Raspberry Swirl - KH AU series - Story1Ch.2
Title: Raspberry Swirl
Author: Me! _superherogirl_ :D
Pairing: RikuSora, AkuRoku, Kaiphie? xD That sounds funny, anyways Kairi/Selphie hints of Cloud/Leon O:) And there will be lots more of Demyx fondling lovin' real soon. He is my fave after all, he needs love. :( Oh right and minor hints of Aeris/Tifa as well as Larxene/Marluxia, more in the future. Muaha!
Rating: PG-16 always to be on the safe side
Summary: The heart is indeed very complex, and these teenagers on the verge of graduating from Destiny High are going to realize how important it really is what they've been overlooking all along. And heads up this is quite the pointless christmas fic, just in time for the holidays ya? ( even if christmas is more than over forgive. :( )
POV: third, only diary entries and such will be in first person duh.
Authors Note: Three cheers for the hilarity that is adolescence! This is the first piece in a set of AU stories that will accompany this one later on. I'm so sorry it took me so long to update there was a death in the family, and I have the cold of the century. So hopefully this chap will not disappoint, I made it longer than the last as well. Check the Kairi Rules at the end of the chapter!♥
Previous Chapters: one
Dedications: First of all to my one true bunny love, Fester. I miss you so much sweetheart. And also to both the sweet reviewers from ff.net as well as on my writing journal. gunbladegirl and trekiael Your reviews seriously made me the happiest ever. :3
Disclaimer: Unfortunately the wonderful world of Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy and Disney... don't belong to me. Tis a sad, sad day. :( Oh right and the Beastie boys and Bon Jovi lyrics are certainly not mine either. ;x
It was approximately a quarter to ten, and the boys finally began to make their way to Selphie’s house. It was Kairi’s idea, since her mother was on the verge of disposing of her only child. She didn’t want to risk any of her friends ending up with the same fate. The boys all but agreed; they knew how ugly Kairi’s mother could get from lack of sleep. She was almost as bad as Kairi herself.
Sora continued walking down the island with Riku, and out of nowhere began to sing loudly. “You gotta fight, for your right, to PARTYYY!!!”
At that instant Riku covered his ears as the boy continued to sing really loud and off-key. He regretted ever letting Sora borrow his Beastie Boys’ Greatest Hits album. For whatever reason he went off in such a manner, it still made Riku laugh.
“We gotta fight for our right to party Riku!”
The older boy rolled his eyes, “Sure Sora, try telling our parents that.”
“Aww, did your mum throw away your best porno mag too?”
Riku chuckled, “Now you’re just over doing the randomness.”
“Oh you know I can’t help it,” Sora shrugged. He was so glad that the island was a rather small size, if not the perfect size. Not too big, or too small. Not that much walking distance to other friend’s houses or anything. So naturally they were already standing just a couple of feet away from Selphie’s place.
“So we’re going to meet up with Axel and Demyx at the Paopu Palace?”
“Yup! Roxas and his friends will meet up with us there too.”
“Alright cool,” Riku said as he walked up to the door. He rang the oddly shaped doorbell, and waited alongside Sora.
Sora rocked back and forth on his tip-toes, “Why do girl’s always have to take forever for everything?”
“I dunno, but I really need to pee.”
“You? What about me? You’re not the one doing the semi-pee-pee dance.”
“Semi?”
“Yeah, the full on pee-pee dance goes a little something like this.” Sora lifted his left leg up slightly and hopped around in a circle. He then proceeded to do the same thing with the other leg, but stopped soon after Selphie finally answered the door.
“Is this a new form of greeting? I must say it is rather intriguing, to say the least.”
Riku covered his mouth and snorted, while Sora turned slightly pink and shook his head.
“I was doing the pee-pee dance!”
Selphie gasped and pointed in the direction of the closest bathroom in the house, “Then go Sora! I know what it’s like to want to use the potty and can’t. I shall never deny you such privileges! Now go, go! Before it’s too late!” She finished off with a dramatic sigh and a slight bow.
“Yeah, go Sora. You wouldn’t want to have an accident or anything now would ya?” Kairi leaned against the doorframe and punched him playfully on the arm.
Sora scoffed as he rubbed the spot Kairi just punched, “Oww, you’re strong for a chick.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” She smiled sweetly.
Not being all completely there, Selphie was still under the impression Sora needed to use the restroom. She faced him and placed her hands on her hips, “Don’t you need to go?”
“Go where?” Sora asked as out of it as she was.
Riku was just about to do the full on pee-pee dance, but decided to make a fool of himself at a later time. He pushed passed Sora and the girls, “If he’s not, I am! I frankly don’t want to take a piss over at one of the coconut trees.”
“Well hey if nature calls, nature calls,” The young brunet boy shrugged and smiled coyly.
“But I don’t want nature to call you guys over to the coconut trees!”
Kairi giggled and shook her head, “Not to worry, they’ll make friendly conversation with them if you want. That way, they won’t feel completely used and abused.”
“Kairi’s right, no worries Selph! I learned my lesson to never to do it on a coconut tree ever again sometime ago.” Sora stood by the bathroom door, and waited for Riku to finish. “Could you pinch it quick already!?”
Selphie ignored that last retort, and asked Sora what he meant by him ‘learning his lesson’. “What made you change your mind about tinkling on a coconut tree ever again?”
“And why didn’t you guys take a leak before leaving?”
Sora grinned, “To answer your question, Kai, we just didn’t feel like it then. And to answer yours Selph… A coconut kinda fell on my head while I was in the process of marking my territory…”
At that instant Riku opened the door and smirked, “Kinda fell on your head?”
“You really don’t have luck with those coconuts, do you?”
A sigh escaped Sora’s lips, “You’re all just jealous because the coconuts don’t like any of you as much as they like me.”
“I think the only other living thing that comes close to liking Sora as much as the coconuts do, is probably Riku. Right Riku?” Kairi batted her eyelashes in that devious sort of way she always did. Especially when it involved two certain best guy friends of hers.
Riku, of course had to play along. He always did, so why would it be any different now? Although, maybe it would be a tad bit different that time around. Just a tad, considering what had happened earlier that morning. All which Riku was still mighty confused about, even if he had his mind set on it having been the lighting. He had to say something quick before one of them jumped to conclusions. Well, either Kairi or Selphie anyway, since Sora was usually unaware of such things. Not that Riku was complaining, he preferred a completely clueless Sora. He’s always had.
Selphie stifled a giggle best she could, “What’s wrong Riku, cat got your tongue?”
“Or would you prefer if Sora got a hold of your tongue instead?” Kairi winked because she couldn’t help herself.
Sora who was currently taking his long awaited- at least in his opinion- potty break exclaimed in retaliation. “Now just wait one darn tootin’ minute!” He flushed, washed his hands, and joined the rest of them as he placed an arm around Riku.
Kairi was about to burst into an equal amount of giggles as Selphie had, but she knew how to keep her calm. She then shook her head, “Ooh are you planning to prove us right Sora dear? By all means, go right ahead. You know Selphie and I would be more than happy to see your little show.”
Thankfully no one had noticed how quiet Riku had suddenly become. All his witty remarks, and sarcastic gestures left him. He didn’t know how to react to that last accusation. He mentally cursed at ever letting such petty jokes get to him. Such things never happened to him before; he wasn’t one to easily falter in those type of situations. He was Riku! The one and only silver-haired boy on the island with super human strength of mind and body! Alright… so that was overly pompous, even for him. He snapped out of it and looked over at Sora, then back at Kairi. All previous thoughts disappeared as a brazen look on his face emerged, “Only, if you and Selphie don’t mind putting on a small show for us as well.”
“Now that’s a plan!” Sora wriggled his eyebrows.
“…What?”
Score one for Riku and zero for Kairi! His usual cocky grin began to surface upon his face, “You heard me.”
“Alright,” Kairi smirked and knew what she had to do. She grabbed Selphie by her waist, and brought her as close to her body as she possibly could. “At the count of three we-”
“Wait a second!” Selphie squeaked with a more than obvious blush decorating her cheeks.
Both Riku and Kairi stared at her in confusion, not taking into consideration about anyone else’s feelings towards their phony act.
“What about Sora and I? What about if we don’t want to?”
Sora fidgeted in place, he really felt mighty awkward. The arm that had been around Riku suddenly began to work it’s way down. He let his arm rest by his side, “Aww you know this is all a joke Selphie. It always is. No matter how much we push each other’s buttons, we never actually do anything. You’re such a worrywart.”
