Ladies and Gentlemen
So I have this idea for a movie. Now, I'm no screenwriter, so it probably sucks, but I think it'd be a good basis for a movie at least. It's called (or rather, I have named it in my head) "Ladies and Gentlemen." It's basically about young adults (22-25 years old) who are each trying to figure it all out - and by "it all" I mean relationships. It would be a drama, with some humor involved - but overall it would be a dark movie; dark in that it does not paint a pretty picture about finding love. Because, lets face it, for the most part it isn't fun, it isn't pretty, and it sure as hell isn't easy, the way so many romantic comedies portray relationships. It is, however, almost all-consuming for people in that age group, whether people recognize it or not. What makes this movie dark is that pretty much all of the characters involved cheat on each other. (Mind you, I did just watch "Closer" the other day.) They are likeable characters, but for one reason or another (and all angles would be shown) they are drawn to be less than faithful to their significant others. The movie wouldn't support cheating, but it would show why it happens so much. It would be an honest movie.
There would be a main couple, both of which cheat on each other. Other things complicate their relationship, which almost forces them to do what they do. It is a sort of "test" if you will. Because of their complications (which I'm still working on) the girl in the relationship (we'll call her Annie) feels like she has to "make sure" that Jeremy is the one for her - thus, she goes out with other guys. Jeremy, on the other hand, is not over his ex (Rebecca) and so he cheats on Annie in order to get over her, but of course things become a bit more complicated than that. And the movie would go on from there, looking at other relationships related to Annie and Jeremy's. It would focus on all the different ways people cheat, reasons people cheat, why they justify cheating, continue cheating, and for some, eventually stop cheating.
Now, the fact that I want to write a movie about cheating makes me wonder about my own views on the topic. I used to be avidly against cheating, but I'm not so sure anymore. My definition of cheating has even changed. Look at it this way, if you're in a relationship that's starting to get serious (I mean real serious) and you're like, "shit I don't know about this," it may not be a bad thing. By "shit I don't know" I just mean you're nervous about taking a big step, not that you don't love the person anymore. It's called cold feet, and it happens all the time - I've never known a relationship where it didn't. So why not, just before things get super serious, test the relationship? It's certainly better than realizing 5 years after you're married that you just couldn't make it. The greatest test of love is letting it go. If you really love someone, you have to be able to let them go. If, after your "test" you both come back to each other then you're stronger and more connected, if you don't, then it wasn't meant to be in the first place. That's what people are afraid of finding out. Being afraid of the truth means you'll just hide from it. But the truth will eventually win; it has yet to lose a battle. And, furthermore, the longer you hide from the truth, the more of a mess you've created by the time the truth is eventually revealed. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that testing a relationship, or taking a break (even when things are good), or seeing other people part-time, may not be a bad thing. If it is in the open, it can't hurt anybody. It does require a great amount of maturity and control, however, and this is where people struggle the most. It can, and should, be done however.
I realize that I probably sound like the worst girlfriend in the world, but if you think about it (and not judge me) then it makes perfect sense. Why wait to test a relationship when it's too late? Why always wonder if you are with the right person? Why limit yourself? I think people my age take relationships way too seriously. There are no rings on my, or any of my friends fingers. We're not in these things for the long haul - and if we are - what's the harm in making sure it's supposed to last? If you can handle risking your love, and you can work through time apart, then in the end your bond with the other person is made so much stronger. And, if by chance you can't make it through that, then your love wasn't meant to last in the first place.
Now, this would be the underlying message of my movie. Although people wouldn't want to hear it, they can't deny that it makes at least a little sense. The characters in the movie would not do this exactly. What I'm talking about with "testing" a relationship isn't exactly cheating - the "test" is fair, has rues, and is out in the open - where cheating is composed of none of those components. Because of that, the characters in the movie will have much more trouble than they asked for - although their intentions weren't always bad, the outcomes were because of lies, complications, secrets, and so on. The movie would support "testing" relationships, taking things slow, not limiting yourself, and understanding that anything can happen so you always have to be ready for it - the movie would not support cheating as we commonly think of it. Nor would the movie be all about sex. A lot of it would be of course because that is what usually defines cheating, and what drives many people to cheat - but it would also be about all of the emotions related to that act. I don't know if this would ever make a decent movie, and it probably wouldn't (because I'm no screenwriter), but I think the premise is a good one. I think people could learn from it, I think it would be very honest. It would be honest about the realities of relationships, people cheat, almost all relationships end (hell over half of marriages do), people put their own interests first, lying is always an easy way out, and everyone has at least a few skeletons in their closet.
