...my fears come alive, in this place where i once died...
ok yeah. i want to come home. i know i keep saying that, but it just keeps gettin worse. i miss everyone SO much. it's ridiculous. i love you guys. in a way this is good though, it'll be a while before i take for granted how amazing my friends are. i never realized how much i needed you guys until i had to be away from you. i love you all and i mean that. no sarcasm, for once.
yeah, so right now i'm sitting in dad's office where i've been sitting since 9 am. i woke up at 7, how fucked is that? it didn't help that i couldn't sleep until 3 last night either. damn i hate insomnia. bet it happens again tonight. fuck.
so the only reason i agreed to come to work with dad is because other wise i would spend the entire day home alone. at least like this i am in a public place, so no matter what my urges towards self-harm are, i can't act on them. so really i'm doing this for you guys because i don't really mind when i cut myself that much. so you best be greatful because i woke up at 7 damnit. ugh.
so what did i do today? well...i sat online. for a while i tried to make little animations, but then i gave up because i realized that i don't care. after that i talked to roxanne and amy a bit. that was nice. i miss them. god damn it, i miss everyone. this is killing me i swear. ok, and after talking to them....me and roxy played online pool. i won. very exciting i know. other then that i've just been chilling listening to my music and trying to forget how much i want to go home. occasionally it works, but not that often.
so yeah, i talked to remy and amy on the phone yesterday. that was probably the highlight of my entire week. seriously. ahhhhh, i have never wanted to go home so bad in my life. this is ridiculous.
man, i'm really hungry, but the only food i have with me is a sandwich i made this morning, so it's soggy by now. i'm contemplating how long it's going to take before i'm so hungry i don't care about the soggy. i give myself half an hour, tops. i probably won't even make it that long. maybe i can convince dad to take me to go get food. that would be nice. there's a chevy's down the street and i'm not above take out. yeah, i think i'll try for that.
ok well, i'm going to leave you guys alone for a while because i'm sure you're sick of listening to me complain. so i love you all and i miss you THIS MUCH. i know you can't see how wide apart i'm holding my hands, but it's really far apart. like as far as i can reach. it's alot. ok so i love you. muah.
anna
yeah, so right now i'm sitting in dad's office where i've been sitting since 9 am. i woke up at 7, how fucked is that? it didn't help that i couldn't sleep until 3 last night either. damn i hate insomnia. bet it happens again tonight. fuck.
so the only reason i agreed to come to work with dad is because other wise i would spend the entire day home alone. at least like this i am in a public place, so no matter what my urges towards self-harm are, i can't act on them. so really i'm doing this for you guys because i don't really mind when i cut myself that much. so you best be greatful because i woke up at 7 damnit. ugh.
so what did i do today? well...i sat online. for a while i tried to make little animations, but then i gave up because i realized that i don't care. after that i talked to roxanne and amy a bit. that was nice. i miss them. god damn it, i miss everyone. this is killing me i swear. ok, and after talking to them....me and roxy played online pool. i won. very exciting i know. other then that i've just been chilling listening to my music and trying to forget how much i want to go home. occasionally it works, but not that often.
so yeah, i talked to remy and amy on the phone yesterday. that was probably the highlight of my entire week. seriously. ahhhhh, i have never wanted to go home so bad in my life. this is ridiculous.
man, i'm really hungry, but the only food i have with me is a sandwich i made this morning, so it's soggy by now. i'm contemplating how long it's going to take before i'm so hungry i don't care about the soggy. i give myself half an hour, tops. i probably won't even make it that long. maybe i can convince dad to take me to go get food. that would be nice. there's a chevy's down the street and i'm not above take out. yeah, i think i'll try for that.
ok well, i'm going to leave you guys alone for a while because i'm sure you're sick of listening to me complain. so i love you all and i miss you THIS MUCH. i know you can't see how wide apart i'm holding my hands, but it's really far apart. like as far as i can reach. it's alot. ok so i love you. muah.
anna