to exist side-by-side. And really, no one exemplifies that better than Mako-chan. She may seem like a contradictory mix of characteristics, but she is loyal and passionate and true to herself, and even though does struggle occasionally with uniting the two halves of herself (which, really, isn't something that you see much in English media), at the end of the day, she really is confident and unapologetic about who she is, which is basically the greatest thing ever. Also, I love how other characters are at first intimidated by her physique and reputation but she is actually incredibly friendly and personable; she is seen hanging out with minor characters like Unazuki and Asanuma more than any of the other girls. Also, “The Melancholy of Mako-chan” resonated with me in a way that nothing else has done in quite a while.
A feeling I'm all too familiar with.
Really, I love all of the Senshi for one reason or another. I identify with all of them to some degree, and sort of hate picking a favorite. But despite all that, I’m now pretty darn confident that Makoto is really and truly my forever-girl. We're more alike than younger Citrus ever could have dreamed, and even though I needed to step away from the franchise to understand what she truly exemplified, it's sort of amazing that she was there all along, just waiting for me to be ready, not only to accept her as a complete character, but love her all the more because of it. <3
This image, though. AMI YOU KNOW ME TOO WELL XD I gotta go-- see ya!