(no subject)
It used to petrify me, the idea that I would one day live paycheck to paycheck.
I used to think that it meant that I wasn't finacially secure, that I would live my entire life this way if I did it once.
But either I'm growing up or I'm growing lazy.
I am only working one job, and thus creating a new finacial situation for myself.
And I am not feeling frightened by this, I'm feeling freed.
I'm in college, I'm supposed to be poor, and I have too much on my plate to start worrying about finacial life after college.
It has just occured to me, I don't need to worry about buying a house after college, I need to spend my time getting through college first.
So here is to finacial freedom and finacial burden in the same entry.
=]
ps. I'm still torn, and my life is still such a mess.
I freaked out on Molly and Kristin and now I feel aweful, the entire time it was happening all I could think was that now they probabably will not want to live with my next year if this is how I really am. That is what I was thinking. They said that it was okay, but to me it isn't. But I need to focus, I need to keep my head in the game and graduate so I can become the person I want to become. I just need to keep my head in the game. But it really scares me when I freak out like that, I freaked out over a camera.
Its just like what happened with my car. I need to find a way to channel all this built up anger so that little things don't set me over the edge.
This is a big month for me, lots of things happening. And I'm very excited, I'll give you a run down:
This weekend, A visitor =]
The next weekend Chi-Town
The weekend After Haircut/color
The following weekend Presidence Ball
The very next weekend Valentines Day, which isn't actually that exciting, but..
And that is about it!
However, I am ready to give up, and I know I will feel freed by that as well.
I might have health insurance soon, and that is more than good news!
Over this weekend Molly, Kellyn, Danielle, Callie, and I all went to go see BrideWars, and that movie made me assess a lot of things in my life, and it made me very sad that I wasn't able to go to Crystal's wedding, we have been together for so many big moments in life, and that was a huge thing in her life, and I wasn't there for her.
Over and Out.
I used to think that it meant that I wasn't finacially secure, that I would live my entire life this way if I did it once.
But either I'm growing up or I'm growing lazy.
I am only working one job, and thus creating a new finacial situation for myself.
And I am not feeling frightened by this, I'm feeling freed.
I'm in college, I'm supposed to be poor, and I have too much on my plate to start worrying about finacial life after college.
It has just occured to me, I don't need to worry about buying a house after college, I need to spend my time getting through college first.
So here is to finacial freedom and finacial burden in the same entry.
=]
ps. I'm still torn, and my life is still such a mess.
I freaked out on Molly and Kristin and now I feel aweful, the entire time it was happening all I could think was that now they probabably will not want to live with my next year if this is how I really am. That is what I was thinking. They said that it was okay, but to me it isn't. But I need to focus, I need to keep my head in the game and graduate so I can become the person I want to become. I just need to keep my head in the game. But it really scares me when I freak out like that, I freaked out over a camera.
Its just like what happened with my car. I need to find a way to channel all this built up anger so that little things don't set me over the edge.
This is a big month for me, lots of things happening. And I'm very excited, I'll give you a run down:
This weekend, A visitor =]
The next weekend Chi-Town
The weekend After Haircut/color
The following weekend Presidence Ball
The very next weekend Valentines Day, which isn't actually that exciting, but..
And that is about it!
However, I am ready to give up, and I know I will feel freed by that as well.
I might have health insurance soon, and that is more than good news!
Over this weekend Molly, Kellyn, Danielle, Callie, and I all went to go see BrideWars, and that movie made me assess a lot of things in my life, and it made me very sad that I wasn't able to go to Crystal's wedding, we have been together for so many big moments in life, and that was a huge thing in her life, and I wasn't there for her.
Over and Out.