{fic} White Lies - Chapter 3
Title: White Lies
Author: charcoaldonkey
Pairing: OhnoxNino (with a little JunxAiba)
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG-13 (for now.. hehe)
Summary: "The rain beat down harder and Ohno looked like he’d been shot. He fell to his knees and ran his hands through his hair as tears spilled down his cheeks. “Nino…” He whispered, “Please… don’t do this.”
*A/N:
Okay so I think i'll need to make the posting a little bit longer from now on, (I do need time to write it >.<)
What with school work and all,i may be a little busy so it may take a few days longer
ANYWAY here's a longish chap explaining quite a lot ^.^ Although I only put a "from the past" scene in this post because it was long enough
Anyway, enough talking before i put you to sleep >.<
Read on~!
*
Three Months Before:
“Kazunari.”
Nino looked up at the man’s tone. Johnny rarely showed anger, but when he did it was serious. “Hai…”
The old man pursed his lips and stared down his crooked nose at the idol. “I want you to look at these.” He threw a manila envelope down on the desk between them and Nino stared at it for a moment. He reached out slowly and opened it, pulling out several pictures.
His eyes widened as he shuffled through them, his stomach doing acrobatics at the sight.
Someone had taken pictures of them. It was on the dock, before they had left for the little island, someone had seen them. “Oh god…” He breathed, looking down at Ohno, kissing his forehead.
“Care to explain yourself?” Johnny smiled, sending a chill up Nino’s spine, but he knew better than to take the question seriously.
“Why… isn’t Ohno here? And why is it only now? This was a month ago.” He was shaking; he could feel it, and he knew Johnny saw it.
“I’m a busy man Kazunari, this is the only time I could make for this… problem, and unfortunately Satoshi is busy filming today. These were sent in about three weeks after they were taken. We only just managed to hush the damn person up.” He slammed his fist down on the desk. “Do you have any idea what would have happened if this was released to the press?!”
Nino flinched, his eyes still glued to the pictures. “Yes…”
“Oh you do!” He barked out a laughed, harsh and uncaring. “Well that’s great then. I’m so relieved.”
Silence settled between them for a moment and Nino looked up, waiting for their punishment.
“Have you forgotten the most important rule here? Absolutely no inter-band relationships! I won’t allow it!” He lit a cigarette and took a long drag, blowing the smoke at Nino. “Break up with him.”
Nino’s eyes widened in shock and he dropped the pictures. “I won’t.” His voice was steel, and Johnny just smirked, leaning forward and pressing the butt of his cigarette into the nearest photograph. Nino watched bitterly as a hole burned between their embrace.
“You will. Or I’ll make sure you two don’t get any jobs until you’re my age.”
“Then I’ll quit!” Nino snarled, standing up with his hands firmly on the desk. “You don’t control my life Johnny.”
“Yes, I do.” He laughed and pulled a document from a drawer. “This is the contract you signed. If you quit Arashi now, that will be a breach of contract and you will be fined 2,000,000 yen. Now, I know you don’t have that kind of money Kazunari.” He smiled. “Break up with him now. Or I’ll make Satoshi’s life a living hell the second you step out of this office.”
Nino hissed through his teeth, kicking the chair across the room and slamming his fists down on the desk. “What’s wrong with loving him?! The fans like Ohmiya SK, it’s fine! There should be no problem with it, we’ll just be more careful!”
“Ohmiya SK is just a silly little act Kazu. It’s completely different from real life.” Johnny sighed and checked his watch. “Now hurry up and decide, I have a meeting in ten minutes. Or… If you’d rather, we could just call Satoshi? That may speed things up a bit.”
Johnny smiled smugly at him and he bit down hard on his lip, tasting blood but not caring. “Johnny-san…” He breathed, his head lowered. “Please”
“Kazu, it’s the rules. Now I’ll give you a month to do it, and that’s as far as I’ll bend on the matter. Get out of my office.” He stood and took Nino by the arm with surprising strength, leading him out of the room and closing the door behind him.
- - - - - - -
Nino somehow managed to find his way back to their dressing rooms at the opposite side of the building; he didn’t remember walking there.
He stumbled into the room, letting his bag slide of his shoulder and reaching out automatically for a bottle of water off the small table. He raised it to his lips but his hand was shaking so hard that none of it found its way to his mouth.
“Nino? What’s up…?”
He turned robotically at his name to find Jun standing a few feet away, the only one in the room. Nino meant to shake his head, to smile and say ‘Nothing!’ and walk away, but the next thing he knew the floor was rushing up to meet him, and Jun’s cry of shock echoed in his ears.
“Woah, Nino what’s going on?!” Jun spluttered, catching him in his lap, and peering at his pale face with motherly concern. “What happened? … Nino?”