Selphie couldn’t help but blush some more; she should’ve known better. It was always fun and games with those three; it was silly of her to think otherwise. “You’re right, and even if we did who cares! We’re all friends! Right Kai?” She giggled and what she did next silenced the bunch of pranksters. Selphie grabbed both sides of Kairi’s face, and planted a sloppy smooch over the girl’s lips. Why she decided to do the latter was beyond her, but in all honesty she really didn’t mind. It was only a simple kiss shared between best friends, which in the end didn’t mean anything. And it sure was not going to lead to anything, or so Selphie thought.
The boys stood there awestruck, and their jaws dangled open. Not only was what Selphie finished doing completely unexpected, it was totally hot! Hey, they were boys after all…
As soon as the kiss was initiated, it had ended. Kairi was at a loss for words, but no one could really blame her. A part of her was actually disappointed it was only a mere peck on the lips, another was utterly baffled.
“Oh dear, did I do something wrong?” Selphie frowned, no matter how much she tried not to be a stick-in-the-mud… she seemed to always displease her friends somehow. Either her actions were badly timed, or she just didn’t know any better and did something stupid. In that case it was a little of both. The three of them were just standing there, so quietly, it was bothering her!
Kairi slowly brushed a finger over her lips and smirked. She brought herself back to reality, “Well Selph, I really didn’t think you had it… in you.”
“Nice,” Sora gushed out and nudged Riku.
A couple strands of Riku’s hair conveniently fell into place over his flushed cheeks. He was losing his cool, and rather quickly at that.
Sora nudged him again, “Riku?”
Selphie tried her best to break the awkward silence, “Now it’s your turn boys!” Not doing a very good job naturally.
“I…”
“Do pardon Riku, he is still in shock that you actually kissed Kairi.”
Riku made for the door, and ignored whatever they were babbling about. His best bet was to pretend as nothing had happened. Even if he could only pull that stunt off for so long, “Come on, the guys are waiting for us at the Paopu Palace.”
“Wait Riku, come on don’t be such a spoilsport!”
“Yeah Riku, you know you want to kiss me!” Sora wrapped his arms around the other boy’s waist and showcased one of his classic grins.
There was a tinge of anticipation that had formed in the pit of Riku’s stomach, but he ignored it as he was doing for everything else. Surely it was only his stomach letting him know he had yet to have breakfast. He shoved off the overly clingy brunet, “I don’t kiss dudes, you know that. We both know that, not even joking around. Now come on, let’s go.” He made his way outside and waited for the rest of the gang to join him. Everyone else must’ve been at the Paopu Palace already…
“What a grouch honestly!” Kairi rolled her eyes, and placed an arm around her other best buddy, “And I thought I had woken up on the wrong side of the bed. Maybe he woke up on the wrong side of your bed Sora?”
Sora stared off as Riku walked out the door. He had been acting really weird ever since he climbed up to Sora’s bedroom that same morning. He hadn’t even paid much attention to the last bit that Kairi had finished saying.
“Could boys seriously get that moody? I mean whoa, he was blushing one moment and absolutely miffed the next. I don’t get it.” Selphie sighed and went to get her purse.
Kairi smirked, “I think I know exactly what’s troubling our dearest Riku.”
“That’s what you said about me the last time I was troubled. Rather last time I was sick, and you decided to make me chocobo soup.”
“Aww, that was sweet of Kairi!”
“Yeah right, until the soup kicked in and I spent the duration of a week with the runs. Till this day I don’t know what she ever put in that damn thing.”
“I just put some special herbs and spices, that’s all,” Kairi said in her defense.
“Uh huh. A little advice Kai, whenever you get married and cook for your husband… make sure to use plenty of those special herbs and spices for him.”
She immediately removed her arm away from Sora and scoffed, “Well I will! At least he’ll appreciate my cooking!”
“If it‘s fatal, at least you‘ll know he loved you enough to put up with those special herbs and spices.”
Selphie chimed in, “Kai, you can cook for me anytime. I’m surprised you haven’t done so yet. I would love to try your cooking!”
The red-head beamed, “See, at least someone would.”
“She’s just saying that because she hasn’t tried it yet,” Sora stifled a laugh.
Kairi growled, “Last time I make you anything for when you’re sick!”
“I could only thank the Gods for that!”
She was simply fuming, but before anymore of their silly banter ensued Riku poked his head inside. “For today maybe?”
The three sighed and said in unison, “Fine.” And finally they all headed out to their ever popular hang out.
-------
The Paopu Palace was a place like no other on Destiny Island, a place that could never be reciprocated by outsiders. It was owned by the Lionhearts’, with Tifa serving as their manager. She worked full time for obvious reasons, but it hardly bothered her. She was a twenty-two year old doing what she did best. No matter her age, she would always be able to spend time with the youth of their day and age. Many thought she was strange for actually enjoying the teens’ company; but what they hardly understood was that it made Tifa feel young again. Alright, so she wasn’t that old to begin with, but that’s how she felt. And that was just that. With her best friend Aeris working right next door made things all the better as well.
They were both teens once, and the job of being a teen was never an easy task. But regardless of their past mistakes, at least that time around they could offer their guidance. Tifa always wanted to be a bartender, with her current occupation being close enough. There were times where her advice had been left unheeded… Or most of the time, but it was the teen’s loss anyway. Tifa knew she gave the best advice around, next to Aeris of course.
Then naturally there was Yuffie; she was one of the many hyperactive children that seemed to always hang around the Paopu Palace. Although, it might be because she worked there part time. But even then, she loved spending her free time there.
Yuffie smiled at the customer in front of her, and began the company slogan, “Hello! Welcome to the Paopu Palace, where the paopu graces our every dish! From milkshakes, to pizza, to salads! We have it all! The Paopu is even said to cure rare diseases such as Czechoslovakia, besserwisser, and morgonpigg!”
“Yuffie,” Tifa warned.
She turned back to her boss and grinned innocently, “What?”
“Don’t insult the customer by assuming they don’t-”
The dirty blond gasped and gawked at Yuffie, “Could it really cure besserwisser?! I’ve had that for ages! I don’t really know what it is, but I know I have it. I always get these really bad stomach pains in the middle of the night after my midnight snack. I call them… Sitar snacks. I’m planning to market them someday! They’re really yummy! Oh yes and please, gimme a dozen paopu milkshakes! I would love to get rid of that besserwisser!”
Axel smacked his best friend over the head, “You idiot, that’s not a disease. It’s Swedish slang.”
“Oww!” Demyx whined and wondered how in the world he knew that. He hunched down a bit to be at eye level with the clerk, and whispered to her, “Get another dozen for him. Personally I think he has that Czechoslo-something or other one you brought up as well.”
Demyx received another smack to the head, “ Honestly, I’m right next to you and can still hear your every word. And by the way, Czechoslovakia is a country.”
“Stop that, that hurts! You’re hurting my brain cells!”
“I wasn’t aware that you had brain cells to begin with.”
“I do too have brain cells!”
Axel rolled his eyes and cancelled the absurd order of twenty four paopu milkshakes. Why was the moron standing next to him- who was currently telling the clerk the ‘secret recipe’ to his Sitar snacks- his best friend? It was a simple question Axel asked himself day in and day out. Even if he never quite got the answer he wanted when he asked himself. They were both such polar opposites; more importantly Demyx was the stupidest person he’s ever had the misfortune of meeting! Their friends at one point jumped to the ridiculous conclusion that Axel- of all people- had a thing for the klutz. Such a thing was definitely not on his agenda, he would never waste his time on the fool. He had to hand it to Demyx though, it did suck to be underestimated so badly. Although, it never seemed to bother the blond. He was always so disgustingly optimistic.
“And that’s how you make the most delicious snack ever!”
Yuffie smiled nervously and looked down at the cash register, “Um, so is there anything you boys would like?”
“Hmm, let’s see. Now what would I-”
“-Demyx could you order your forsaken ice cream pizza already!?”
“I’m sorry Axel, but I just don’t know what kind of ice cream I want on my pizza. You try making such a tough decision in forty seconds or less.”
The red head was about to burst into flames of fury. He gritted his teeth, and answered him as composed as he possibly could. “But it’s been longer than forty seconds, Demyx.”
“Hmm,” Demyx checked his shell-shaped watch and shook his head.
Yuffie mouthed an apology to the people behind the two boys that were taking forever to order.
At the moment Demyx had opened his mouth to finally tell the clerk what he wanted, he was interrupted.
“Could you possibly hurry up? I have been waiting way too long for my taste, and I want my Paopu Islander salad with ranch dressing already!”
“Marluxia, I have a migraine. Could you be the least bit considerate?”
“Well, I’m terribly sorry Larxene but it’s not my fault these individuals in front of us are taking forever. Humph…” His pink locks were pulled back, as he placed a hand on his hip.
