(no subject)
Aaaargh.
Okay. I went for a walk. There was fresh cool autumn air involved. I've eaten quite healthily...well, okay, the burger at dinner wasn't the BEST option, but I paired it with a salad and no dessert. I've gotten enough sleep. I'm in the library right now to do my work because I gave up on trying to get anything done in my room.
I'm still incredibly lethargic. I still feel listless and bleh, bordering on downright depressed. I keep having thoughts of dropping out and going into hiding somewhere. I don't care about my daydreams of working with birds, I don't care about my past daydreams of being a hotshot lit professor. I don't care about any of it. I just want to crawl into a hole. I keep making mistakes when I'm writing, my math skills are probably that much further down the drain--I almost never make mistakes when I'm typing. Like writing "aspect" instead of "accept", forgetting words. It just feels like everything's slipping by me. I'm not socializing. I'm just...sitting here in a fog that I can't shake, watching everything float by and not caring about any of it.
Would we agree that this isn't like me at all? Da, da, comrade, it's not. The only thing that even perks me at all is the idea of NaNoWriMo, and even that's just not really quite hitting it.
*headdesk* I have tried everything I know to do. Ever have those moments where you feel like you're drowning in misbehaving brain chemicals? I'm there.
I don't really know what to do about it. I'm almost too tired and lethargic to care. Somewhere there's a voice in me screaming and begging for a way to fix this, but nothing's working. I'm still...here.
Okay. I went for a walk. There was fresh cool autumn air involved. I've eaten quite healthily...well, okay, the burger at dinner wasn't the BEST option, but I paired it with a salad and no dessert. I've gotten enough sleep. I'm in the library right now to do my work because I gave up on trying to get anything done in my room.
I'm still incredibly lethargic. I still feel listless and bleh, bordering on downright depressed. I keep having thoughts of dropping out and going into hiding somewhere. I don't care about my daydreams of working with birds, I don't care about my past daydreams of being a hotshot lit professor. I don't care about any of it. I just want to crawl into a hole. I keep making mistakes when I'm writing, my math skills are probably that much further down the drain--I almost never make mistakes when I'm typing. Like writing "aspect" instead of "accept", forgetting words. It just feels like everything's slipping by me. I'm not socializing. I'm just...sitting here in a fog that I can't shake, watching everything float by and not caring about any of it.
Would we agree that this isn't like me at all? Da, da, comrade, it's not. The only thing that even perks me at all is the idea of NaNoWriMo, and even that's just not really quite hitting it.
*headdesk* I have tried everything I know to do. Ever have those moments where you feel like you're drowning in misbehaving brain chemicals? I'm there.
I don't really know what to do about it. I'm almost too tired and lethargic to care. Somewhere there's a voice in me screaming and begging for a way to fix this, but nothing's working. I'm still...here.