To Nino’s horror he could feel tears leaking from the corner of his eyes and he sucked in a shaky breath, trying to calm himself down. He didn’t cry. It was just something he never did.
Jun pushed the hair gently from his face and murmured soothing words until Nino had regained his composure enough to sit up slightly. “What happened, Nino?”
Nino shook his head and closed his eyes, his hands still balled into fists. “Jun he found out about-about me and Ohno! He threatened to ruin our careers if I didn’t break up with him…”
Jun’s eyes widened, for his own situation as well as Nino’s. He glanced over to the couch Aiba had been laying on moments before. He turned back to Nino with a frown. “Does he know about…?” Nino shook his head and Jun let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes for a moment before bringing himself back to the situation at hand. “What did Ohno say?”
“He doesn’t know! He’s filming today and Johnny wants me to tell him!” He cried, wrapping his arms tightly around Jun’s waist and shaking his head into his shirt. “I can’t do it Jun, but he won’t let me quit, we all signed a contract.”
Jun threaded his fingers through Nino’s dark hair comfortingly, and nodded, trying hard to come up with a solution.
“I-I have to tell him though…” Nino groaned. “Jun it’s going to kill him… We love each other, and knowing that but not being allowed to, it’s-it’s too much… Jun maybe if I just… pretended that I didn’t love him and ended it like that,” His voice broke and he shivered against Jun’s chest. “Then maybe he would find it easier t-to get over me…?”
“Nino…” Jun breathed out slowly, sorting through right and wrong in his head. “I don’t think that’s the best idea-”
“Then what would you do Jun?” His nails dug into his back slightly, as he hugged him closer. “What would you do if no matter what, you had to break up with Aiba-chan… How could you ever tell him that you love him but you can’t be with him? That you want to grow old with him but that you’re not even allowed to kiss him? How could I ever do that to Ohno, it would be torture!”
“But, Nino!” Jun sighed, sitting him up and pressing lightly on his shoulders. “Nino even if you did lie to him like that… Do you have any idea how much that would hurt him? He loves you, you know… And saving him from that torture, it’s like condemning yourself… Just… it’s your decision in the end, and I’ll help as best I can because I love you both… but there must be another way to fix this.”
“I know he loves me…” Nino breathed, closing his eyes and wringing his hands. “But if I-if he can’t stop then the pain won’t either… Jun, Johnny-san has me backed against a wall here.” He sighed and looked up, his face pale; tear streaked with an expression like he’d just witnessed a murder. “And I only have three options… One, I refuse to listen to him, and we get kicked out of Johnny’s. That means Arashi splits up… Two, I do listen to what he says and explain what’s going on to Ohno. We split up and Arashi stays together. Then three… Three is the option when I listen to Johnny, except I push Ohno away and make it clear I don’t love him. This option is a terrible choice for short-term. It’s going to really hurt him… more than I can probably imagine, but long term he’ll eventually get over me… and Arashi can stay together too…”
Jun clicked his tongue angrily “Well what’s wrong with option two then?”
“Option two...” He said slowly, his face tensing. “Option two is the last thing I’d choose. Because option two means putting Ohno through this.” He gazed pleadingly up at Jun. “Jun-kun I feel like somebody ripped my heart from my chest and set it on fire… I love him so much!” Tears spilled over his eyelids and down his cheeks faster than Jun could blink and suddenly he was sobbing again “Jun I love him more than I can explain and suddenly being told I’m not allowed to anymore… Johnny could threaten me with my life and there’s no way I’d put him through this.”
Jun was silent, “So if, and this is an if, you choose option three… And eventually Ohno gets over you and moves on…” He paused and lifted Nino’s chin so that their eyes met. “What happens to you?”
He raised his eyebrows slightly, his eyes shifting thoughtfully at the unexpected question as tears still made their way freely down his cheeks. “I…” He drifted off, looking down again. “It doesn’t matter-”
“-Yes it does.” Jun said firmly. “Trust me Nino, it matters.”
He shook his head kindly. “I’ll… be the same as before… and I’ll feel the same as before until the day I die, but he doesn’t need to know that.” His lip shook and he bit down hard to keep it under control. “Jun I- could you… Would you be there? When-after I do it, could you just… you know, be there for him…?” He was trembling now with the effort of holding everything back, and Jun could see him breaking. “He tries to pretend like things don’t bother him but they do, and-and he’ll need you… Please?”
