hmmm...

[chels_n_sam4eva]

i don't really have much to say but i haven't been on in a while and these past weeks have been depressing and all. school gets even more depressing everyday, not very many friends anymore i hardly talk to anyone, my grade in spanish 5/6 keeps lowering b/c i fail the tests/quizes but i do all my homework and class work, biology project/presentation is due friday the 18th so i only have like 2 1/2 weeks to get that done and that is something i really dont feel like doing b/c i fucking hate presetations, i am not like all you who don't myind getting up infront of people i hate it and it is my greatest fear next to death...anyways i need to get out of steele canyon my mom wont let me change schools or drop out of spanish even though if i fail it will lower my GPA (she doesnt believe me that it will lower it) she barley lets me drive and i was supposed to get my lisense at the end of dec. but she doesnt practice with me and i think it is b/c she is afraid to let me grow up. and another thing is that she thinks i am too young to spend the night at sams house i am 16 almost 17 and she treats me like i am 5. she is really bugging me right now. and right now every little thing will make me upset and depressed no matter what it is, i think i really need to get off these pills if that is it i have no idea but i hate this feeling. oops i lied about not having much to say... i wrote alot sorry that you had to read all my complaints... i think i complain too much and that is another thing that depresses me b/c in my head i know i am anoying but no one ever says shut up or anything like you complain too much, but in my mind i know i do...meh i dunno! later...

-I love you so much SAM and i don't know what i would do with out you, i miss you so much. I just want to be with you right now and forever, everyday and night, god i miss you! You know i am always here for you baby!