Danger Girl!
Smallville: 8-21: Injustice
Chloe! You in Danger, Girl!
For a moment, I was relieved. I thought that Chloe had cried a few tears and healed herself (remember when she could do that? She needs that now). I was sure that Chloe had regained her mental health and had returned to the manly chest of Clark...
and the ample bosoms of the rest of us (mostly). Hallelujah! and thank you Tess Mercer, no wait, Alien Jesus, I cried (but in exultation, not weepy crying).
I just knew that OUR CHLOE was back!
OUR CHLOE, the one whose only bad advice to Clark was about Lana ("Take her back, Clark! Try again for the eleven millionth time!").
OUR CHLOE, the one who always had a crush (even when she didn't and supposedly had gotten over it) on Clark and whose first priority was always Clark. Sorry Jimmy, but when were you happiest with Chloe? It was when she was crushing on Clark and not Davis.
OUR CHLOE, the one who helped Clark google and research and figure things out. OUR CHLOE, the one who trusted Clark to do the right thing.
OUR CHLOE, the one who only nagged Clark about Flying and that was because she secretly wanted to be the first one to fly him. Although technically, she couldn't be the first, because Lex as Zod got the first jump on Clark. And then there was that unfortunate falling off the building mishap with Lana where Lana sort of flew him. And Lana had her handcuffs on, so there was the kinky aspect to her flewing Clark. But that was the fun thing about Lana---the level of kinky that she inspired.
OUR CHLOE was back!
OUR CHLOE was her sensible self and was asking Clark about his plans instead of imposing her warped plans on him. The warped plans that didn't work out. Chloe sacrificed herself to Davis to stop his running around and killing people, but here Davis was, still running around and killing people. Chloe's sacrifice didn't stop that. Chloe, let me give you a little advice. Once a guy runs around on you and kills people; he will always run around on you and kill people, no matter what he promises. Once a murderous cheater, always a murderous cheater. It's the way of the world, honey, and nothing that you do will change that. Get another guy. One who won't run around on you.
But then I started thinking, "Maybe OUR CHLOE is not really back." I was looking at her wardrobe choices and unease gripped me...
Is this the sort of ensemble OUR CHLOE would wear?
And then I looked at what Clark was wearing....
and I knew something was amiss. Since when does Clark wear a black windbreaker and T shirt? Never! Not even in his Kal El wild days (he was very keen on leather then) did Clark wear a black cotton jacket.
Only in the Phantom Zone of the Alternate Lana as Empowered Woman Universe does Clark even parade around in a blue cotton jacket.
And that's when I knew something was Up. Dammit! Where was Lana? And where was the Red Kryptonite?
Had Lana gone and absorbed a massive amount of Red Kryptonite to go with the Green Kryptonite of her Power Suit? I couldn't blame her if she had. Lana will do anything to get away from Pink. But then I was suspicious again. Lana never liked Clark when he was on the Red Stuff, so why would she do it?
I kept waiting for Lana and the Red K to show up, but no....
Plastique (who does look like Lana) and some other people showed up. And most of them dropped dead pretty quickly. Tess does make quick merciless decisions.
Then OUR CHLOE turned out to be....
NOT CHLOE!
She was some chick named AVA....
And WHO is AVA? Is Ava a new alias for Tina Greer?
I then remembered when Tina Greer became Lana and I wondered. Had Lana become the new Tina Greer?
Hahaha---I'm writing like Carrie Bradshaw! Have I become the new Carrie Bradshaw? Nope, I'm at my computer wearing stretchy pants and Carrie Bradshaw would never type on her Apple wearing stretchy pants. She would be wearing some sexy lingerie. And I'm not even wearing a bra (but I don't have that ample bosom discussed above). Maybe I'm Samantha...forget that. Back to Smallville personae.
I figured it out! Lana as Tina Greer as Chloe was back and making Clark act all Red Kryptonite Kal El Krazy!