“…Yeah, Nino” Jun felt a lump in his own throat, and he pulled the older man to him again, rocking him soothingly as he fell apart. “Yeah of course…”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
‘The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away…
Recently, I can’t breathe
And I too want to escape…’
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Author: charcoaldonkey
Pairing: OhnoxNino (with a little JunxAiba)
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG-13 (for now.. hehe)
Summary: "The rain beat down harder and Ohno looked like he’d been shot. He fell to his knees and ran his hands through his hair as tears spilled down his cheeks. “Nino…” He whispered, “Please… don’t do this.”
*A/N:
Okay so I think i'll need to make the posting a little bit longer from now on, (I do need time to write it >.<)
What with school work and all,i may be a little busy so it may take a few days longer
ANYWAY here's a longish chap explaining quite a lot ^.^ Although I only put a "from the past" scene in this post because it was long enough
Anyway, enough talking before i put you to sleep >.<
Read on~!
*
Three Months Before:
“Kazunari.”
Nino looked up at the man’s tone. Johnny rarely showed anger, but when he did it was serious. “Hai…”
The old man pursed his lips and stared down his crooked nose at the idol. “I want you to look at these.” He threw a manila envelope down on the desk between them and Nino stared at it for a moment. He reached out slowly and opened it, pulling out several pictures.
His eyes widened as he shuffled through them, his stomach doing acrobatics at the sight.
Someone had taken pictures of them. It was on the dock, before they had left for the little island, someone had seen them. “Oh god…” He breathed, looking down at Ohno, kissing his forehead.
“Care to explain yourself?” Johnny smiled, sending a chill up Nino’s spine, but he knew better than to take the question seriously.
“Why… isn’t Ohno here? And why is it only now? This was a month ago.” He was shaking; he could feel it, and he knew Johnny saw it.
“I’m a busy man Kazunari, this is the only time I could make for this… problem, and unfortunately Satoshi is busy filming today. These were sent in about three weeks after they were taken. We only just managed to hush the damn person up.” He slammed his fist down on the desk. “Do you have any idea what would have happened if this was released to the press?!”
Nino flinched, his eyes still glued to the pictures. “Yes…”
“Oh you do!” He barked out a laughed, harsh and uncaring. “Well that’s great then. I’m so relieved.”
Silence settled between them for a moment and Nino looked up, waiting for their punishment.
“Have you forgotten the most important rule here? Absolutely no inter-band relationships! I won’t allow it!” He lit a cigarette and took a long drag, blowing the smoke at Nino. “Break up with him.”
Nino’s eyes widened in shock and he dropped the pictures. “I won’t.” His voice was steel, and Johnny just smirked, leaning forward and pressing the butt of his cigarette into the nearest photograph. Nino watched bitterly as a hole burned between their embrace.
“You will. Or I’ll make sure you two don’t get any jobs until you’re my age.”
“Then I’ll quit!” Nino snarled, standing up with his hands firmly on the desk. “You don’t control my life Johnny.”
“Yes, I do.” He laughed and pulled a document from a drawer. “This is the contract you signed. If you quit Arashi now, that will be a breach of contract and you will be fined 2,000,000 yen. Now, I know you don’t have that kind of money Kazunari.” He smiled. “Break up with him now. Or I’ll make Satoshi’s life a living hell the second you step out of this office.”
Nino hissed through his teeth, kicking the chair across the room and slamming his fists down on the desk. “What’s wrong with loving him?! The fans like Ohmiya SK, it’s fine! There should be no problem with it, we’ll just be more careful!”
“Ohmiya SK is just a silly little act Kazu. It’s completely different from real life.” Johnny sighed and checked his watch. “Now hurry up and decide, I have a meeting in ten minutes. Or… If you’d rather, we could just call Satoshi? That may speed things up a bit.”
Johnny smiled smugly at him and he bit down hard on his lip, tasting blood but not caring. “Johnny-san…” He breathed, his head lowered. “Please”
“Kazu, it’s the rules. Now I’ll give you a month to do it, and that’s as far as I’ll bend on the matter. Get out of my office.” He stood and took Nino by the arm with surprising strength, leading him out of the room and closing the door behind him.
- - - - - - -
Nino somehow managed to find his way back to their dressing rooms at the opposite side of the building; he didn’t remember walking there.
He stumbled into the room, letting his bag slide of his shoulder and reaching out automatically for a bottle of water off the small table. He raised it to his lips but his hand was shaking so hard that none of it found its way to his mouth.
“Nino? What’s up…?”
He turned robotically at his name to find Jun standing a few feet away, the only one in the room. Nino meant to shake his head, to smile and say ‘Nothing!’ and walk away, but the next thing he knew the floor was rushing up to meet him, and Jun’s cry of shock echoed in his ears.
“Woah, Nino what’s going on?!” Jun spluttered, catching him in his lap, and peering at his pale face with motherly concern. “What happened? … Nino?”