Axel stared at the pink-headed weirdo in awe, but unfortunately his buddy was still taking his precious time to order. He began to count backwards to himself, trying his best not to strangle Demyx right then and there. If Axel was going to be the one responsible for his providential demise, he certainly wouldn’t want to do such a thing in front of all those people. Even though, desperate times did call for desperate measures. No matter the amount of witnesses.
“I got it!”
Everyone in the eatery stared back at the blond and began to clap. Demyx grinned real wide and bowed to his audience, “Thank you, thank you. Yes, I would like two paopu milkshakes and a large pizza with vanilla ice cream on top. Oooh, ooh and rainbow sprinkles and paopu chunks! Please!”
“Unbelievable,” Axel wanted to cry from frustration, but settled on slapping a hand against his forehead instead.
“Right away sir! Your grand total is twenty-five munny.”
Demyx stuck his hand into his jean pocket, but didn’t retreat anything of value. He could’ve sworn he had placed his wallet there! The boy panicked and went to check his other pocket, then moved onto the back pockets. Nothing. He didn’t have the heart, or rather guts… to ask Axel for any munny. His best friend hadn’t chopped him into tiny pieces yet because the Gods were being quite kind to him.
“Where’s your wallet?”
“Um, well I kinda- You see I- Well…”
Axel grunted and stuck his hand into his own pocket. Once he pulled out his wallet- with interesting flame designs decorating it- he checked inside. A gulp was heard when Axel realized he didn’t have enough munny to pay for the order the idiot next to him requested.
Demyx pouted, “How much do you-”
“-Eight.”
“Ah fiddlesticks, I really wanted that ice cream pizza…”
“It’s not my fault you forgot your wallet. We still have enough for the milkshakes though.”
“B-but, I had my heart set on an ice cream pizza Axel. I need my ice cream pizza.”
“Demyx, pay the chick and let’s get our milkshakes. We don’t have enough for-”
“But Axel…”
“Dem, I’m really losing my patience here.”
“Hey, are you guys done yet? My overly flamboyant friend over here wants his stinkin’ salad!”
“It’s not just any salad! It’s a Paopu Islander salad!” Marluxia whined.
Larxene growled, “I don’t care if it’s made with chocobo hindquarters, the point is you want your damn salad. And if these imbeciles don’t finish wrapping up-”
She was cut off by none other than Axel. He turned to face her and smirked, “Is that a threat? I’d like to see you try anything with us. Come on… what’s a chick going to do to two dudes?”
Marluxia almost burst into an obnoxious laugh, almost. Oh what the far from smart red head got himself into was definitely worth the wait for his salad.
“What did you say?”
“Did I stutter?”
“No really, I’d like for you to repeat what you said. Because frankly, I don’t think you value your life.”
“Larxene is it?” He poked a finger to her chest softly, “Well Larxene, personally I think you’re the one that’s being care-”
She grabbed onto his finger, and twisted it at a seventy degree angle. The squeal of pain that the red head emitted was all she needed to hear. A satisfied grin graced her features. “Well Axel, it is Axel right?”
Axel keeled over, “Yes… Dem, help… now!”
Demyx rushed over to him and tried to yoink him away from the blonde’s finger death grip.
“Ma’am, stop that at once!” Yuffie jumped over the counter- since everyone else was making a scene she decided to as well- and separated them immediately.
“Let me at her, I’ll kill her!”
“Axel, you can’t hit her-or kill her for that matter- she’s a girl!”
“All lies! She’s far from being a chick!”
“THAT’S IT! That anorexic twig is mine!” Larxene attacked.
“Who are you calling an anorexic twig you butch dyke!?” And naturally, Axel did as well.
Demyx and Yuffie had been shoved back, while Marluxia walked up to the counter nonchalantly. He smiled at the brunette attending the register this time around, “One Paopu Islander salad with ranch dressing please. Oh and also, add an extra bag of croutons I love them so.”
Tifa stared at the sight in front of her and couldn’t believe her eyes. When had her more than peaceful, cozy establishment fallen to shambles? She took the very pretty boy’s- with overly girlie features- munny and handed him his long awaited salad. “Here you go, enjoy your meal! And have a Paopu-tastic day!”
Marluxia smiled wide as he took the tray with his salad, “Not to worry, I certainly am.” He walked over to the closest booth, and continued to watch the spectacle from a rather safe view.
On the not so safe corner sat Demyx still on the floor, and about to burst out into tears. “I only wanted an ice cream pizza, was that too much to ask!?”
The short-haired employee- who was also still where she last had landed- stood up as well, and patted the whiney blond on the back. “There, there… I’m sure you’ll get your ice cream pizza… sometime…”
The door chime was heard, and four more customers walked in. They all gasped at the inevitable display in front of them. It was then the maroon hair-colored one spoke up, “What the…? Larxene? Axel? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!”
Sora blinked and leaned on Kairi slightly, “Elementary my dear Kai, me thinks feathers are flying over there.”
“Possibly more than feathers in my opinion,” Riku said as he continued to watch the fight.
Selphie looked over at both the boys, “Are you not going to try to separate them?”
“No way am I getting in between those two! That’s bloody murder!” Sora squeaked.
“I agree.”
Kairi rolled her eyes, “Typical. I really do have to wonder if we were given the wrong genders at birth.”
Riku scoffed, “No, Sora and I are just not that stupid.”
“And playing it safe, don’t forget playing it safe!”
“Same difference.”
“You two are impossible! And so are they!” Kairi rushed over to the pile of limbs attacking each other. She tried her best to separate them, but her attempts all failed. “A little help please?!”
“I’m coming Kairi!”
Demyx’s ears perked up when he heard that name, but it couldn’t be… Well, actually yes it could. The probability of seeing someone you once went out with, on a small island was- why he was suddenly reminded of that television show Gilligan’s Island was beyond his capacity- on the more than likely to happen list. He blushed and made his way over to help her as well.
Finally with the help of most of the customers in the restaurant, they were able to detach the short-tempered and violent pair. Axel seemed to have been the most bruised up, but that’s because he kept missing horribly. That alone was quite embarrassing for him. Although, Larxene had a couple of battle scars as well. But hardly.
Once everything was in almost complete order Demyx walked up to Kairi and smiled. “Hey! How are you doing?”
She brushed off her pink skirt, and scowled not taking notice at the blond guy in front of her, “Stupid…”
Demyx wasn’t sure if she was ignoring him or not, but he attempted to greet her once more. “Um, hey?”
“Don’t they know of Rule #76? Ugh, they’re so going to pay for that later…”
Yuffie made her way over to Sora and Riku, as she tackled them both to the ground. “Thanks guys! We really don’t know what we would’ve done without your help!”
“Ow, Yuffie watch it!” Sora laughed and fell back onto the floor. The floor seemed to be the popular spot at the Paopu Palace for the day.
Riku shook his head as he steadied himself up. He hadn’t exactly fallen as his buddy did, unlike Sora he was more careful around girls like Yuffie.
“Are you alright Larxene?”
Larxene grimaced and shook her head, “What does it look like Selphie?”
“Well at least you’re looking better than your opponent!” The brunette grinned wide.
“Speaking of…”
Axel had gone to sit down at an empty booth. There were quite a couple since everyone was either standing, or on the floor, or behind the cash register… He couldn’t believe what had just happened. He almost got his ass kicked by a chick. If they hadn’t been pulled apart, he probably would’ve had gotten his assed kicked by a chick! Where was his best buddy after everything that had happened? He was partially, if not mostly to blame for it all.
“Kairi!”
A pair of violet colored eyes turned to look and stare back at a pair of overly concerned green ones. “Are you alright?”
Kairi smiled sweetly, “Duh of course I am. Nothing to it.”
Selphie smiled back, “I’m glad, now come on. Weren’t we all gonna go for ice cream and pizza?”
“True, let’s get to it then. Doesn’t look like there’s going to be a line anytime soon,” she winked.
Both girls made their way to the front of the non-existent line, while Demyx looked more than extremely crestfallen. He had been completely ignored, and twice at that! Was she still holding a grudge? Considering she was the one that broke up with him, he found that highly unlikely. The blond sighed and frowned when he made his way up to the booth Axel was sitting in. He sat down and placed the palms of his hands under his chin.
His best friend stared back at him in a cynical manner, “Oh no Dem, I wasn’t just almost pwned by a girl. Nope. I’m perfectly fine, thanks for asking buddy.”
Demyx sighed again and let his arms droop down onto the table, having his face slam onto it in the process as well.
Axel arched a brow, “What the hell is the matter with you?” He turned to look around, and made a face when he spotted a girl with a much darker shade of red hair than his.