But there was a flaw in this argument. Clark was NOT acting Kal El Krazy; he was acting OUR CHLOE sensible.
No, it was Ollie who was acting all Red Kryptonite Krazy!
Ollie was wearing Red K black...
forcing his sexy pants presence on the unwilling Tess.
Then taking off his sexy pants...
and lolly-gagging in Tess's bed.
Dangling himself in front of her....
Tempting her with his goody. Now Lana even as Tina Greer as Chloe would become all Priggish if it were Clark dangling himself. But Tess has become religious lately and although she appreciates a goodly and sizable danglely, she would resist the temptation. And so she does...
and she is quite proud of herself.
Tess is on her religious path to Perfect Enlightenment. Sure, she did the Snake Handler for God thing, but now she has moved on to receiving enlightenment from the Orb of Revelations.
Ever read Revelations from the Bible? It's my opinion that John had Bio-Chemistry imbalances when he wrote it. How he developed the Bio-Chem imbalances I do not know and I make no accusations. The Gospel that John wrote is a very straight forward narrative with Greek philosophizing on the side. John's mind went Cosmic when it came to Revelations.
Tess's mind has gone Cosmic with the Orb of Revelations. And she is a very happy woman with her O....O....O....ORB!
Ahhhh! Some girls have all the luck. I'll bet her toes are curling up. And not in a Wicked Witch of the West Way.
OUR CHLOE is still missing and sacrificing herself to Davis. Only I would say that Davis's victims are the sacrifices, not Chloe.
Who knows where this is all leading to? Clark had better start wearing his RED jacket and set things right with his might.
Incidentals:
There are a lot of Orbs in this episode:
of the Red Blue Blur. But he got his Red Blue Blur MoJo back again.
And let us remember OUR CHLOE, when she was wise.
In Committed, Lois complains to Chloe that Clark was right about something...
And Chloe says, "Clark usually is."
Chloe, keep repeating that to yourself.
Most screencaps are from homeofthenutty
Chloe! You in Danger, Girl!
For a moment, I was relieved. I thought that Chloe had cried a few tears and healed herself (remember when she could do that? She needs that now). I was sure that Chloe had regained her mental health and had returned to the manly chest of Clark...
and the ample bosoms of the rest of us (mostly). Hallelujah! and thank you Tess Mercer, no wait, Alien Jesus, I cried (but in exultation, not weepy crying).
I just knew that OUR CHLOE was back!
OUR CHLOE, the one whose only bad advice to Clark was about Lana ("Take her back, Clark! Try again for the eleven millionth time!").
OUR CHLOE, the one who always had a crush (even when she didn't and supposedly had gotten over it) on Clark and whose first priority was always Clark. Sorry Jimmy, but when were you happiest with Chloe? It was when she was crushing on Clark and not Davis.
OUR CHLOE, the one who helped Clark google and research and figure things out. OUR CHLOE, the one who trusted Clark to do the right thing.
OUR CHLOE, the one who only nagged Clark about Flying and that was because she secretly wanted to be the first one to fly him. Although technically, she couldn't be the first, because Lex as Zod got the first jump on Clark. And then there was that unfortunate falling off the building mishap with Lana where Lana sort of flew him. And Lana had her handcuffs on, so there was the kinky aspect to her flewing Clark. But that was the fun thing about Lana---the level of kinky that she inspired.
OUR CHLOE was back!
OUR CHLOE was her sensible self and was asking Clark about his plans instead of imposing her warped plans on him. The warped plans that didn't work out. Chloe sacrificed herself to Davis to stop his running around and killing people, but here Davis was, still running around and killing people. Chloe's sacrifice didn't stop that. Chloe, let me give you a little advice. Once a guy runs around on you and kills people; he will always run around on you and kill people, no matter what he promises. Once a murderous cheater, always a murderous cheater. It's the way of the world, honey, and nothing that you do will change that. Get another guy. One who won't run around on you.