There would be a main couple, both of which cheat on each other. Other things complicate their relationship, which almost forces them to do what they do. It is a sort of "test" if you will. Because of their complications (which I'm still working on) the girl in the relationship (we'll call her Annie) feels like she has to "make sure" that Jeremy is the one for her - thus, she goes out with other guys. Jeremy, on the other hand, is not over his ex (Rebecca) and so he cheats on Annie in order to get over her, but of course things become a bit more complicated than that. And the movie would go on from there, looking at other relationships related to Annie and Jeremy's. It would focus on all the different ways people cheat, reasons people cheat, why they justify cheating, continue cheating, and for some, eventually stop cheating.
Now, the fact that I want to write a movie about cheating makes me wonder about my own views on the topic. I used to be avidly against cheating, but I'm not so sure anymore. My definition of cheating has even changed. Look at it this way, if you're in a relationship that's starting to get serious (I mean real serious) and you're like, "shit I don't know about this," it may not be a bad thing. By "shit I don't know" I just mean you're nervous about taking a big step, not that you don't love the person anymore. It's called cold feet, and it happens all the time - I've never known a relationship where it didn't. So why not, just before things get super serious, test the relationship? It's certainly better than realizing 5 years after you're married that you just couldn't make it. The greatest test of love is letting it go. If you really love someone, you have to be able to let them go. If, after your "test" you both come back to each other then you're stronger and more connected, if you don't, then it wasn't meant to be in the first place. That's what people are afraid of finding out. Being afraid of the truth means you'll just hide from it. But the truth will eventually win; it has yet to lose a battle. And, furthermore, the longer you hide from the truth, the more of a mess you've created by the time the truth is eventually revealed. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that testing a relationship, or taking a break (even when things are good), or seeing other people part-time, may not be a bad thing. If it is in the open, it can't hurt anybody. It does require a great amount of maturity and control, however, and this is where people struggle the most. It can, and should, be done however.
I realize that I probably sound like the worst girlfriend in the world, but if you think about it (and not judge me) then it makes perfect sense. Why wait to test a relationship when it's too late? Why always wonder if you are with the right person? Why limit yourself? I think people my age take relationships way too seriously. There are no rings on my, or any of my friends fingers. We're not in these things for the long haul - and if we are - what's the harm in making sure it's supposed to last? If you can handle risking your love, and you can work through time apart, then in the end your bond with the other person is made so much stronger. And, if by chance you can't make it through that, then your love wasn't meant to last in the first place.
Now, this would be the underlying message of my movie. Although people wouldn't want to hear it, they can't deny that it makes at least a little sense. The characters in the movie would not do this exactly. What I'm talking about with "testing" a relationship isn't exactly cheating - the "test" is fair, has rues, and is out in the open - where cheating is composed of none of those components. Because of that, the characters in the movie will have much more trouble than they asked for - although their intentions weren't always bad, the outcomes were because of lies, complications, secrets, and so on. The movie would support "testing" relationships, taking things slow, not limiting yourself, and understanding that anything can happen so you always have to be ready for it - the movie would not support cheating as we commonly think of it. Nor would the movie be all about sex. A lot of it would be of course because that is what usually defines cheating, and what drives many people to cheat - but it would also be about all of the emotions related to that act. I don't know if this would ever make a decent movie, and it probably wouldn't (because I'm no screenwriter), but I think the premise is a good one. I think people could learn from it, I think it would be very honest. It would be honest about the realities of relationships, people cheat, almost all relationships end (hell over half of marriages do), people put their own interests first, lying is always an easy way out, and everyone has at least a few skeletons in their closet.