“Sorry…”
It was weird to see Demyx not smiling, it was blasphemous all on it’s own. Things weren’t supposed to be like that, far from it. They had an arrangement; one was to always be cynical and rude, while the other was stupid, happy-go-lucky, and not so rude… That was what they had settled on, but suddenly the blond wasn’t following up to such arrangement. “You’ve always had a thing for red-heads haven’t ya?” At the sound of his own words, Axel couldn’t help but turn a bit pink. He hadn’t meant it to come off as an insinuation of anything. He doubted Demyx caught on it anyway.
“I’ve only had two girlfriends in my short pathetic life, and they’ve both dumped me,” Demyx sulked.
“Well…”
“I’m hopeless Axel, girls just don’t like me!”
“You can’t blame Ariel for dumping you for that Eric dude though.”
Demyx’s eyes watered, “You’re not helping!”
“Eh, sorry. I’ve never been good at the consoling bit.”
“Couldn’t tell.”
“Now buddy, haven’t you ever wondered why these girls dumped you?”
“Not really.”
“Well, you should. Then maybe you could understand why it happened, and prevent it from happening again with someone else in the future. Ariel, she was quite a gal but you can’t really compete with a prince.” Axel leaned back, and did finger quotes after he said ‘prince’.
“But then, what about Kairi? We were perfectly fine. Then she caught me off guard a week before Halloween, after I told her I was going to dress up as a merman.”
Axel blinked, “I would’ve dumped you too if that were the case.”
“No, no she thought it was a cute idea but… I dunno.”
“Hmm, that’s odd.”
“What is Axel?”
The red-head continued to stare at Demyx’s ex-girlfriend as her arm moved down from Selphie’s shoulders to her waist. All in a matter of three seconds, what a record that was. He scratched his chin pensively, as the light bulb from the part of the ceiling they were sitting under flickered on and off.
Demyx stared at him completely confused, and still craved for that ice cream pizza. “Axel? Did you pop a fuse of some sort?”
“Don’t you see Dem?” He leaned across the table and whispered into Demyx’s ear.
The blond’s eyes bugged out, “No! She… wait what?”
Axel rolled his eyes, and inconspicuously pointed over in Kairi’s direction. “She’s a lesbo.”
“A what?”
“A lesbian.”
“Excuse you?”
“Demyx, she likes girls.”
“What’s wrong with liking girls? I don’t see anything wrong with-” It finally hit him, but it naturally took him awhile. His brain was only capable of taking in so much.
“If you don’t believe me just look at her.”
“But…”
Before anymore speculation took place, a loud voice boomed across the diner. The voice belonged to none other than Tifa Lockheart. She had made her way on top of the counter, and somehow had a microphone in hand. “Ladies and gents! Guys and gals! Paying customers and non-paying customers!”
Kairi snorted, “I think we all get the point Tifa.”
Tifa cleared her throat and continued, “Next time one of you decide to pick a fight with someone, please… TAKE IT OUTSIDE! The Paopu Palace does not appreciate being a fighting rink, so please don’t make it one! Or you’ll have to answer to me, is that clear?!”
“And me too!” Yuffie exclaimed.
Everyone nodded and agreed. But Axel slumped down on his seat, and was even more embarrassed than before.
Riku stared at Tifa’s long slender legs from the top of the counter, and then was smacked over the head by Kairi.
“You perv.”
“Shut up Kairi, you’re just as bad.”
“Oh really?”
Sora sighed and made his way to the little boy’s room while his friends continued to quarrel. He needed to tinkle again. It wasn’t his fault he had a weak bladder!
Kairi stared off as Sora walked away from them, “Damn him. He always needs to pee! Riku, why don’t you go get him so we can finally order.”
“Why me? Why not you or Selphie?”
“Maybe you haven’t noticed Riku, but we’re kinda girls.”
“I didn’t think that alone would stop you.”
She pushed him towards the direction of the boy’s restroom playfully, “Go you big goon!”
“Fine, fine I’ll go!”
“Good. Now, Selph… huh? Where did you go?” Kairi looked around frantically, but didn’t see any signs of Selphie.
The background music in the diner had been quite dull for the passed couple of hours, and Yuffie told herself she needed to fix that immediately. She walked over to the back room where all the important controls were, and fiddled around with them. Thankfully her co-workers taught her well, bless that Leon and Cloud. She blushed as inappropriate images popped into her head. She couldn’t help herself! Although the song that began to play next on their local rock station made her smile wide. Yuffie simply loved Bon Jovi!
“YOUR LOVE IS LIKE BAD MEDICINE! BAD MEDICINE IS WHAT I NEED OH OH OH!”
Axel looked around and felt a bit better at the change of music, “Finally, something good.”
Demyx’s mood brightened up as well as he sang along, “There ain’t no doctor that can cure my disease!”
The door chimes were heard once more. There were four more teenagers making their way inside the Paopu Palace. The only girl in the group spotted a familiar face and she smiled.
“Olette!”
“Selphie!”
They walked up to each other and hugged, as the two blond boys rolled their eyes while the chubby brunet smiled at the girls. Kairi joined them and greeted them as well. Even though she found it rather amusing that Olette spotted her cousin straight away, while she on the other hand had been looking for her but alas no luck.
“Axel?”
The red-head blinked at the sight of the kids that just walked in. He felt his heart suddenly drop down into his stomach. Forget the butterflies in the stomach, or hearts fluttering. No, Axel’s heart jumped off a cliff and committed body organ suicide. It just so happened that the results of the jump ended up being somewhere near the stomach.
Demyx snapped his fingers in front of his friend’s face, “Axel? Snap out of it! Axel!”
“Axel?” One of the blond boys asked.
Kairi nodded, “Yeah he’s here too. You wanna say hi to him?”
“Axel!” Demyx shook him violently but still no sign of intelligent life as once before. Maybe his brain had catapulted downwards as well. Or maybe Larxene did beat him senseless, along with everything else.
“Roxas…”
“Oi, get a grip will ya?” Demyx slapped him across his right cheek and huffed in an annoyed manner. And it was not an easy feat to get Demyx annoyed.
Roxas shrugged and shook his head, “Nah he looks busy. Besides I only came here for the pizza and ice cream my cousin promised me.”
The rest of the little group said in unison, “Us too!”
“Oh boy, wait until Sora hears this…” Kairi whispered to Selphie.
“Is he still tinkling? Didn’t you send Riku after him?”
Kairi smirked and nodded, “Yes, but if all goes as planned… I doubt they’d be back any time soon. We should start ordering.”
“But what about Sora, isn’t he paying?”
“Nah, it’s on me today.”
Roxas grinned and placed an arm around her, “Awesome, thanks Kairi.”
“Nah don’t mention it.” Once the rest of them were away from earshot, she whispered some more nonsense to herself. “Besides, it’s only fair. The tab is on me today, while something- or should I say someone will be on Sora. Hehe, I’m so evil.”
“Kairi?”
The naughty plotting fag hag jumped and squeaked, something she hadn’t done in ages. “Selphie! Don’t do that!”
She giggled and apologized, “Sorry but they were just waiting for you to pay their order.”
“Oh right… Sheesh they ordered already?”
“Yeah, apparently they’re not like us that take forever to do so.”
“Meh… they must really want their flippin’ pizza and ice cream.”
--------
“Sora? Are you done yet? You take an awful long time to piss.”
“Riku? I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Huh? What is it?”
“I… need… you.”
Riku froze on the spot, and the oddly appropriate song continued to go on…
That’s what you get for falling in love,
then you bleed,
You get a little and it’s never enough,
On your knees,
That’s what you get for falling in love,
Now this boys addicted because your kiss is the drug!
The silver-haired boy growled, “I hate coincidental circumstances…”
-----
A/N; So what did you guys think of this chapter? I'm so sorry it took me this long to update. I'm really having the time of my life writing this AU series. I can honestly say I haven't felt this excited to write a fic in...ever.
Now, as for my own witty/silly/retarded creations... I do plan on sketching up the Paopu Palace so all of you can see what it looks like. ;) And maybe I'll play around with the menu some more on the next chapter. Shame that Christmas kinda already passed and this is still supposed to be a Christmas fic. *sigh* Either way, the show must go on! As for the Kairi rules unforunately there was only one this time around, and it wasn't even typed up. But I'm not cheating you out of it! I promise more in the future, but without further ado...
Kairi Rule #76;
A Kairi is known for her snazzy pink attire, which suits her more than perfectly fine. But it is also a known fact that when a Kairi gets any of her snazzy pink attire dirty, stained, or tainted in any way, shape or form the guilty party is far from being a safe party. Your safest bet is to either A: Offer to take it to the cleaners later on. Or. B: As our loveable Demyx would say... Run, run away!