But then I started thinking, "Maybe OUR CHLOE is not really back." I was looking at her wardrobe choices and unease gripped me...
Is this the sort of ensemble OUR CHLOE would wear?
And then I looked at what Clark was wearing....
and I knew something was amiss. Since when does Clark wear a black windbreaker and T shirt? Never! Not even in his Kal El wild days (he was very keen on leather then) did Clark wear a black cotton jacket.
Only in the Phantom Zone of the Alternate Lana as Empowered Woman Universe does Clark even parade around in a blue cotton jacket.
And that's when I knew something was Up. Dammit! Where was Lana? And where was the Red Kryptonite?
Had Lana gone and absorbed a massive amount of Red Kryptonite to go with the Green Kryptonite of her Power Suit? I couldn't blame her if she had. Lana will do anything to get away from Pink. But then I was suspicious again. Lana never liked Clark when he was on the Red Stuff, so why would she do it?
I kept waiting for Lana and the Red K to show up, but no....
Plastique (who does look like Lana) and some other people showed up. And most of them dropped dead pretty quickly. Tess does make quick merciless decisions.
Then OUR CHLOE turned out to be....
NOT CHLOE!
She was some chick named AVA....
And WHO is AVA? Is Ava a new alias for Tina Greer?
I then remembered when Tina Greer became Lana and I wondered. Had Lana become the new Tina Greer?
Hahaha---I'm writing like Carrie Bradshaw! Have I become the new Carrie Bradshaw? Nope, I'm at my computer wearing stretchy pants and Carrie Bradshaw would never type on her Apple wearing stretchy pants. She would be wearing some sexy lingerie. And I'm not even wearing a bra (but I don't have that ample bosom discussed above). Maybe I'm Samantha...forget that. Back to Smallville personae.
I figured it out! Lana as Tina Greer as Chloe was back and making Clark act all Red Kryptonite Kal El Krazy!
But there was a flaw in this argument. Clark was NOT acting Kal El Krazy; he was acting OUR CHLOE sensible.
No, it was Ollie who was acting all Red Kryptonite Krazy!
Ollie was wearing Red K black...
forcing his sexy pants presence on the unwilling Tess.
Then taking off his sexy pants...
and lolly-gagging in Tess's bed.
Dangling himself in front of her....
Tempting her with his goody. Now Lana even as Tina Greer as Chloe would become all Priggish if it were Clark dangling himself. But Tess has become religious lately and although she appreciates a goodly and sizable danglely, she would resist the temptation. And so she does...
and she is quite proud of herself.
Tess is on her religious path to Perfect Enlightenment. Sure, she did the Snake Handler for God thing, but now she has moved on to receiving enlightenment from the Orb of Revelations.
Ever read Revelations from the Bible? It's my opinion that John had Bio-Chemistry imbalances when he wrote it. How he developed the Bio-Chem imbalances I do not know and I make no accusations. The Gospel that John wrote is a very straight forward narrative with Greek philosophizing on the side. John's mind went Cosmic when it came to Revelations.
Tess's mind has gone Cosmic with the Orb of Revelations. And she is a very happy woman with her O....O....O....ORB!
Ahhhh! Some girls have all the luck. I'll bet her toes are curling up. And not in a Wicked Witch of the West Way.
OUR CHLOE is still missing and sacrificing herself to Davis. Only I would say that Davis's victims are the sacrifices, not Chloe.
Who knows where this is all leading to? Clark had better start wearing his RED jacket and set things right with his might.
Incidentals:
There are a lot of Orbs in this episode:
of the Red Blue Blur. But he got his Red Blue Blur MoJo back again.
And let us remember OUR CHLOE, when she was wise.
In Committed, Lois complains to Chloe that Clark was right about something...
And Chloe says, "Clark usually is."
Chloe, keep repeating that to yourself.
Most screencaps are from homeofthenutty