(no subject)
me and alex just ended our loving as scumbag and pussy cat. It makes me feel free while being sad at the same time. i had something hanging over my head the past few months and I couldn't figure out what it was but I felt lighter and relieved somewhat when he let me go. I need to learn how to stop attaching myself to people like that anyway. Making them responsible for my happiness. Life's a trip. Around and around back and forth. I leave but I will return. I got love for all my felines out there. He likes street, I like ocean. If there's is one thing I love it's the ocean and being there with someone who loves it just as much. Even though Buddah's a prick I will always love him because of the time we had at the beach and how much he feels home there. There are so many ways to get to the same place. I love variation and changes. I live for different flavors. Our relationship kind of plateaud and that was it there's no more life if there's no more change. I wish I could stop crying it's been 5 days. I'm in a cafe in L.A. right now. I know that people who read this don't necissarily need to know but I am an open book anyone who meets me gets to see into my brain. Plus I simply want everyone to know how I'm doing so I don't have to do the same conversation 78 times like I do with my crash. I still get to explain the story and it's been 7 months. I love you all and my face will always radiate satisfaction even with all the unstable disturbing things that occur in one's life. Because today is 24 hours hopefully there will be many more to fill with color, depression, love, death, and beauty. There is something about comming close enough to death to say FUCK YOU that makes me love my days much more. I ain't scared of much these days.