(no subject)
I couldn't go to work today. Why? Because I didn't have enough $ for gas! Isn't that a kick in the head! Now I have to scrounge, beg and
plead for cash to go tomorrow! It just never stops! The other day I had a blowout with both my sons. Why? I haven't the foggiest! They
didn't do a bloody thing wrong!!! I can't take it anymore! I don't know what to do! I work my tail off but its never enough! And now I can't even work as much as I need to because of $ shortages!! I know I shouldn't have but I had to lie to my supervisor about not attending work today! I said that I had car trouble. Which was not too far from the truth because I can't find $ for gas so technically it IS car trouble!
I don't know I'm always crying all the time! Some would say men aren't supposed to cry like I do! But, those are the guys who usually go pyscho! I'm hopeing that my boss will understand and let me work tomorrow! My family is wonderful about supporting me and my breakdowns, and so is my pastor! But I'm still confused! I'm not a bad person! why is this continuously happening to me? I work hard and deserve better! Oh I know my Christian friends will say I have to do gods work while I'm here and he will help me provide for my family! I feel terrible about my sons! I didn't mean to blow up at them! But I'm also frightened as well! I don't want to ruin my relationship with my boys. Oh, they've been good about it but I still feel bad! What frightens me is that I was unaware of what I was doing when I went at them! Thats called blind rage! And thats not good! I don't have insurance and I can't go see a therapist! But god help me, I don't have a clue what to do! I know you all must have better things to do then read about my nonsense! So I'll end it here. GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!
CROSS POSTED TO DEPRESSION AND CHRISTIANITY!!
plead for cash to go tomorrow! It just never stops! The other day I had a blowout with both my sons. Why? I haven't the foggiest! They
didn't do a bloody thing wrong!!! I can't take it anymore! I don't know what to do! I work my tail off but its never enough! And now I can't even work as much as I need to because of $ shortages!! I know I shouldn't have but I had to lie to my supervisor about not attending work today! I said that I had car trouble. Which was not too far from the truth because I can't find $ for gas so technically it IS car trouble!
I don't know I'm always crying all the time! Some would say men aren't supposed to cry like I do! But, those are the guys who usually go pyscho! I'm hopeing that my boss will understand and let me work tomorrow! My family is wonderful about supporting me and my breakdowns, and so is my pastor! But I'm still confused! I'm not a bad person! why is this continuously happening to me? I work hard and deserve better! Oh I know my Christian friends will say I have to do gods work while I'm here and he will help me provide for my family! I feel terrible about my sons! I didn't mean to blow up at them! But I'm also frightened as well! I don't want to ruin my relationship with my boys. Oh, they've been good about it but I still feel bad! What frightens me is that I was unaware of what I was doing when I went at them! Thats called blind rage! And thats not good! I don't have insurance and I can't go see a therapist! But god help me, I don't have a clue what to do! I know you all must have better things to do then read about my nonsense! So I'll end it here. GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!
CROSS POSTED TO DEPRESSION AND CHRISTIANITY!!