To Nino’s horror he could feel tears leaking from the corner of his eyes and he sucked in a shaky breath, trying to calm himself down. He didn’t cry. It was just something he never did.
Jun pushed the hair gently from his face and murmured soothing words until Nino had regained his composure enough to sit up slightly. “What happened, Nino?”
Nino shook his head and closed his eyes, his hands still balled into fists. “Jun he found out about-about me and Ohno! He threatened to ruin our careers if I didn’t break up with him…”
Jun’s eyes widened, for his own situation as well as Nino’s. He glanced over to the couch Aiba had been laying on moments before. He turned back to Nino with a frown. “Does he know about…?” Nino shook his head and Jun let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes for a moment before bringing himself back to the situation at hand. “What did Ohno say?”
“He doesn’t know! He’s filming today and Johnny wants me to tell him!” He cried, wrapping his arms tightly around Jun’s waist and shaking his head into his shirt. “I can’t do it Jun, but he won’t let me quit, we all signed a contract.”
Jun threaded his fingers through Nino’s dark hair comfortingly, and nodded, trying hard to come up with a solution.
“I-I have to tell him though…” Nino groaned. “Jun it’s going to kill him… We love each other, and knowing that but not being allowed to, it’s-it’s too much… Jun maybe if I just… pretended that I didn’t love him and ended it like that,” His voice broke and he shivered against Jun’s chest. “Then maybe he would find it easier t-to get over me…?”
“Nino…” Jun breathed out slowly, sorting through right and wrong in his head. “I don’t think that’s the best idea-”
“Then what would you do Jun?” His nails dug into his back slightly, as he hugged him closer. “What would you do if no matter what, you had to break up with Aiba-chan… How could you ever tell him that you love him but you can’t be with him? That you want to grow old with him but that you’re not even allowed to kiss him? How could I ever do that to Ohno, it would be torture!”
“But, Nino!” Jun sighed, sitting him up and pressing lightly on his shoulders. “Nino even if you did lie to him like that… Do you have any idea how much that would hurt him? He loves you, you know… And saving him from that torture, it’s like condemning yourself… Just… it’s your decision in the end, and I’ll help as best I can because I love you both… but there must be another way to fix this.”
“I know he loves me…” Nino breathed, closing his eyes and wringing his hands. “But if I-if he can’t stop then the pain won’t either… Jun, Johnny-san has me backed against a wall here.” He sighed and looked up, his face pale; tear streaked with an expression like he’d just witnessed a murder. “And I only have three options… One, I refuse to listen to him, and we get kicked out of Johnny’s. That means Arashi splits up… Two, I do listen to what he says and explain what’s going on to Ohno. We split up and Arashi stays together. Then three… Three is the option when I listen to Johnny, except I push Ohno away and make it clear I don’t love him. This option is a terrible choice for short-term. It’s going to really hurt him… more than I can probably imagine, but long term he’ll eventually get over me… and Arashi can stay together too…”
Jun clicked his tongue angrily “Well what’s wrong with option two then?”
“Option two...” He said slowly, his face tensing. “Option two is the last thing I’d choose. Because option two means putting Ohno through this.” He gazed pleadingly up at Jun. “Jun-kun I feel like somebody ripped my heart from my chest and set it on fire… I love him so much!” Tears spilled over his eyelids and down his cheeks faster than Jun could blink and suddenly he was sobbing again “Jun I love him more than I can explain and suddenly being told I’m not allowed to anymore… Johnny could threaten me with my life and there’s no way I’d put him through this.”
Jun was silent, “So if, and this is an if, you choose option three… And eventually Ohno gets over you and moves on…” He paused and lifted Nino’s chin so that their eyes met. “What happens to you?”
He raised his eyebrows slightly, his eyes shifting thoughtfully at the unexpected question as tears still made their way freely down his cheeks. “I…” He drifted off, looking down again. “It doesn’t matter-”
“-Yes it does.” Jun said firmly. “Trust me Nino, it matters.”
He shook his head kindly. “I’ll… be the same as before… and I’ll feel the same as before until the day I die, but he doesn’t need to know that.” His lip shook and he bit down hard to keep it under control. “Jun I- could you… Would you be there? When-after I do it, could you just… you know, be there for him…?” He was trembling now with the effort of holding everything back, and Jun could see him breaking. “He tries to pretend like things don’t bother him but they do, and-and he’ll need you… Please?”
“…Yeah, Nino” Jun felt a lump in his own throat, and he pulled the older man to him again, rocking him soothingly as he fell apart. “Yeah of course…”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
‘The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away…
Recently, I can’t breathe
And I too want to escape…’
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~