:/

[cherry_blossom4]

What do you do when you love someone more than anything, but they're steadily dragging you down, and they stop even noticing the world around them and don't even function properly as a person anymore...? I mean... I'm so tired of this and it isn't conducive to the future I want to have with him, and we both have our problems we need to work out,

Comments

[origamiwindmill]

It used to be EXACTLY like this with me and my best friend :( I was in love with him too but he was just toxic. Even worse though because I didn't even realize at the time that either of us had any problems. I was already uncertain of what I wanted to do with my life and he fed me all this crap about how it was okay to not do anything with your life, how it was just social brainwashing to even think about wanting to go to school, how everyone else in the world were just mindless robots...
After we parted ways all of it just cleared up for me and started making sense. The first sign was when I realized "Well...if I'm supposed to think for myself, and I actually WANT to go to school, how does that make me brainwashed?" And I was right. I finally took the steps to move forward and now I'm so glad I did; it's hard to leave security when you know you have it, but after a point, security comes with the price of not living. Just...existing. And it's not worth it. Moving forward is a risk but the good things that come with it make every single second worth it. I wouldn't trade it for anything. That probably isn't exactly what you wanted to hear and by NO MEANS am I saying you have to leave him to feel better...I'm just saying that moving forward is a really, really good choice. I even feel healthier because of it. And who knows, once he sees you moving forward and doing really well and actually having a good time, it could give him the push to do so as well.

[cherry_blossom4]

That's almost exactly how it is with Ian and I. And... it's just not healthy for me at all :( I've just committed myself so much to this relationship and I don't feel like he has, you know? I think my biggest problem with breaking up with him isn't that I love him too much, because even if we broke up, I could just love him as a brother instead, but that I'm too afraid of being alone. :( I don't even know anymore.

[origamiwindmill]

I really hope it doesn't come to that :( But you wouldn't be ALONE. You've got the rest of your life to find people to care about and who care about you. But all the same, it's Ian.

[cherry_blossom4]

Yeah. I know. And you're right, it is Ian we're talking about. If anything we'd just take a break for a while first and hopefully he'll start to realize that he needs to get his act together.