Thank you and goodnight everyone! Happy belated Christmas! And a very Happy New Year's to come! :D
Author: Me! _superherogirl_ :D
Pairing: RikuSora, AkuRoku, Kaiphie? xD That sounds funny, anyways Kairi/Selphie hints of Cloud/Leon O:) And there will be lots more of Demyx fondling lovin' real soon. He is my fave after all, he needs love. :( Oh right and minor hints of Aeris/Tifa as well as Larxene/Marluxia, more in the future. Muaha!
Rating: PG-16 always to be on the safe side
Summary: The heart is indeed very complex, and these teenagers on the verge of graduating from Destiny High are going to realize how important it really is what they've been overlooking all along. And heads up this is quite the pointless christmas fic, just in time for the holidays ya? ( even if christmas is more than over forgive. :( )
POV: third, only diary entries and such will be in first person duh.
Authors Note: Three cheers for the hilarity that is adolescence! This is the first piece in a set of AU stories that will accompany this one later on. I'm so sorry it took me so long to update there was a death in the family, and I have the cold of the century. So hopefully this chap will not disappoint, I made it longer than the last as well. Check the Kairi Rules at the end of the chapter!♥
Previous Chapters: one
Dedications: First of all to my one true bunny love, Fester. I miss you so much sweetheart. And also to both the sweet reviewers from ff.net as well as on my writing journal. gunbladegirl and trekiael Your reviews seriously made me the happiest ever. :3
Disclaimer: Unfortunately the wonderful world of Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy and Disney... don't belong to me. Tis a sad, sad day. :( Oh right and the Beastie boys and Bon Jovi lyrics are certainly not mine either. ;x
It was approximately a quarter to ten, and the boys finally began to make their way to Selphie’s house. It was Kairi’s idea, since her mother was on the verge of disposing of her only child. She didn’t want to risk any of her friends ending up with the same fate. The boys all but agreed; they knew how ugly Kairi’s mother could get from lack of sleep. She was almost as bad as Kairi herself.
Sora continued walking down the island with Riku, and out of nowhere began to sing loudly. “You gotta fight, for your right, to PARTYYY!!!”
At that instant Riku covered his ears as the boy continued to sing really loud and off-key. He regretted ever letting Sora borrow his Beastie Boys’ Greatest Hits album. For whatever reason he went off in such a manner, it still made Riku laugh.
“We gotta fight for our right to party Riku!”
The older boy rolled his eyes, “Sure Sora, try telling our parents that.”
“Aww, did your mum throw away your best porno mag too?”
Riku chuckled, “Now you’re just over doing the randomness.”
“Oh you know I can’t help it,” Sora shrugged. He was so glad that the island was a rather small size, if not the perfect size. Not too big, or too small. Not that much walking distance to other friend’s houses or anything. So naturally they were already standing just a couple of feet away from Selphie’s place.
“So we’re going to meet up with Axel and Demyx at the Paopu Palace?”
“Yup! Roxas and his friends will meet up with us there too.”
“Alright cool,” Riku said as he walked up to the door. He rang the oddly shaped doorbell, and waited alongside Sora.
Sora rocked back and forth on his tip-toes, “Why do girl’s always have to take forever for everything?”
“I dunno, but I really need to pee.”
“You? What about me? You’re not the one doing the semi-pee-pee dance.”
“Semi?”
“Yeah, the full on pee-pee dance goes a little something like this.” Sora lifted his left leg up slightly and hopped around in a circle. He then proceeded to do the same thing with the other leg, but stopped soon after Selphie finally answered the door.
“Is this a new form of greeting? I must say it is rather intriguing, to say the least.”
Riku covered his mouth and snorted, while Sora turned slightly pink and shook his head.
“I was doing the pee-pee dance!”
Selphie gasped and pointed in the direction of the closest bathroom in the house, “Then go Sora! I know what it’s like to want to use the potty and can’t. I shall never deny you such privileges! Now go, go! Before it’s too late!” She finished off with a dramatic sigh and a slight bow.
“Yeah, go Sora. You wouldn’t want to have an accident or anything now would ya?” Kairi leaned against the doorframe and punched him playfully on the arm.
Sora scoffed as he rubbed the spot Kairi just punched, “Oww, you’re strong for a chick.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” She smiled sweetly.
Not being all completely there, Selphie was still under the impression Sora needed to use the restroom. She faced him and placed her hands on her hips, “Don’t you need to go?”
“Go where?” Sora asked as out of it as she was.
Riku was just about to do the full on pee-pee dance, but decided to make a fool of himself at a later time. He pushed passed Sora and the girls, “If he’s not, I am! I frankly don’t want to take a piss over at one of the coconut trees.”
“Well hey if nature calls, nature calls,” The young brunet boy shrugged and smiled coyly.
“But I don’t want nature to call you guys over to the coconut trees!”
Kairi giggled and shook her head, “Not to worry, they’ll make friendly conversation with them if you want. That way, they won’t feel completely used and abused.”
“Kairi’s right, no worries Selph! I learned my lesson to never to do it on a coconut tree ever again sometime ago.” Sora stood by the bathroom door, and waited for Riku to finish. “Could you pinch it quick already!?”
Selphie ignored that last retort, and asked Sora what he meant by him ‘learning his lesson’. “What made you change your mind about tinkling on a coconut tree ever again?”
“And why didn’t you guys take a leak before leaving?”
Sora grinned, “To answer your question, Kai, we just didn’t feel like it then. And to answer yours Selph… A coconut kinda fell on my head while I was in the process of marking my territory…”
At that instant Riku opened the door and smirked, “Kinda fell on your head?”
“You really don’t have luck with those coconuts, do you?”
A sigh escaped Sora’s lips, “You’re all just jealous because the coconuts don’t like any of you as much as they like me.”
“I think the only other living thing that comes close to liking Sora as much as the coconuts do, is probably Riku. Right Riku?” Kairi batted her eyelashes in that devious sort of way she always did. Especially when it involved two certain best guy friends of hers.
Riku, of course had to play along. He always did, so why would it be any different now? Although, maybe it would be a tad bit different that time around. Just a tad, considering what had happened earlier that morning. All which Riku was still mighty confused about, even if he had his mind set on it having been the lighting. He had to say something quick before one of them jumped to conclusions. Well, either Kairi or Selphie anyway, since Sora was usually unaware of such things. Not that Riku was complaining, he preferred a completely clueless Sora. He’s always had.
Selphie stifled a giggle best she could, “What’s wrong Riku, cat got your tongue?”
“Or would you prefer if Sora got a hold of your tongue instead?” Kairi winked because she couldn’t help herself.
Sora who was currently taking his long awaited- at least in his opinion- potty break exclaimed in retaliation. “Now just wait one darn tootin’ minute!” He flushed, washed his hands, and joined the rest of them as he placed an arm around Riku.
Kairi was about to burst into an equal amount of giggles as Selphie had, but she knew how to keep her calm. She then shook her head, “Ooh are you planning to prove us right Sora dear? By all means, go right ahead. You know Selphie and I would be more than happy to see your little show.”
Thankfully no one had noticed how quiet Riku had suddenly become. All his witty remarks, and sarcastic gestures left him. He didn’t know how to react to that last accusation. He mentally cursed at ever letting such petty jokes get to him. Such things never happened to him before; he wasn’t one to easily falter in those type of situations. He was Riku! The one and only silver-haired boy on the island with super human strength of mind and body! Alright… so that was overly pompous, even for him. He snapped out of it and looked over at Sora, then back at Kairi. All previous thoughts disappeared as a brazen look on his face emerged, “Only, if you and Selphie don’t mind putting on a small show for us as well.”
“Now that’s a plan!” Sora wriggled his eyebrows.
“…What?”
Score one for Riku and zero for Kairi! His usual cocky grin began to surface upon his face, “You heard me.”
“Alright,” Kairi smirked and knew what she had to do. She grabbed Selphie by her waist, and brought her as close to her body as she possibly could. “At the count of three we-”
“Wait a second!” Selphie squeaked with a more than obvious blush decorating her cheeks.
Both Riku and Kairi stared at her in confusion, not taking into consideration about anyone else’s feelings towards their phony act.
“What about Sora and I? What about if we don’t want to?”
Sora fidgeted in place, he really felt mighty awkward. The arm that had been around Riku suddenly began to work it’s way down. He let his arm rest by his side, “Aww you know this is all a joke Selphie. It always is. No matter how much we push each other’s buttons, we never actually do anything. You’re such a worrywart.”
