[Entry #88] HAPPY NEW YEAR
Happy New Year!!
I just had new years dinner with family. and now am holing up in my room to FINISH MY HOMEWORK.
but let's forget about that and talk about 2010.
2010. From January-August it was hands done, one of the best years of my life. It started with me watching Johnny's Countdown in Japan, making great friends, making wnoderful memories with those friends and experiencing the most wonderful things possible. I loved my time in Japan. I will say those once, i will say this a thousand times. Hands down, best thing that has ever happened to my life (so far - I'm open for better things ;D). Now you're probably wondering what happened after August? ... I'll name it. I came back home. And school started. Let's say it's karma? But who knows. I knew that going back to school would be tough. I knew leaving Japan would be tough.... what I didn't realize was HOW LONG the hardships would be. I thought maybe a month or so and it'd be fine. But it's been quite long past a "month or so".
So honestly, from September-Now... 2010 hasn't been the greatest year I could've had. It was filled with lots of stress, many, many headaches, panic attacks, and many days were i found myself waiting desperately to talk to my exchange-student friends so i can feel that sense of happiness that i had lost ever since I left Japan. My friends back home just don't match up anymore. School? Not my best school term I don't think. As I've said many times before I spent a lot of it freaking out about my marks, trying desperately to raise them up to standard. There were a lot of times were I would take naps throughout the day, not because I was tired (well I was) but because I was probably feeling something close to depression. And sleep was how i got rid of it. For some people it's eating, for others drinking, for me? I slept. And let me tell you, I slept a lot. And it's not cause I was 'growing' cause i haven't grown at all.
so for 2011... I'm not someone who really celebrates New Years much, not the idea of it. I guess because before I didn't need to. I was honestly a happy kid. I didn't need "fresh starts". To me New Years was just another day in my awesome life. But for once, i finally realize why people see New Years as a fresh start. Because this is what I want now. A fresh start.
Of course I'm gonna have to trigger this start my self... so wish me luck yeah? ^_^
I just had new years dinner with family. and now am holing up in my room to FINISH MY HOMEWORK.
but let's forget about that and talk about 2010.
2010. From January-August it was hands done, one of the best years of my life. It started with me watching Johnny's Countdown in Japan, making great friends, making wnoderful memories with those friends and experiencing the most wonderful things possible. I loved my time in Japan. I will say those once, i will say this a thousand times. Hands down, best thing that has ever happened to my life (so far - I'm open for better things ;D). Now you're probably wondering what happened after August? ... I'll name it. I came back home. And school started. Let's say it's karma? But who knows. I knew that going back to school would be tough. I knew leaving Japan would be tough.... what I didn't realize was HOW LONG the hardships would be. I thought maybe a month or so and it'd be fine. But it's been quite long past a "month or so".
So honestly, from September-Now... 2010 hasn't been the greatest year I could've had. It was filled with lots of stress, many, many headaches, panic attacks, and many days were i found myself waiting desperately to talk to my exchange-student friends so i can feel that sense of happiness that i had lost ever since I left Japan. My friends back home just don't match up anymore. School? Not my best school term I don't think. As I've said many times before I spent a lot of it freaking out about my marks, trying desperately to raise them up to standard. There were a lot of times were I would take naps throughout the day, not because I was tired (well I was) but because I was probably feeling something close to depression. And sleep was how i got rid of it. For some people it's eating, for others drinking, for me? I slept. And let me tell you, I slept a lot. And it's not cause I was 'growing' cause i haven't grown at all.
so for 2011... I'm not someone who really celebrates New Years much, not the idea of it. I guess because before I didn't need to. I was honestly a happy kid. I didn't need "fresh starts". To me New Years was just another day in my awesome life. But for once, i finally realize why people see New Years as a fresh start. Because this is what I want now. A fresh start.
Of course I'm gonna have to trigger this start my self... so wish me luck yeah? ^_^