Not for the dirty minded

[chunniemonster]

I have finally come to terms with the fact that I hate my computer, but that is fine because I know that the feeling is mutual. I have tried being nice to it, I've tried firing positive vibes at it. I've even tried talking to it, but I now realise that our relationship was doomed from the beginning because we just don't understand each other. It has finally confided in me that I just don't turn it on any more and this apparently is the problem. I recently discovered how bad our relationship has turned. My computer has been having an affair with my boyfriend. He told me that his relationship with my computer was purely business, but I have since been informed that he's been turning it on, slipping his disc in, and giving it a good defragging whenever I'm not around. I wondered why my computer seemed to be in a much better mood these days. This week it happily allowed me to register over 100 books on bookcrossing without being obnoxious about it. I thought we had finally reached an understanding. I now realise it was feeling guilty!

But I'm not bothered. I have been having a textual relationship with my boyfriend's new mobile phone.