Selphie couldn’t help but blush some more; she should’ve known better. It was always fun and games with those three; it was silly of her to think otherwise. “You’re right, and even if we did who cares! We’re all friends! Right Kai?” She giggled and what she did next silenced the bunch of pranksters. Selphie grabbed both sides of Kairi’s face, and planted a sloppy smooch over the girl’s lips. Why she decided to do the latter was beyond her, but in all honesty she really didn’t mind. It was only a simple kiss shared between best friends, which in the end didn’t mean anything. And it sure was not going to lead to anything, or so Selphie thought.
The boys stood there awestruck, and their jaws dangled open. Not only was what Selphie finished doing completely unexpected, it was totally hot! Hey, they were boys after all…
As soon as the kiss was initiated, it had ended. Kairi was at a loss for words, but no one could really blame her. A part of her was actually disappointed it was only a mere peck on the lips, another was utterly baffled.
“Oh dear, did I do something wrong?” Selphie frowned, no matter how much she tried not to be a stick-in-the-mud… she seemed to always displease her friends somehow. Either her actions were badly timed, or she just didn’t know any better and did something stupid. In that case it was a little of both. The three of them were just standing there, so quietly, it was bothering her!
Kairi slowly brushed a finger over her lips and smirked. She brought herself back to reality, “Well Selph, I really didn’t think you had it… in you.”
“Nice,” Sora gushed out and nudged Riku.
A couple strands of Riku’s hair conveniently fell into place over his flushed cheeks. He was losing his cool, and rather quickly at that.
Sora nudged him again, “Riku?”
Selphie tried her best to break the awkward silence, “Now it’s your turn boys!” Not doing a very good job naturally.
“I…”
“Do pardon Riku, he is still in shock that you actually kissed Kairi.”
Riku made for the door, and ignored whatever they were babbling about. His best bet was to pretend as nothing had happened. Even if he could only pull that stunt off for so long, “Come on, the guys are waiting for us at the Paopu Palace.”
“Wait Riku, come on don’t be such a spoilsport!”
“Yeah Riku, you know you want to kiss me!” Sora wrapped his arms around the other boy’s waist and showcased one of his classic grins.
There was a tinge of anticipation that had formed in the pit of Riku’s stomach, but he ignored it as he was doing for everything else. Surely it was only his stomach letting him know he had yet to have breakfast. He shoved off the overly clingy brunet, “I don’t kiss dudes, you know that. We both know that, not even joking around. Now come on, let’s go.” He made his way outside and waited for the rest of the gang to join him. Everyone else must’ve been at the Paopu Palace already…
“What a grouch honestly!” Kairi rolled her eyes, and placed an arm around her other best buddy, “And I thought I had woken up on the wrong side of the bed. Maybe he woke up on the wrong side of your bed Sora?”
Sora stared off as Riku walked out the door. He had been acting really weird ever since he climbed up to Sora’s bedroom that same morning. He hadn’t even paid much attention to the last bit that Kairi had finished saying.
“Could boys seriously get that moody? I mean whoa, he was blushing one moment and absolutely miffed the next. I don’t get it.” Selphie sighed and went to get her purse.
Kairi smirked, “I think I know exactly what’s troubling our dearest Riku.”
“That’s what you said about me the last time I was troubled. Rather last time I was sick, and you decided to make me chocobo soup.”
“Aww, that was sweet of Kairi!”
“Yeah right, until the soup kicked in and I spent the duration of a week with the runs. Till this day I don’t know what she ever put in that damn thing.”
“I just put some special herbs and spices, that’s all,” Kairi said in her defense.
“Uh huh. A little advice Kai, whenever you get married and cook for your husband… make sure to use plenty of those special herbs and spices for him.”
She immediately removed her arm away from Sora and scoffed, “Well I will! At least he’ll appreciate my cooking!”
“If it‘s fatal, at least you‘ll know he loved you enough to put up with those special herbs and spices.”
Selphie chimed in, “Kai, you can cook for me anytime. I’m surprised you haven’t done so yet. I would love to try your cooking!”
The red-head beamed, “See, at least someone would.”
“She’s just saying that because she hasn’t tried it yet,” Sora stifled a laugh.
Kairi growled, “Last time I make you anything for when you’re sick!”
“I could only thank the Gods for that!”
She was simply fuming, but before anymore of their silly banter ensued Riku poked his head inside. “For today maybe?”
The three sighed and said in unison, “Fine.” And finally they all headed out to their ever popular hang out.
-------
The Paopu Palace was a place like no other on Destiny Island, a place that could never be reciprocated by outsiders. It was owned by the Lionhearts’, with Tifa serving as their manager. She worked full time for obvious reasons, but it hardly bothered her. She was a twenty-two year old doing what she did best. No matter her age, she would always be able to spend time with the youth of their day and age. Many thought she was strange for actually enjoying the teens’ company; but what they hardly understood was that it made Tifa feel young again. Alright, so she wasn’t that old to begin with, but that’s how she felt. And that was just that. With her best friend Aeris working right next door made things all the better as well.
They were both teens once, and the job of being a teen was never an easy task. But regardless of their past mistakes, at least that time around they could offer their guidance. Tifa always wanted to be a bartender, with her current occupation being close enough. There were times where her advice had been left unheeded… Or most of the time, but it was the teen’s loss anyway. Tifa knew she gave the best advice around, next to Aeris of course.
Then naturally there was Yuffie; she was one of the many hyperactive children that seemed to always hang around the Paopu Palace. Although, it might be because she worked there part time. But even then, she loved spending her free time there.
Yuffie smiled at the customer in front of her, and began the company slogan, “Hello! Welcome to the Paopu Palace, where the paopu graces our every dish! From milkshakes, to pizza, to salads! We have it all! The Paopu is even said to cure rare diseases such as Czechoslovakia, besserwisser, and morgonpigg!”
“Yuffie,” Tifa warned.
She turned back to her boss and grinned innocently, “What?”
“Don’t insult the customer by assuming they don’t-”
The dirty blond gasped and gawked at Yuffie, “Could it really cure besserwisser?! I’ve had that for ages! I don’t really know what it is, but I know I have it. I always get these really bad stomach pains in the middle of the night after my midnight snack. I call them… Sitar snacks. I’m planning to market them someday! They’re really yummy! Oh yes and please, gimme a dozen paopu milkshakes! I would love to get rid of that besserwisser!”
Axel smacked his best friend over the head, “You idiot, that’s not a disease. It’s Swedish slang.”
“Oww!” Demyx whined and wondered how in the world he knew that. He hunched down a bit to be at eye level with the clerk, and whispered to her, “Get another dozen for him. Personally I think he has that Czechoslo-something or other one you brought up as well.”
Demyx received another smack to the head, “ Honestly, I’m right next to you and can still hear your every word. And by the way, Czechoslovakia is a country.”
“Stop that, that hurts! You’re hurting my brain cells!”
“I wasn’t aware that you had brain cells to begin with.”
“I do too have brain cells!”
Axel rolled his eyes and cancelled the absurd order of twenty four paopu milkshakes. Why was the moron standing next to him- who was currently telling the clerk the ‘secret recipe’ to his Sitar snacks- his best friend? It was a simple question Axel asked himself day in and day out. Even if he never quite got the answer he wanted when he asked himself. They were both such polar opposites; more importantly Demyx was the stupidest person he’s ever had the misfortune of meeting! Their friends at one point jumped to the ridiculous conclusion that Axel- of all people- had a thing for the klutz. Such a thing was definitely not on his agenda, he would never waste his time on the fool. He had to hand it to Demyx though, it did suck to be underestimated so badly. Although, it never seemed to bother the blond. He was always so disgustingly optimistic.
“And that’s how you make the most delicious snack ever!”
Yuffie smiled nervously and looked down at the cash register, “Um, so is there anything you boys would like?”
“Hmm, let’s see. Now what would I-”
“-Demyx could you order your forsaken ice cream pizza already!?”
“I’m sorry Axel, but I just don’t know what kind of ice cream I want on my pizza. You try making such a tough decision in forty seconds or less.”
The red head was about to burst into flames of fury. He gritted his teeth, and answered him as composed as he possibly could. “But it’s been longer than forty seconds, Demyx.”
“Hmm,” Demyx checked his shell-shaped watch and shook his head.
Yuffie mouthed an apology to the people behind the two boys that were taking forever to order.
At the moment Demyx had opened his mouth to finally tell the clerk what he wanted, he was interrupted.
“Could you possibly hurry up? I have been waiting way too long for my taste, and I want my Paopu Islander salad with ranch dressing already!”
“Marluxia, I have a migraine. Could you be the least bit considerate?”
“Well, I’m terribly sorry Larxene but it’s not my fault these individuals in front of us are taking forever. Humph…” His pink locks were pulled back, as he placed a hand on his hip.
