Missing Dad
It has been 5 years since my Dad was called home to heaven. Yet, not a day goes by when I don't think about him. My worst nightmare came true on Dec. 24th, 2009. The only bright side is that our family was all together when we got that call. We grieved, yet we celebrated - celebrated Christmas, and celebrated his life. I miss my Dad so much. I was scared when he got sick. I was devastated when he left. To this day, I sometimes still feel that he is just back in the Philippines. It is only during those times when I feel the urge to read his emails or text messages that I remember that he is no longer with us. At least for now.
There are times when I catch myself staring into space. When I do, I can still clearly see his face. And I am thankful for that. I hope to never forget how his smile looks like or the crooked grin he has when he finds something amusing. My Dad meant the world to me. I guess this is probably the reason why that even though it's been several years, there are nights (like tonight), that it feels like it just happened yesterday. I still feel that raw void in my chest and it hurts. I don't know if that will ever be filled up. All I know is that a part of me died with him.
I feel very sad. And very lonely. I miss him so much.
There are times when I catch myself staring into space. When I do, I can still clearly see his face. And I am thankful for that. I hope to never forget how his smile looks like or the crooked grin he has when he finds something amusing. My Dad meant the world to me. I guess this is probably the reason why that even though it's been several years, there are nights (like tonight), that it feels like it just happened yesterday. I still feel that raw void in my chest and it hurts. I don't know if that will ever be filled up. All I know is that a part of me died with him.
I feel very sad. And very lonely. I miss him so much.