All you could ever want to know about German history (and so much more . . .)
Lol, I can only laugh right now. I got a 18/30 on my German History exam. That is, according to the calculator on my phone, officially a 59.97% . . . depending on how many threes you put after the decimal point. This means that I passed . .. I think. I'm pretty sure that passing, depending on if the passing grade at MHC is 60% or 65% . . . I'm really hoping it's 60%.
At first glance, one might think that this score is ridiculously low. You might be asking me (in your head of course, because I'm in Germany and not right in front of you), "Larissa! Did you actually study?" I actually did . . . for quite a bit of time. I didn't kill myself like at MHC, but I made myself a study guide and memorized a long list of shit to the point where I felt I knew quite a lot about German history. However, when the test came, I was quite shocked. Let's look at some of these test questions, shall we?
1. For each of the following events, please give the correct year in which it took place:
The Congress of Vienna: 1813 (correct answer, 1815)
End of the First World War: 1918
Firing of Bismarck: 1890
Peace of Augsburg: 1555
Peace of Westfallen: 1648
End of the Holy Roman Empire: 1807 (correct answer, 1806)
July Revolution: 1830
Defenestration of Prague: 1618
German-Danish War: 1864
Entry of Sweden in the 30 Years War: 1630
Kapp-Luettwitz-Putsch: . . . have no idea what it is, but it happened in 1920
Beginning of the Rule of William II: 1888
2. Please give the exact date for each of the following events:
Publication of Martin Luther's 95 Theses: October 31, 1517
Beginning of WWII: August .. .1939 (correct answer: September 1, 1939)
Hitler's Takeover: May . . . 1935 (correct answer: January 30, 1933)
Storm on the Bastille: July 14, 1789
Founding of the German Empire: January 18, 1871
3. Please give the years of birth and death for the following people:
Konrad Adenauer: had no idea . .. I now know he was the first president of Western Germany and lived from 1876 to 1967
Emperor Karl V: 1512-1540 (I didn't memorize when people were born, only when they ruled . . . so I got fucked on this section . . . the correct answer was 1500-1558)
Otto von Bismarck: 1862-1890 (actually, these are the correct dates for when they ruled . . . and despite the fact that he said in class that learning the dates of when these people were in office / ruled was totally ok, he marked me off for it . . . the correct answer is 1815-1898)
Yeah, and the short answer questions weren't so horrible, except for the fact that there was a question asking you to explain the entire French Revolution (including the specific phases and dates) that was worth a lot of points (i.e. 12). See, I decided to memorize the shit that was actually DIRECTLY important to Germany . . . namely the Coalition Wars after the French Revolution, and not the actual revolution itself. So I got fucked on that question. And then there was a question about Bismarck and liberals and I never really understood what his deal was with them, because I can't fucking speak German, so I screwed up that question too. So basically, it's all Bismarck's fault that I almost failed German history. Fuck you Bismarck . .. fuck you. And the French Revolution . . . stupid French people.
So considering how RIDICULOUS this test was, I am actually quite proud of myself for not failing it . .. barely. Hopefully the history department at MHC will take the ridiculousness of this test into consideration . . . the exact years when Bismarck and Karl V were born and died . . . give me a fucking break. Karl V wasn't even that fucking important. God.
At first glance, one might think that this score is ridiculously low. You might be asking me (in your head of course, because I'm in Germany and not right in front of you), "Larissa! Did you actually study?" I actually did . . . for quite a bit of time. I didn't kill myself like at MHC, but I made myself a study guide and memorized a long list of shit to the point where I felt I knew quite a lot about German history. However, when the test came, I was quite shocked. Let's look at some of these test questions, shall we?
1. For each of the following events, please give the correct year in which it took place:
The Congress of Vienna: 1813 (correct answer, 1815)
End of the First World War: 1918
Firing of Bismarck: 1890
Peace of Augsburg: 1555
Peace of Westfallen: 1648
End of the Holy Roman Empire: 1807 (correct answer, 1806)
July Revolution: 1830
Defenestration of Prague: 1618
German-Danish War: 1864
Entry of Sweden in the 30 Years War: 1630
Kapp-Luettwitz-Putsch: . . . have no idea what it is, but it happened in 1920
Beginning of the Rule of William II: 1888
2. Please give the exact date for each of the following events:
Publication of Martin Luther's 95 Theses: October 31, 1517
Beginning of WWII: August .. .1939 (correct answer: September 1, 1939)
Hitler's Takeover: May . . . 1935 (correct answer: January 30, 1933)
Storm on the Bastille: July 14, 1789
Founding of the German Empire: January 18, 1871
3. Please give the years of birth and death for the following people:
Konrad Adenauer: had no idea . .. I now know he was the first president of Western Germany and lived from 1876 to 1967
Emperor Karl V: 1512-1540 (I didn't memorize when people were born, only when they ruled . . . so I got fucked on this section . . . the correct answer was 1500-1558)
Otto von Bismarck: 1862-1890 (actually, these are the correct dates for when they ruled . . . and despite the fact that he said in class that learning the dates of when these people were in office / ruled was totally ok, he marked me off for it . . . the correct answer is 1815-1898)
Yeah, and the short answer questions weren't so horrible, except for the fact that there was a question asking you to explain the entire French Revolution (including the specific phases and dates) that was worth a lot of points (i.e. 12). See, I decided to memorize the shit that was actually DIRECTLY important to Germany . . . namely the Coalition Wars after the French Revolution, and not the actual revolution itself. So I got fucked on that question. And then there was a question about Bismarck and liberals and I never really understood what his deal was with them, because I can't fucking speak German, so I screwed up that question too. So basically, it's all Bismarck's fault that I almost failed German history. Fuck you Bismarck . .. fuck you. And the French Revolution . . . stupid French people.
So considering how RIDICULOUS this test was, I am actually quite proud of myself for not failing it . .. barely. Hopefully the history department at MHC will take the ridiculousness of this test into consideration . . . the exact years when Bismarck and Karl V were born and died . . . give me a fucking break. Karl V wasn't even that fucking important. God.