Axel stared at the pink-headed weirdo in awe, but unfortunately his buddy was still taking his precious time to order. He began to count backwards to himself, trying his best not to strangle Demyx right then and there. If Axel was going to be the one responsible for his providential demise, he certainly wouldn’t want to do such a thing in front of all those people. Even though, desperate times did call for desperate measures. No matter the amount of witnesses.
“I got it!”
Everyone in the eatery stared back at the blond and began to clap. Demyx grinned real wide and bowed to his audience, “Thank you, thank you. Yes, I would like two paopu milkshakes and a large pizza with vanilla ice cream on top. Oooh, ooh and rainbow sprinkles and paopu chunks! Please!”
“Unbelievable,” Axel wanted to cry from frustration, but settled on slapping a hand against his forehead instead.
“Right away sir! Your grand total is twenty-five munny.”
Demyx stuck his hand into his jean pocket, but didn’t retreat anything of value. He could’ve sworn he had placed his wallet there! The boy panicked and went to check his other pocket, then moved onto the back pockets. Nothing. He didn’t have the heart, or rather guts… to ask Axel for any munny. His best friend hadn’t chopped him into tiny pieces yet because the Gods were being quite kind to him.
“Where’s your wallet?”
“Um, well I kinda- You see I- Well…”
Axel grunted and stuck his hand into his own pocket. Once he pulled out his wallet- with interesting flame designs decorating it- he checked inside. A gulp was heard when Axel realized he didn’t have enough munny to pay for the order the idiot next to him requested.
Demyx pouted, “How much do you-”
“-Eight.”
“Ah fiddlesticks, I really wanted that ice cream pizza…”
“It’s not my fault you forgot your wallet. We still have enough for the milkshakes though.”
“B-but, I had my heart set on an ice cream pizza Axel. I need my ice cream pizza.”
“Demyx, pay the chick and let’s get our milkshakes. We don’t have enough for-”
“But Axel…”
“Dem, I’m really losing my patience here.”
“Hey, are you guys done yet? My overly flamboyant friend over here wants his stinkin’ salad!”
“It’s not just any salad! It’s a Paopu Islander salad!” Marluxia whined.
Larxene growled, “I don’t care if it’s made with chocobo hindquarters, the point is you want your damn salad. And if these imbeciles don’t finish wrapping up-”
She was cut off by none other than Axel. He turned to face her and smirked, “Is that a threat? I’d like to see you try anything with us. Come on… what’s a chick going to do to two dudes?”
Marluxia almost burst into an obnoxious laugh, almost. Oh what the far from smart red head got himself into was definitely worth the wait for his salad.
“What did you say?”
“Did I stutter?”
“No really, I’d like for you to repeat what you said. Because frankly, I don’t think you value your life.”
“Larxene is it?” He poked a finger to her chest softly, “Well Larxene, personally I think you’re the one that’s being care-”
She grabbed onto his finger, and twisted it at a seventy degree angle. The squeal of pain that the red head emitted was all she needed to hear. A satisfied grin graced her features. “Well Axel, it is Axel right?”
Axel keeled over, “Yes… Dem, help… now!”
Demyx rushed over to him and tried to yoink him away from the blonde’s finger death grip.
“Ma’am, stop that at once!” Yuffie jumped over the counter- since everyone else was making a scene she decided to as well- and separated them immediately.
“Let me at her, I’ll kill her!”
“Axel, you can’t hit her-or kill her for that matter- she’s a girl!”
“All lies! She’s far from being a chick!”
“THAT’S IT! That anorexic twig is mine!” Larxene attacked.
“Who are you calling an anorexic twig you butch dyke!?” And naturally, Axel did as well.
Demyx and Yuffie had been shoved back, while Marluxia walked up to the counter nonchalantly. He smiled at the brunette attending the register this time around, “One Paopu Islander salad with ranch dressing please. Oh and also, add an extra bag of croutons I love them so.”
Tifa stared at the sight in front of her and couldn’t believe her eyes. When had her more than peaceful, cozy establishment fallen to shambles? She took the very pretty boy’s- with overly girlie features- munny and handed him his long awaited salad. “Here you go, enjoy your meal! And have a Paopu-tastic day!”
Marluxia smiled wide as he took the tray with his salad, “Not to worry, I certainly am.” He walked over to the closest booth, and continued to watch the spectacle from a rather safe view.
On the not so safe corner sat Demyx still on the floor, and about to burst out into tears. “I only wanted an ice cream pizza, was that too much to ask!?”
The short-haired employee- who was also still where she last had landed- stood up as well, and patted the whiney blond on the back. “There, there… I’m sure you’ll get your ice cream pizza… sometime…”
The door chime was heard, and four more customers walked in. They all gasped at the inevitable display in front of them. It was then the maroon hair-colored one spoke up, “What the…? Larxene? Axel? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!”
Sora blinked and leaned on Kairi slightly, “Elementary my dear Kai, me thinks feathers are flying over there.”
“Possibly more than feathers in my opinion,” Riku said as he continued to watch the fight.
Selphie looked over at both the boys, “Are you not going to try to separate them?”
“No way am I getting in between those two! That’s bloody murder!” Sora squeaked.
“I agree.”
Kairi rolled her eyes, “Typical. I really do have to wonder if we were given the wrong genders at birth.”
Riku scoffed, “No, Sora and I are just not that stupid.”
“And playing it safe, don’t forget playing it safe!”
“Same difference.”
“You two are impossible! And so are they!” Kairi rushed over to the pile of limbs attacking each other. She tried her best to separate them, but her attempts all failed. “A little help please?!”
“I’m coming Kairi!”
Demyx’s ears perked up when he heard that name, but it couldn’t be… Well, actually yes it could. The probability of seeing someone you once went out with, on a small island was- why he was suddenly reminded of that television show Gilligan’s Island was beyond his capacity- on the more than likely to happen list. He blushed and made his way over to help her as well.
Finally with the help of most of the customers in the restaurant, they were able to detach the short-tempered and violent pair. Axel seemed to have been the most bruised up, but that’s because he kept missing horribly. That alone was quite embarrassing for him. Although, Larxene had a couple of battle scars as well. But hardly.
Once everything was in almost complete order Demyx walked up to Kairi and smiled. “Hey! How are you doing?”
She brushed off her pink skirt, and scowled not taking notice at the blond guy in front of her, “Stupid…”
Demyx wasn’t sure if she was ignoring him or not, but he attempted to greet her once more. “Um, hey?”
“Don’t they know of Rule #76? Ugh, they’re so going to pay for that later…”
Yuffie made her way over to Sora and Riku, as she tackled them both to the ground. “Thanks guys! We really don’t know what we would’ve done without your help!”
“Ow, Yuffie watch it!” Sora laughed and fell back onto the floor. The floor seemed to be the popular spot at the Paopu Palace for the day.
Riku shook his head as he steadied himself up. He hadn’t exactly fallen as his buddy did, unlike Sora he was more careful around girls like Yuffie.
“Are you alright Larxene?”
Larxene grimaced and shook her head, “What does it look like Selphie?”
“Well at least you’re looking better than your opponent!” The brunette grinned wide.
“Speaking of…”
Axel had gone to sit down at an empty booth. There were quite a couple since everyone was either standing, or on the floor, or behind the cash register… He couldn’t believe what had just happened. He almost got his ass kicked by a chick. If they hadn’t been pulled apart, he probably would’ve had gotten his assed kicked by a chick! Where was his best buddy after everything that had happened? He was partially, if not mostly to blame for it all.
“Kairi!”
A pair of violet colored eyes turned to look and stare back at a pair of overly concerned green ones. “Are you alright?”
Kairi smiled sweetly, “Duh of course I am. Nothing to it.”
Selphie smiled back, “I’m glad, now come on. Weren’t we all gonna go for ice cream and pizza?”
“True, let’s get to it then. Doesn’t look like there’s going to be a line anytime soon,” she winked.
Both girls made their way to the front of the non-existent line, while Demyx looked more than extremely crestfallen. He had been completely ignored, and twice at that! Was she still holding a grudge? Considering she was the one that broke up with him, he found that highly unlikely. The blond sighed and frowned when he made his way up to the booth Axel was sitting in. He sat down and placed the palms of his hands under his chin.
His best friend stared back at him in a cynical manner, “Oh no Dem, I wasn’t just almost pwned by a girl. Nope. I’m perfectly fine, thanks for asking buddy.”
Demyx sighed again and let his arms droop down onto the table, having his face slam onto it in the process as well.
Axel arched a brow, “What the hell is the matter with you?” He turned to look around, and made a face when he spotted a girl with a much darker shade of red hair than his.
