Emotional Vampires
No, they don't actually drain the blood from your neck
(although you may have a stiff neck by the time you flee),
but they do drain the joy from your life and remove any desire you have to spend
any more time with them. No wonder you're dazed and confused.
No wonder you don't feel good around them!
Emotional vampires do their best energetically to suck the life force right out
of you! Whether it's subconsciously or on purpose, these are the kinds of people
who hunt for victims to energize them simply, because they can't (or won't) tap
into their own spiritual energy source for revitalization.
Portrait of an emotional (or energetic) vampire:
Beyond their bad mood and self-pity and retelling of the same stories
(there's always a drama, story, or excuse),
emotional vampires are the sort who always seem to be depressed, angry, or helpless,
to the point where you suspect they may like it, because they're always using these as a way to get attention and pity.
This personality type will likely avoid direct questions or providing answers or always have a different excuse
and seem to happily take on the role of the victim and the helpless.
Nothing is ever their fault, it's as if they're helpless to change it and life just seems to happen
to them as if they had no part in the things about which they're forever complaining or using as an excuse,
or if they admit their role they act paralyzed as if incapable of changing or improving anything.
They will present delays, excuses or just act helpless.
Emotional vampires have negative things to say about everyone and everything
and make a habit of telling you all about their problems and pet peeves -
as if they are the only ones who exist and must contend with the challenges of life.
They'll always find a way to change the subject back to themselves and their situation.
They're always the victim. Even when they admit, they act as if there's nothing they can do, they're helpless.
Emotional vampires have no clue when they've worn you thin, and the more patient
and understanding you are,
the more the dishing and the bloodsucking will continue.
How you know you've been zapped?
Almost anyone can take a certain amount of anything -
energetic bloodsucking included - which may be why we often question
if there really is a problem with these people, or if we're just too sensitive.
Here are the telltale signs you've been zapped:
If you were anxious or upset at the beginning of your conversation,
you'll probably feel worse after time spent with one of these energy drainers.
Emotional vampires don't offer empathy or try to soothe the people around them,
instead they find ways to provoke your angst for them even further.
Likewise, you may experience increased insomnia or wonder where your anxiety
build-up is coming from without being able to pinpoint the cause.
And, if you were feeling just fine before speaking with them,
you may find yourself irked by their constant need to focus on your insecurities
and bring them to the forefront when they were on the back-burner.
How to protect yourself:
For starters, don't feel too bad - emotional vampires walk into any room and
suck the life energy from anyone unlucky enough to engage them.
In fact, if you don't walk into their space, it's likely that they'll scan the
room for a victim and walk into yours.
Some emotional vampires know what they are doing; others do it on an unconscious level.
Those who are unaware tend to have very difficult relationships, home lives and work interactions
until they recognize what they are doing.
Those who know they're doing it.. better steer clear than try to understand.
Either way, in order to protect yourself from their bloodsucking, you have two options.
First, you can tell them the truth - that you feel physically or emotionally drained around them
and that the relationship feels one-sided to you.
Let them know what you want from them. They'll either wake up or move on.
Second, if that doesn't work (or you've tried it before (again and again),
avoid them, don't take their calls and do not spend any more time with them.
If you must interact for work reasons or at family gatherings, set good temporal boundaries
and don't stay with them any longer than necessary. And don't let them corner you!
It's not your job to bring the cold, detached, insensitive and inconsiderate back from the dead.
(although you may have a stiff neck by the time you flee),
but they do drain the joy from your life and remove any desire you have to spend
any more time with them. No wonder you're dazed and confused.
No wonder you don't feel good around them!
Emotional vampires do their best energetically to suck the life force right out
of you! Whether it's subconsciously or on purpose, these are the kinds of people
who hunt for victims to energize them simply, because they can't (or won't) tap
into their own spiritual energy source for revitalization.
Portrait of an emotional (or energetic) vampire:
Beyond their bad mood and self-pity and retelling of the same stories
(there's always a drama, story, or excuse),
emotional vampires are the sort who always seem to be depressed, angry, or helpless,
to the point where you suspect they may like it, because they're always using these as a way to get attention and pity.
This personality type will likely avoid direct questions or providing answers or always have a different excuse
and seem to happily take on the role of the victim and the helpless.
Nothing is ever their fault, it's as if they're helpless to change it and life just seems to happen
to them as if they had no part in the things about which they're forever complaining or using as an excuse,
or if they admit their role they act paralyzed as if incapable of changing or improving anything.
They will present delays, excuses or just act helpless.
Emotional vampires have negative things to say about everyone and everything
and make a habit of telling you all about their problems and pet peeves -
as if they are the only ones who exist and must contend with the challenges of life.
They'll always find a way to change the subject back to themselves and their situation.
They're always the victim. Even when they admit, they act as if there's nothing they can do, they're helpless.
Emotional vampires have no clue when they've worn you thin, and the more patient
and understanding you are,
the more the dishing and the bloodsucking will continue.
How you know you've been zapped?
Almost anyone can take a certain amount of anything -
energetic bloodsucking included - which may be why we often question
if there really is a problem with these people, or if we're just too sensitive.
Here are the telltale signs you've been zapped:
If you were anxious or upset at the beginning of your conversation,
you'll probably feel worse after time spent with one of these energy drainers.
Emotional vampires don't offer empathy or try to soothe the people around them,
instead they find ways to provoke your angst for them even further.
Likewise, you may experience increased insomnia or wonder where your anxiety
build-up is coming from without being able to pinpoint the cause.
And, if you were feeling just fine before speaking with them,
you may find yourself irked by their constant need to focus on your insecurities
and bring them to the forefront when they were on the back-burner.
How to protect yourself:
For starters, don't feel too bad - emotional vampires walk into any room and
suck the life energy from anyone unlucky enough to engage them.
In fact, if you don't walk into their space, it's likely that they'll scan the
room for a victim and walk into yours.
Some emotional vampires know what they are doing; others do it on an unconscious level.
Those who are unaware tend to have very difficult relationships, home lives and work interactions
until they recognize what they are doing.
Those who know they're doing it.. better steer clear than try to understand.
Either way, in order to protect yourself from their bloodsucking, you have two options.
First, you can tell them the truth - that you feel physically or emotionally drained around them
and that the relationship feels one-sided to you.
Let them know what you want from them. They'll either wake up or move on.
Second, if that doesn't work (or you've tried it before (again and again),
avoid them, don't take their calls and do not spend any more time with them.
If you must interact for work reasons or at family gatherings, set good temporal boundaries
and don't stay with them any longer than necessary. And don't let them corner you!
It's not your job to bring the cold, detached, insensitive and inconsiderate back from the dead.