“Sorry…”
It was weird to see Demyx not smiling, it was blasphemous all on it’s own. Things weren’t supposed to be like that, far from it. They had an arrangement; one was to always be cynical and rude, while the other was stupid, happy-go-lucky, and not so rude… That was what they had settled on, but suddenly the blond wasn’t following up to such arrangement. “You’ve always had a thing for red-heads haven’t ya?” At the sound of his own words, Axel couldn’t help but turn a bit pink. He hadn’t meant it to come off as an insinuation of anything. He doubted Demyx caught on it anyway.
“I’ve only had two girlfriends in my short pathetic life, and they’ve both dumped me,” Demyx sulked.
“Well…”
“I’m hopeless Axel, girls just don’t like me!”
“You can’t blame Ariel for dumping you for that Eric dude though.”
Demyx’s eyes watered, “You’re not helping!”
“Eh, sorry. I’ve never been good at the consoling bit.”
“Couldn’t tell.”
“Now buddy, haven’t you ever wondered why these girls dumped you?”
“Not really.”
“Well, you should. Then maybe you could understand why it happened, and prevent it from happening again with someone else in the future. Ariel, she was quite a gal but you can’t really compete with a prince.” Axel leaned back, and did finger quotes after he said ‘prince’.
“But then, what about Kairi? We were perfectly fine. Then she caught me off guard a week before Halloween, after I told her I was going to dress up as a merman.”
Axel blinked, “I would’ve dumped you too if that were the case.”
“No, no she thought it was a cute idea but… I dunno.”
“Hmm, that’s odd.”
“What is Axel?”
The red-head continued to stare at Demyx’s ex-girlfriend as her arm moved down from Selphie’s shoulders to her waist. All in a matter of three seconds, what a record that was. He scratched his chin pensively, as the light bulb from the part of the ceiling they were sitting under flickered on and off.
Demyx stared at him completely confused, and still craved for that ice cream pizza. “Axel? Did you pop a fuse of some sort?”
“Don’t you see Dem?” He leaned across the table and whispered into Demyx’s ear.
The blond’s eyes bugged out, “No! She… wait what?”
Axel rolled his eyes, and inconspicuously pointed over in Kairi’s direction. “She’s a lesbo.”
“A what?”
“A lesbian.”
“Excuse you?”
“Demyx, she likes girls.”
“What’s wrong with liking girls? I don’t see anything wrong with-” It finally hit him, but it naturally took him awhile. His brain was only capable of taking in so much.
“If you don’t believe me just look at her.”
“But…”
Before anymore speculation took place, a loud voice boomed across the diner. The voice belonged to none other than Tifa Lockheart. She had made her way on top of the counter, and somehow had a microphone in hand. “Ladies and gents! Guys and gals! Paying customers and non-paying customers!”
Kairi snorted, “I think we all get the point Tifa.”
Tifa cleared her throat and continued, “Next time one of you decide to pick a fight with someone, please… TAKE IT OUTSIDE! The Paopu Palace does not appreciate being a fighting rink, so please don’t make it one! Or you’ll have to answer to me, is that clear?!”
“And me too!” Yuffie exclaimed.
Everyone nodded and agreed. But Axel slumped down on his seat, and was even more embarrassed than before.
Riku stared at Tifa’s long slender legs from the top of the counter, and then was smacked over the head by Kairi.
“You perv.”
“Shut up Kairi, you’re just as bad.”
“Oh really?”
Sora sighed and made his way to the little boy’s room while his friends continued to quarrel. He needed to tinkle again. It wasn’t his fault he had a weak bladder!
Kairi stared off as Sora walked away from them, “Damn him. He always needs to pee! Riku, why don’t you go get him so we can finally order.”
“Why me? Why not you or Selphie?”
“Maybe you haven’t noticed Riku, but we’re kinda girls.”
“I didn’t think that alone would stop you.”
She pushed him towards the direction of the boy’s restroom playfully, “Go you big goon!”
“Fine, fine I’ll go!”
“Good. Now, Selph… huh? Where did you go?” Kairi looked around frantically, but didn’t see any signs of Selphie.
The background music in the diner had been quite dull for the passed couple of hours, and Yuffie told herself she needed to fix that immediately. She walked over to the back room where all the important controls were, and fiddled around with them. Thankfully her co-workers taught her well, bless that Leon and Cloud. She blushed as inappropriate images popped into her head. She couldn’t help herself! Although the song that began to play next on their local rock station made her smile wide. Yuffie simply loved Bon Jovi!
“YOUR LOVE IS LIKE BAD MEDICINE! BAD MEDICINE IS WHAT I NEED OH OH OH!”
Axel looked around and felt a bit better at the change of music, “Finally, something good.”
Demyx’s mood brightened up as well as he sang along, “There ain’t no doctor that can cure my disease!”
The door chimes were heard once more. There were four more teenagers making their way inside the Paopu Palace. The only girl in the group spotted a familiar face and she smiled.
“Olette!”
“Selphie!”
They walked up to each other and hugged, as the two blond boys rolled their eyes while the chubby brunet smiled at the girls. Kairi joined them and greeted them as well. Even though she found it rather amusing that Olette spotted her cousin straight away, while she on the other hand had been looking for her but alas no luck.
“Axel?”
The red-head blinked at the sight of the kids that just walked in. He felt his heart suddenly drop down into his stomach. Forget the butterflies in the stomach, or hearts fluttering. No, Axel’s heart jumped off a cliff and committed body organ suicide. It just so happened that the results of the jump ended up being somewhere near the stomach.
Demyx snapped his fingers in front of his friend’s face, “Axel? Snap out of it! Axel!”
“Axel?” One of the blond boys asked.
Kairi nodded, “Yeah he’s here too. You wanna say hi to him?”
“Axel!” Demyx shook him violently but still no sign of intelligent life as once before. Maybe his brain had catapulted downwards as well. Or maybe Larxene did beat him senseless, along with everything else.
“Roxas…”
“Oi, get a grip will ya?” Demyx slapped him across his right cheek and huffed in an annoyed manner. And it was not an easy feat to get Demyx annoyed.
Roxas shrugged and shook his head, “Nah he looks busy. Besides I only came here for the pizza and ice cream my cousin promised me.”
The rest of the little group said in unison, “Us too!”
“Oh boy, wait until Sora hears this…” Kairi whispered to Selphie.
“Is he still tinkling? Didn’t you send Riku after him?”
Kairi smirked and nodded, “Yes, but if all goes as planned… I doubt they’d be back any time soon. We should start ordering.”
“But what about Sora, isn’t he paying?”
“Nah, it’s on me today.”
Roxas grinned and placed an arm around her, “Awesome, thanks Kairi.”
“Nah don’t mention it.” Once the rest of them were away from earshot, she whispered some more nonsense to herself. “Besides, it’s only fair. The tab is on me today, while something- or should I say someone will be on Sora. Hehe, I’m so evil.”
“Kairi?”
The naughty plotting fag hag jumped and squeaked, something she hadn’t done in ages. “Selphie! Don’t do that!”
She giggled and apologized, “Sorry but they were just waiting for you to pay their order.”
“Oh right… Sheesh they ordered already?”
“Yeah, apparently they’re not like us that take forever to do so.”
“Meh… they must really want their flippin’ pizza and ice cream.”
--------
“Sora? Are you done yet? You take an awful long time to piss.”
“Riku? I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Huh? What is it?”
“I… need… you.”
Riku froze on the spot, and the oddly appropriate song continued to go on…
That’s what you get for falling in love,
then you bleed,
You get a little and it’s never enough,
On your knees,
That’s what you get for falling in love,
Now this boys addicted because your kiss is the drug!
The silver-haired boy growled, “I hate coincidental circumstances…”
-----
A/N; So what did you guys think of this chapter? I'm so sorry it took me this long to update. I'm really having the time of my life writing this AU series. I can honestly say I haven't felt this excited to write a fic in...ever.
Now, as for my own witty/silly/retarded creations... I do plan on sketching up the Paopu Palace so all of you can see what it looks like. ;) And maybe I'll play around with the menu some more on the next chapter. Shame that Christmas kinda already passed and this is still supposed to be a Christmas fic. *sigh* Either way, the show must go on! As for the Kairi rules unforunately there was only one this time around, and it wasn't even typed up. But I'm not cheating you out of it! I promise more in the future, but without further ado...
Kairi Rule #76;
A Kairi is known for her snazzy pink attire, which suits her more than perfectly fine. But it is also a known fact that when a Kairi gets any of her snazzy pink attire dirty, stained, or tainted in any way, shape or form the guilty party is far from being a safe party. Your safest bet is to either A: Offer to take it to the cleaners later on. Or. B: As our loveable Demyx would say... Run, run away!
Thank you and goodnight everyone! Happy belated Christmas! And a very Happy New Year's to come! :D